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New Keyboard Has Just 53 Keys

Enigma5O writes to tell us The Tech Zone is reporting on a new style of keyboard with just 53 keys. Departing from the normal QWERTY keyboard setup the 'New Standard Keyboard' designed by John Parkinson measures just 12.5 inches wide x 5 inches deep x 1 inch thick and is arranged in alphabetical order. The keyboard has been designed with ergonomics in mind keeping all keys within easy reach of the home position. The only question is, will everyone be willing to relearn how to type?

27 of 638 comments (clear)

  1. Handy by Ironballs · · Score: 2, Funny

    But if they implement a key for CTRL+ALT+DEL, the sales will go high as the sky

    1. Re:Handy by Hymer · · Score: 2, Funny

      "But if they implement a key for CTRL+ALT+DEL, the sales will go high as the sky"
      I keep hearing about those keys... and I do not really understand the meaning of this key sequence...

      Let's just see how fast those M$ FanBoyz will mod me troll...

      --

      You don't need Ctrl+Alt+Del if you don't run Windows...

  2. asdhfdljsa fsa;c fjewcfe by Galston · · Score: 4, Funny

    s ajfds jfd skxloq fjdksl;oncds!!!! s)

  3. Re:My Theory of Keyboard Design by dsginter · · Score: 4, Funny

    While we're at it, we should all convert to a more sensible language like Spanish. English is just too difficult to master.

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    More
  4. Re:One word anwser by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    The only question is, will everyone be willing to relearn how to type?

    I hdva bewn psink thns ntw k3ybderd fgr tge lezt twd wqeks, snd I cvn hqnfstly sny twat ft hdz grwbhly omprpved py twpvng spwed mnd ackuraly.

  5. Impossible to game with by ezpei · · Score: 4, Funny

    You'd need two hands just to reach A, W, S, and D and god forbid you have to strafe

  6. Re:Pictures by bje2 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Um, even with safe search on, what is up with that 2nd pic???

    --

    "Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true." - Homer Simpson
  7. Re:Space Key by AKAImBatman · · Score: 2, Funny

    There's a "SpFn" key directly in the bottom-center of the keyboard. I assume that means a combination of the SpaceBar and Function buttons.

    Of course, if they can get away with a keyboard design like this, my keyboard design should rule the world! Just images, all your keys arranged in a circular fashion on a lazy suzan. As you type, you spin the keyboard to move the buttons into position for striking. I'll be rich, rich I tell you!

    Or maybe this Fisher Price keyboard isn't going anywhere. (Except out the door.)

  8. I created a new type of car by hedleyroos · · Score: 5, Funny

    It has only a gas pedal. You have to pull the door handle and hit gas simultaneously to brake.

    I switched the gearlever from the traditional five to a more ergonomical two gears and second gear is the default. Studies have proven that more motorists pull away in second.

    We expect this new model to replace traditional models around the same time DVORAK replaces QWERTY.

  9. 1TZ GR3AT, 3V3RY-1 SHUD HAV 1 by ahodgkinson · · Score: 2, Funny
    1 KAN T1P3 MUC B3TT3R W1TH TH3 N3W K33B00RD!

    51N5 1T HAZ L355 K33Z 1 KAN AL50 T1P3 FA5T3R + M0R3 AKURAT3LY.

    1T5 35P3C1ALLY G00D F0R WR1T1NG 5PAM MA1L, WH1CH H3LP5 M3 B3 M0R3 3FF1C13NT AT W0RK.

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    ---- It won't be as bad as you fear or as good as you hope, but it will take twice as long as you plan.
  10. New and improved 49 keys! by PurpleButter · · Score: 2, Funny

    No need for those arrows in the middle of the keyboard.
    h, j, k and l work just perfectly fine.

    --
    Look at the whole picture, not just the hole in the picture.
  11. Re:My Theory of Keyboard Design by squiggleslash · · Score: 1, Funny

    Well, there's probably some truth to that, but with all the money he's getting for his magazine column, not to mention the copyright royalties he gets from his symphonies, maybe it's time Dvorak thought about letting his 80-90 year old keyboard design patents lapse for the good of mankind?

