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Alcatel and Lucent to Merge

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the come-together dept.

Cappella writes "It is confirmed. Alcatel and Lucent are combining to form a USD $25 billion entity. This marks a new wave of telecommunications company consolidation in the next few months to come." They first tried to work out a merger five years ago, but finally, at long last, it's come to fruition.

11 of 174 comments (clear)

  1. AT&T by HoosierPeschke · · Score: 5, Funny

    Soooooooo will they rename themselves Western Electric and merge with AT&T?

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    1. Re:AT&T by Espectr0 · · Score: 3, Funny

      Since the new company will be headquartered in Paris, it would have to be French Electric.

      Don't worry. The US branch would be called Freedom Electric.

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  2. Bets On The New Name by Draegonis · · Score: 2, Funny

    I was thinking "Lucatel". What else we got?

    1. Re:Bets On The New Name by C.A.+Nony+Mouse · · Score: 5, Funny

      Accident.

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      J
    2. Re:Bets On The New Name by stox · · Score: 4, Funny

      Lucatania, a perfect target for the Germans.

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    3. Re:Bets On The New Name by cloudofstrife · · Score: 2, Funny

      I've heard Lucratel. Hopefully it won't set the expectations for the new company too high.

  3. wtf? by Beuno · · Score: 2, Funny

    fruition???
    Common... you're really going to say "fruition"?

  4. Oh goody! by cubicledrone · · Score: 3, Funny

    $25 billion? That should be good for at least ten thousand layoffs. Middle managers are right now compliing lists of people who just bought homes or just re-financed. Hey, Bob over there just got a new car! Oh yeah, he's out with the first group.

    Layoffs for all! Bonuses and parties for the rest! THERE'S CAKE IN THE CONFERENCE ROOM!

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  5. Re:Would you call this fruition?! by cubicledrone · · Score: 2, Funny

    Close to 9,000 jobs, or about 10% of the companies' workforce will lose their jobs as a result of the merger.

    Any MOTHER FUCKING QUESTIONS?

    Thank you.

    --
    Business isn't willing to pay for products, innovation and careers, so we get brands, mortgage commercials and layoffs.
  6. Try Alcacent sir by zappepcs · · Score: 2, Funny

    The cure for all your telecommunications heartburn or upset stomach ???

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  7. Alcatel and Lucent to Merge, form Voltron by Gothmolly · · Score: 2, Funny

    Massive blackhole of suckitude to form, news at 11.

    Lets see, what do these guys do...
    make "winmodems"
    produce crappy PBX hardware
    offer "services" ...
    3) lose money!

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