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Research Reveals Mislaid Microprocessor Megahertz

Posted by CmdrTaco on from the are-we-there-yet dept.

SlashRating© 6*10^23 slashdottit! tm ransom1982 noted a new article on The Register that says "Not only are chip companies regularly releasing ever-faster microprocessors, but new research has revealed that modern CPUs actually lose megahertz over time." This makes it even more complicated to compare the performance of Intel and AMD CPUs since you have differing architecture, clockspeeds AND the year of manufacture to consider. Buyer beware!

14 of 99 comments (clear)

  1. The sad thing is... by Khaed · · Score: 4, Funny

    This one wouldn't surprise me if it turned out to be true, because sometimes I certainly feel like my processor is degrading...

    1. Re:The sad thing is... by ColdWetDog · · Score: 5, Funny
      You computer guys are all alike. No balls. We car guys don't whine about our wheels going slower, we just get out the drill and polish and start working. The trick is to take weight off the vehicle by drilling out any unnecessary metal. That's called "adding lightness".

      Even geeky guys can do this. And you don't need a real drill, just a dremel tool. Just start drilling holes in those IC's, you soon see the flames roar out! Smoke! Speed!

      Works like a charm. Even works for Windows.

      --
      Faster! Faster! Faster would be better!
    2. Re:The sad thing is... by Sigma+7 · · Score: 3, Funny

      This one wouldn't surprise me if it turned out to be true, because sometimes I certainly feel like my processor is degrading...


      It is true. Processors don't live forever, and will eventually die from entropy - hence some retailers and manufacturer's selling extended warranties to cover the period between 1-3 years where it's not likely to have noticable problems.

      The rate at which Mhzs are lost does vary - if you run DOS, you can be sure that MHzs would be working at optimum capacity as there's isn't more than 1 task wearing away the ability of the processor.

      When the processor malfunctions or finally dies, that means it's lost too many MHzs to contine operating. It may simply stop working, develop the Pentium division bug (or some other interesting event), or some other symptom. Some people compensated by overclocking the chip to recover these MHz - but removing the heat sink caused these MHz to spew out so rapidly that it blew a hole in the mainboard.

    3. Re:The sad thing is... by hahiss · · Score: 2, Funny

      I just added pin-stripes and a big-ass wing instead. . . .

      Oh, and speed holes. Lots and lots of speed holes.

      --
      "Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under." - H.L. Mencken
    4. Re:The sad thing is... by Smidge204 · · Score: 4, Funny

      Yeah, they just don't build 'em like they used to. I remember when I got my first Pentium system back in the late 1990s, the cache pipeline burst and I spent that whole evening picking bits out of the carpet.

      =Smidge=

    5. Re:The sad thing is... by Khaed · · Score: 2, Funny

      (AOLer) I don't know what my ceiling fan has to do with it, but okay... (/AOLer)

  2. Is this another April fool's story? by andy314159pi · · Score: 4, Funny

    I'm too dumb to figure out if this is an April fools joke or not.

    1. Re:Is this another April fool's story? by metlin · · Score: 2, Funny

      Well, who cares.

      I think we should celebrate - this is the only way we'd see the word laid in any on the front page of Slashdot.

    2. Re:Is this another April fool's story? by skoaldipper · · Score: 2, Funny

      "Research Reveals Mislaid Microprocessor Megahertz"

      For a brief second there, I thought MIT introduced their first prototype for the Fembot Miss Universe competition in 2010.

      --
      I hope, when they die, cartoon characters have to answer for their sins.
    3. Re:Is this another April fool's story? by Brandybuck · · Score: 2, Funny

      I'm still amazed they can count the number of molecules in a mole. Does it throw the count off if the moles poop halfway through?

      --
      Don't blame me, I didn't vote for either of them!
  3. El Reg at the weekend? by jd3nn1s · · Score: 4, Funny

    To me the giveaway was El Reg posting new articles at the weekend :)

  4. Re:HAHAHA by linvir · · Score: 2, Funny

    Nerd sarcasm, a formidable species of non-humour, but it only unleashes the full extent of its pathetic failure when the user accidentally makes a dick of himself by revealing laughable misconceptions through implication. In this case, we can see that this particular subject has somehow convinced himself both that Slashdot is intended to be "useful" and my mom got scared and said "You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air". I whistled for a cab and when it came near, the license plate said "FRESH" and it had dice in the mirror.

    If anything I could say that this cab was rare but I thought "Nah, forget it". "Yo homes, to Bel Air!". I pulled up to a house about seven or eight, and I yelled to the cabbie "Yo homes, smell ya' later!". I looked at my kingdom, I was finally there, to sit on my throne as the prince of Bel Air.

  5. Hey it works! by EmbeddedJanitor · · Score: 4, Funny
    I thought parent was posting bullshit, but though what the heck let's try this.... except I didn't want to screw up hardware so I thought I'd take a stab at lightening Windows. I went into the Windows directory and truncated a few DLLs to make them lighter.

    Well who would have expected it... Windows BSODs much faster than it used to!

    --
    Engineering is the art of compromise.
  6. Obligatory Joke by Tesla+Tank · · Score: 2, Funny

    What happens if Chuck Norris punches you?

    Megahertz!