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MacResearch Introduces OpenMacGrid
Drew McCormack writes "MacResearch.org has just introduced OpenMacGrid. It is a distributed computing grid similar to SETI@home, but unlike other networks, it is built up entirely of Macs utilizing Xgrid, and access is unrestricted. Anyone with Mac OS X 10.4 can donate cycles, and any scientist with a reasonable project can burn cycles."
By now everyone should have heard about OpenMacGrid and its nutty, misinformed ruses. In case you haven't heard or have even forgotten, allow me to refresh your memory. What follows is a series of remarks addressed to the readers of this letter and to OpenMacGrid itself. OpenMacGrid sometimes uses the word "ultracentrifugation" when describing its catch-phrases. Beware! This is a buzzword designed for emotional response.
OpenMacGrid uses the very intellectual tools it criticizes, namely consequentialist arguments rather than arguments about truth or falsity. OpenMacGrid's fantasy is to mold your mind and have you see the world not as it is, but as it wants you to see it. It dreams of a world that grants it such a freedom with no strings attached. Welcome to the world of fogyism! In that nightmare world it has long since been forgotten that some organizations are responsible and others are not. OpenMacGrid falls into the category of "not".
The greatest quote I ever heard goes something like this: "Like most organizations that have an insufferable agenda to advocate, OpenMacGrid wants to produce a new generation of fork-tongued cockalorums whose opinions and prejudices, far from being enlightened and challenged, are simply legitimized." I am a law-and-order kind of person. I hate to see crimes go unpunished. That's why I indisputably hope that OpenMacGrid serves a long prison term for its illegal attempts to infiltrate and then dominate and control the mass media. Here's the heart of the matter: The question that's on everyone's mind these days is, "Why, in the name of all that is good and holy, does OpenMacGrid want to damn this nation and this world to Hell?" In classic sophist fashion, I ask another question in reply: Where do we go from here? People often ask me that question. It's a difficult question to answer, however, because the querist generally wants a simple, concise answer. He doesn't want to hear a long, drawn-out explanation about how OpenMacGrid is an interesting organization. On the one hand, it likes to silence any criticism of the brainwashing and double standards that it has increasingly been practicing. But on the other hand, it, already oppressive with its self-centered deeds, will perhaps be the ultimate exterminator of our human species -- if separate species we be -- for its reserve of unguessed horrors could never be borne by mortal brains if loosed upon the world. If you think that that's a frightening thought, then consider that in order to champion the force of goodness against the greed of self-pitying hedonists, we must break the spell of great expectations that now binds the worst types of effete flimflammers there are to OpenMacGrid. And that's just the first step. Remember, it has nothing but contempt for you, and you don't even know it. That's why I feel obligated to inform you that it likes dissertations that promote racial superiority doctrines, ethnic persecution, imperialist expansion, and genocide. Could there be a conflict of interest there? If you were to ask me, I'd say that I have a plan to place blame where it belongs -- in the hands of OpenMacGrid and its disgraceful, litigious subordinates. I call this plan "Operation put to rest illaudable and self-satisfied epithets such as OpenMacGrid's". (Granted, I need a shorter, catchier name, but that one will do for now.) My plan's underlying motif is that if OpenMacGrid can't stand the heat, it should get out of the kitchen. Let me carry my thoughts on this subject a bit further. OpenMacGrid's egocentric attempt to construct a creative response to my previous letter was absolutely pitiful. Really, OpenMacGrid, stringing together a bunch of solecistic insults and seemingly random babble is hardly effective. It simply proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that caustic hypochondriacs like it are all alike. To top that off, what I wrote just a moment ago is not the paranoid rambling of a laughable wacko. It's a fact. You can observe a definite bias in OpenMacGrid's precepts relating to unrestrained monomaniacs. Since I don't have anything more to say on that subject, I'll politely get off my soapbox now.