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New Developments From Microsoft Research
prostoalex writes "Information Week magazine runs a brief report from Microsoft Research, showcasing some of the new technologies the company's research division is working on. Among them — a rootkit that eliminates other rootkits, a firewall that blocks the traffic exploiting published vulnerabilities, a system for catching lost e-mail, a honeypot targeted at discovering zero-day exploits, and some anti-phishing applications."
Who says Microsoft is dying eh? I mean, man, with great ideas like that, how could they ever?
How we know is more important than what we know.
a rootkit that eliminates other rootkits
Yes, but what about rootkits that eliminate rootkits that eliminate other rootkits? Muhahaha
Aww, how could you not trust norton? It slows the fast changing internet world down to much better pace! ;)
"Go into the hall of mirrors and have a bloody hard look at yourself" - HG Nelson
no, no, no, it's much worse than you think. These rootkits are based on virtualization, they install themselves below the kernel. The kernel runs on these rootkits.
How we know is more important than what we know.
> a rootkit that eliminates other rootkits
:P
So being evil installing rootkits is not enough?
One rootkit to rule them all!
How the fuck does email get "lost"? How could that happen? Even a server crash should not cause that.
You don't understand. Microsoft's email servers are more personal than BSD or Linux. Each email is hand scanned and routed. Each packet is individually inspected and if something is wrong, its routed to the appropriate supervisor. There's lots of checks and procedures. This is why Microsoft's mail servers have a more friendly user interface. You get what you pay for.
Boeing cuts reliability and safety funding while Boeing Research announces the availability of individual passenger parachute systems. You can pay Boeing an extra $5 per flight to enable your seat's advanced parachute and fire suppression system. So when the plane falls apart in mid-air or crashes and burns, you survive to fly another day.
Yippee-fucking-do.
It not only creates a seniorweb(tm) as you stated, it's also a security strategy to slow down your PC and use all available memory so you are physically unable to install malware.
Due to Moores law, Norton is required to double the memory and processor use in the same rate processors evolve, by adding *more features*.
I think they've taken the most logical course to build in this security strategy right into the kernel as it has become hard to find additional features to successfully slow down the latest generation of processors.
I think we can keep recursing like this until someone returns 1
So wait, is Microsoft supposed to be the young fit men hunting ghosts or the large, bloated Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man that's unhealthy for the public?
That's nothing, I hear Google invested one Gillion dollars.
Then they'll just come back with a bigger rootkit and eventually a rootkit so big it'll destroy us all.
Stroller.
Yes sir! We use only the finest baby libraries, softely coded and flown from Iraq, cleansed in finest quality norton scanners, lightly killed, and then sealed in a succulent DRM quintuple secure treble virtualized rootkit envelope and lovingly compiled with visual basic.
Steve Milton Ballmer
CEO, Microsoft-Whizzo Corp.
Any sufficiently advanced intelligence is indistinguishable from stupidity.
How the fuck does email get "lost"? How could that happen? Even a server crash should not cause that.
Don't worry. I'm sure that if you ask nicely, the NSA/Homeland Security will give you a copy of your email.
Seven puppies were harmed during the making of this post.
I wrote a shell script that did that years ago. Where can I pick up my Nobel Prize?
One rootkit to rule them all, one rootkit to find them. One rootkit to bring them all and in the kernel bind them.
Geoff, this is the Microsoft Patent Police calling.
Unless you work for Novell, we've got your ass.