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Choose Your Own Adventure Books Return

KermodeBear writes "Eight of the original 'Choose Your Own Adventure' books are to be republished this summer. From the Article: 'First published in 1979, the books let readers remix their own stories - and face the consequences. [...] the original titles return to bookstores, revamped with 21st-century references (cell phones!).'" For me, it's all about 1987's Space Vampire , by series originator Edward Packard. "Do you eject the vampire through the airlock?"

14 of 199 comments (clear)

  1. Fighting Fantasy by Andrew+Kismet · · Score: 2, Funny

    I always prefered the "Fighting Fantasy" series by Steve Jackson and Ian Livingston. It was like D&D for people without friends!

    (...or, in my case, D&D for when the group is busy going stupid things like "learning"...)

    1. Re:Fighting Fantasy by raehl · · Score: 4, Funny

      It was like D&D for people without friends!

      What's the other kind of D&D?

  2. These books predicted the Web by AEton · · Score: 4, Funny

    Every time I looked at Hypercard -- and HTML -- I thought "gosh, what an unnecessarily complicated Choose Your Own Adventure Book!"

    "If you look at hard core porn, turn to page 12.

    If you post to Slashdot, turn to page 14."

    --
    We recently had heard in the office over one of the Yellow Machine that's made by Anthology Solutions.
  3. EJECT! by iGN97 · · Score: 5, Funny
    "Do you eject the vampire through the airlock?"


    If yes is wrong, I don't want to be right.
  4. My Favorite One by wan-fu · · Score: 5, Funny

    [Page 3]
    To read the article on "Choose Your Own Adventure Books" turn to page 117.

    [Page 117]
    Nothing for you to see here. Please move along.

    You have died.
    The End

    1. Re:My Favorite One by _LMark · · Score: 2, Funny

      This one is rather old, but one of the funniest things I've read on the internets. It's a transcript of a hypothetical version of Adventure, but set in a college dorm.

      College Adventure

      There is a militant lesbian here, blocking your path.
      kick lesbian
      She enjoys it. She points out that you are a fascist sexist bastard.

      --
      'the Internet is right.'
  5. Shamelessly stolen by LaurenBC · · Score: 5, Funny
    A Selection from the Recently Discovered Jack Kerouac Choose-Your-Own-Adventure, Bop Affirmation, c. 1955

    You're trudging in the riverbottom sand when zoooom, there goes a flatbed truck and you're suddenly on the back of the truck with two Nebraska farm boys and you're weeping, "Y-e-e-e-e-e-e-s," yes to the blue swing swing of the Bird, yes to Charlie Parker, that shimmering saxophone, yes to the original mind, yes to this uncompromising romp through the heartland, you who labored on the railroad with crimson sun on your back, you who know the palabra, you who look right into the blowin' breeze and cry and moan and shout

    AND...

    a. Discover a rainbow.
    b. Go off to pick oranges with the Mexican girl.
    c. Sing in a rising crescendo, "Y-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-s."
    from Mcsweeny's
    --
    I don't need this, I've got a Master's Degree in folklore and mythology!
  6. INSIDE URL 13-37 by boomgopher · · Score: 2, Funny

    Pg. 101
    You did not make a choice, or follow any direction, but now, somehow, your are descending from the Internet - approaching a great, glistening website. It is Slashdot - the website of paradise.

    "Welcome!" says the man. "My name is Cmdr Taco. You have reached the forum of joy and beauty. All our treasures are yours to share with us. All of us here are your friends forever."

    THE END

    --
    Your hybrid is not saving the environment. Its purpose is to make you feel good about buying something.
  7. Re:Bookmarks! by Khith · · Score: 2, Funny

    Who *didn't* do this?

  8. Re:"Escape from Fire Island" by Detritus · · Score: 2, Funny
    Homicidal zombie drag queens?

    I don't think we are in Kansas anymore, Toto.

    --
    Mea navis aericumbens anguillis abundat
  9. After Reading several inane comments.... by tpjunkie · · Score: 2, Funny

    You come across a comment that seems to be mysteriously both grammatically correct and adds additional information to the discussion

    If you mod the comment +1, insightful, turn to page 15

    If you suspect the comment of Karma Whoring, mod it -1, overrated, and turn to page 29

    If you were too young to remember CYOA books and the format of this comment confuses you, rate it -1, Offtopic, and turn to page 39.

    If you remember checking each possible result of a decision fork in a CYOA book, check pages 15, 29, and 39, and mod this comment +1, insightful.

  10. Re:Hated them by Jeff+DeMaagd · · Score: 2, Funny

    just a serious of 4-page stories.

    What? Were the stories that serious?

  11. Updated for today's Slashdot crowd by professorfalcon · · Score: 2, Funny

    "Do you eject the Cylon through the airlock?"

  12. Re:Adventures Rule by h4rm0ny · · Score: 2, Funny


    The title of the parchement was XL. So you turned to page 40 (XL in roman numerals.)

    Oh God! I feel so... released! Like an annoying background noise that you'd forgotten was there had just stopped.

    Thank you AC. Thank you soooo much!

    --

    Aide-toi, le Ciel t'aidera - Jeanne D'Arc.