Tech Lobbyist Named to DHS Top Security Post

An anonymous reader writes "Greg Garcia, a lobbyist for the high-tech industry, has been appointed to fill the new assistant secretary post for cyber security and telecommunications at the Department of Homeland Security. Garcia, a VP with the Information Technology Association of America, will try to resuscitate DHS's flagging efforts to formulate a response plan should the nation's key digital assets come under concerted attack or crumble due to some catastrophic failure. DHS is a little late in filling this post: Congress created it 14 months ago after getting fed up with the agency's lack of progress on cyber issues."

Comments

crumble? resuscitate?

[macadamia_harold]

Garcia, a VP with the Information Technology Association of America, will try to resuscitate DHS's flagging efforts to formulate a response plan should the nation's key digital assets come under concerted attack or crumble due to some catastrophic failure.

But what will he do if the tubes become clogged?

Re:crumble? resuscitate?

[Anonymous Coward]

I would guess the tubes have already become clogged with money.

Generally government is swiftest to act when this dangerous situation occurs, and the key words "private-sector participants" imply a problem that could best be solved by giving the excess money to the first insider who takes it.

As a lobbyist, Garcia has the connections and experience to remove this money from the tubes as efficiently as possible, while simultaneously routing future congestion to his selfless corporate backers -- who will willingly burden themselves rather than let end users be inconvenienced by an overabundance of wealth.

Gibson

[SuperBanana]

Greg Garcia, a lobbyist for the high-tech industry, has been appointed to fill the new assistant secretary post for cyber security and telecommunications at the Department of Homeland Security. Garcia, a VP with the Information Technology Association of America, will try to resuscitate DHS's flagging efforts to formulate a response plan should the nation's key digital assets come under concerted attack or crumble due to some catastrophic failure.

Dude. Just put a level 10 firewall around the Gibson, keep a file on all Vanilla Ice wannabees, and have a watchlist for Powerbook Duo owners.

He knows what to do

[JanneM]

Well, as a tech industry veteran, he has the protocol all set:

"Calm down, sir, calm down. Now, a disaster you say? How so? Uh-uh.. Uh-uh... Uh-uh.. Hmm, yes, it sounds like your country is infected with a virus alright, and a nasty one too. Here's what you do: You shut down the country, reinstall the government and then you restart the whole thing from the beginning. That should take care of it. Have a nice day now!"

Great Job, Greggie!

[glomph]

Wow, we are really peeling back the foreskin of quality here. You could probably do better shopping for bureaucrats at Wal-Mart.

Little known fact

[stox]

The Department of Homeland Security was originally created using an alloy of Bureaucratritum and Administrontium. Sadly, the amount of alloy used exceeded the critical mass, resulting in a Black Hole of un-imagined proportions. Our only hope now is to collide the DHS with another Black Hole of unimagined proportions such as the SSA.

Re:By the corporations, for the corporations.

[Anonymous Coward]

Isn't there a saying about a country with a standing army always needing an enemy to fight?

If not... there probably should be ;-)