Slashdot Mirror
Computers Top BBC List of Stress Producers
twitter writes "The BBC is reporting results of a poll by UK charity Developing Patient Partnerships that shows crashing computers to be one of the most common stresses and that it's actually killing people by driving them to drink and smoke. The quoted list has: 1. IT problems - 30%, 2. Change in financial status/personal injury - 24%, 3. Commuting - 20%. I've seen people take a smoke break when their computer pops a window and they lose an hour or two of work and admins taking their break straight from the bottle."
kidding right? because sometimes when I am stressed, porn on my comp is a great stress reliever
And guess that the 27% of men and 23% of women who would "light up in such a situation" roughly coorelates to the percentage of smokers in England.
Leela: Bender? My God, you're a mess! ... what I don't do is none of your business.
Bender: Leave me alone.
Leela: Look at the 5:00 rust. You've been up all night not drinking, haven't you?
Bender: Hey
Leela: Please, Bender, have some malt liquor. If not for yourself, then for the people who love you.
The ones that are high?
The logic distilled:
When you're stressed, do you smoke or drink? [read: do you smoke or drink? This is an awful question for establishing a link. Possible alternate question: "do you like a massage when you're stressed?"]
What stresses you? Do crashing computers stress you? ["Yeah." Of course they do.]
Therefore, computers drive people to drink.
Nowhere have they established a causal link between the group that is stressed and the group that drinks, aside from what you'd expect from pretty random overlap. This has the smell of a bad study and results blown up to sound outrageous. The article reads like a bunch of observations about overlapping groups concluding with inflammatory statements about two of the groups which are only vaguely linked in the actual data.
Another analogy: IT problems lead to sex. Well, IT problems lead to stress, stressed people are more likely to get massages, and a nontrivial number of massage parlors offer sex services. IT problems lead to prostitution! Please give us more funding.
xkcd.com - a webcomic of mathematics, love, and language.
Les Barker's spoken word poem seems to fit this story:
I bought a new computer.
It cost a thousand pound,
But every time I switch it on
It keeps on falling down.
I used to think it was my friend,
But now it drives me 'round the bend.
You'd be surprised the time I spend:
REINSTALLING WINDOZE.
I switch it on -
What is this?
Something wrong with CONFIG SYS
This isn't my idea of bliss:
REINSTALLING WINDOZE.
I want to share my printers and
I want to share my files.
I want to share my anger
'Cause it drives me blooming wild.
My songs, they say, are sublime;
I've conquered cadence, mastered rhyme.
But now-a-days I spend my time:
REINSTALLING WINDOZE.
Reinstall - oh what fun!
It says it helps you get things done.
Every day now, everyone's
REINSTALLING WINDOZE.
Look again. It will say
All you do is plug and play.
How do I spend every day?
REINSTALLING WINDOZE.
It can't find my printer and
It can't locate my mouse.
The other day it drove me
Right out of the bloomin' house.
Still unplugged, still unplayed,
I e-mailed God in search of aid.
He's far to busy, I'm afraid...
REINSTALLING WINDOZE.
Up at dawn for one more try
Will it work? - Can pigs fly?
How do I expect to die?
REINSTALLING WINDOZE.
I used to like a drink or three.
No time now - don't call for me.
How will I spend eternity?
REINSTALLING WINDOZE.
SJW: a person who perceives an injustice, and while correcting it, commits a greater injustice.
There's a second box along the side of that page, showing one how to avoid stress. Cool! Let's take a look:
...Have a nice evening.
H HHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
1. Live a healthy lifestyle
Well, duh. OK, maybe someone under stress needs the bleeding obvious told to them. Whatever.
2. Don't take too much on
Too much what? Stress?
3. Decide what causes you stress and change it
OS9 causes my stress. The Accounting Dept. says I can't change it either.
4. Avoid unnecessary conflict
So, one should just smile at that luser and say "Yes, you're right - it's a virus I let in through the firewall. Your kids music collection acquired through Kaaza - on our corporate laptop - has _nothing_ to do with all those strange pop-ups. No sir. I'll have it all fixed up in a jiffy."? OK.
5. Manage your time better
Good. Hang on, cell phone ringing again...
6. Practice saying "no" without feeling guilty
Me: Hullo?
Them: Hey - the server's down
Me: *checks with ssh* Odd - it was runnig like a top when I left for home.
Them: Well, with the construction going on in here, the electricians kinda shut the power to the server room off.
Me: Ummmm... The server is on UPS. Why's it dead?
Them: They shut it off a 5. It's now 8. The drill they plugged into the UPS didn't help either. Can you come in and fix it?
Me: NO. Get them to fix it - it's thier fault! And nothing you say will make me feel guilty enough to come in.
Them: Suuuure. Get your ass in here or your fired! The CIO golfs at my country club, you know.
Me: Yeahyeahyeah. Be there ASAP. As soon as I explain to my wife why I'm going to work during her birthday celebration.
Yup, no stress there....
7. Take time out to "recharge your batteries"
Me: Yup, the batteries aren't charging. You guys fried the my UPS batteries with your drill. You've trashed my DB and destroyed a 3000VA UPS. I need to see the foreman now - you guys owe us for all this.
FatAssSparky: Fuck you.
8. Talk about problems so they do not get out of proportion
Me: I'd like to talk to you about your workers killing power to my server room, and...
Foreman: Sorry 'bout that, buddy. Now, we want we should take 4 days to finish up here, or an extra week with similar 'mishaps', if you wanna start sqwaking about our little boo-boo dis evenin'?
Me: *WINCE*
9. Make time to see friends
Friend: Soko, if your just going to bitch about your day, I'm leaving. I hate that geeky stuff. Oh, and you pay the tab.
10. Do not use alcohol, nicotine or caffeine to cope with stress
Are they FUCKING KIDDING?? WHO ARE THESE MORONS?? I'll FUCKING SHOW THEM STRESS. WITH A SNOWSHOVEL CAVING IN THIER FUCKING SKULL!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGH
Soko
"Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm." - Anonymous
Unless your apps were written by God Himself, they will fail on you.
Don't rely on it even then, heck Jesus saves.