    --
    You are not alone. This is not normal. None of this is normal.
  12. Re:My Theory of Keyboard Design by mtdnelson · · Score: 3, Funny
    Esperanto, please. No masculine/feminine/neuter, no irregular verbs, only one way to form plurals...

    Apparantly it only takes a week to learn Esperanto. When everyone else speaks it, I'll only be a week behind!

    I believe that argument was coined by a lady called Trudi Berger (not sure of the spelling, sorry), who used to be a specialist in language crash courses at York University in the 70s.

    She used to help her students get top grades in modern language exams in a week (from scratch). The only problem is that you often forget in less than seven days what was learnt in the previous week! So the solution was to follow one of her crash courses with an extended visit to the appropriate country...

    --
    Michael Nelson
  13. Re:My Theory of Keyboard Design by eraserewind · · Score: 4, Funny

    Interesting, but all the same please remind me never to buy a keyboard from you.

  14. in other news... by critical_v · · Score: 3, Funny

    i just designed a guitar with 6 frets and 24 strings...of course, now the tuning pattern is completely different, so i'll call it..uhh..."new standard tuning"! i wonder if it'll catch on.

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    You sure 'bout dat?
  15. Re:QWERTY, DVORAK, ABCDEF by timster · · Score: 2, Funny

    Dude, you've got it all wrong -- it's not "TYPEWRITER", it's "RUPERT".

    Ere Rupert typewriter put, Rupert wet rut pet pert. Yet Rupert pet pert wet Rupert. Pretty? Tire Rupert pouty tree try pee.

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    I have seen the future, and it is inconvenient.
  16. Re:My Theory of Keyboard Design by Yocto+Yotta · · Score: 2, Funny

    My vote is for Orkian. No masculine/feminine/neuter, no irregular verbs, no nanu nanus...

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    A B A C A B B
  17. Binary! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Spanish? Binary all the way!

  18. Re:One word anwser by b4k3d+b34nz · · Score: 2, Funny

    And I still haven't figured out what "magltheuansr" is.

    "Menstrual Hag"--courtesy of the Internet Anagram Server.

    --
    Grammar Lesson: you're is a contraction of "you are"; your means you possess something; yore means days gone by.
  19. Damn by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    I just bought a new keyboard.

  20. Re:My Theory of Keyboard Design by zippthorne · · Score: 5, Funny

    That's true, spanish is easy to use. Just like mac. French is even easier, and they have a bureau to stamp out unfrench words, keeping it closed and proprietary - windows. English is a bit more open-source. As a result, it seems to have incorporated just about every word under the sun, so really it should only be used by hardcore language hobbyists.

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    Can you be Even More Awesome?!
  21. Re:Pictures by misfit13b · · Score: 2, Funny

    Must be the inventors...

    They came to Earth to give us new keyboard layouts, and shop for pants.

  22. Re:Space Key by C10H14N2 · · Score: 2, Funny

    They also forgot the solenoid to bang the side of the casing with every keypress like the IBM 5251. Now _that_ was ergonomics. [shudder]

  23. Re:My Theory of Keyboard Design by mdielmann · · Score: 3, Funny

    [English] seems to have incorporated just about every word under the sun, so really it should only be used by hardcore language hobbyists.

    Have you seen how most people use English? It appears they all think they're hardcore language hobbyists...

    --
    Sure I'm paranoid, but am I paranoid enough?
  24. No windows button?!?! by meinders · · Score: 2, Funny

    There isn't a windows button! Which key am I going to use to open the start menu now? ha

  25. Re:My Theory of Keyboard Design by StrongAxe · · Score: 2, Funny

    She used to help her students get top grades in modern language exams in a week (from scratch). The only problem is that you often forget in less than seven days what was learnt in the previous week! So the solution was to follow one of her crash courses with an extended visit to the appropriate country...

    How much is a round-trip ticket to Esperantia?

  26. Re:My Theory of Keyboard Design by dovgr · · Score: 2, Funny

    Using Dvorak with the keytops displaying the characters is really missing the whole point. The whole idea of touchtyping is that you should *NEVER* look at your fingers when you type. I've been using Dvorak for more than 20 years now, and I have never owned a "Dvorak keyboard". (It is actually a never ending source of pleasure at work, when the frustrated coworkers realize that they cannot type on your keyboard.)