Safemedia's CEO Tells Congress He Can Stop P2P

palewook writes "Yesterday, Safwat Fahmy appeared in front of the House Science and Technology Committee. During Fahmy's testimony [PDF], he claimed Safemedia's "P2P Disaggregator" technology uses traffic-shaping systems and network-filtering systems that can destroy contaminated P2P networks. And their Clouseau product will make it impossible to send or receive any illegal P2P transmission on any installed network. However, Clouseau allows tunneling and SSH and never opens packets to determine file legality."

Comments

'Bout time!

[cowscows]

Awesome! When he's finished with that, he can stop the AIDS epidemic in Africa, and stabilize Iraq. Then maybe next summer he can finally get that space elevator built using all the energy from the fusion power plant his company has just finished perfecting.

Re:'Bout time!

[QuantumRiff]

Cmon, This is just a software company.. they can't do all that.. but I heard they will ship Duke Nukem Forever by Christmas...

Re:'Bout time!

[cayenne8]

"I think while we're at it we should outlaw sporks since I might gouge my eyes out in a senseless act of violence. In fact, maybe we should just outlaw all computers, that'd stop copyright infringement right?"

Not to worry. I'm immediately at work now, to invent a Cato program, that will periodically, and without warning...repeatedly attack his program.

Re:'Bout time!

[vegetablespork]

I think while we're at it we should outlaw sporks . . .

I oppose.

Huh

[Greyfox]

Isn't lying to Congress illegal?

Re:Huh

[Adult film producer]

"Isn't lying to Congress illegal?"

I'm sorry but I dont recall.

Re:Huh

[Estanislao Mart�nez]

Isn't lying to Congress illegal?

Who cares? Just believe what you say. You do want it to be true, don't you? Well, with a little bit of a perfectly ordinary technique known as "wishful thinking," your wishes can come true, as far as your belief in them is concerned!

You get to reap all of the benefits of sincerity, too.

Re:Huh

[stuntpope]

Unless the President has full faith and confidence in you.

Re:Huh

[rubycodez]

getting caught lying to Congress without paying requisite bribes and campaign contributions is illegal

Re:Huh

[miskatonic alumnus]

That depends on what the definition of "is" is.

Re:Huh

[Baddas]

Pardon?

I bet ...

[Anonymous Coward]

the traffic shaping just looks for the 'Evil Bit' set in the TCP header

Re:Hmmm.

[Anonymous Coward]

Look at AACS? Weren't they going to end movie piracy? How's that workin' for them?

AACS is an impenetrable fortress, standing against the efforts of our piratical enemies! Do not listen to reports that our encryption has been breached. Like golden armor, our DRM will never be broached, never tarnish, and never fail. These movie pirates will surrender or die. They will surrender, it is they who will surrender!

- Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf,
AACS Information Minister

Re:Clouseau? What an odd choice for names.

[sopuli]

I heard that during his testimony Fahmy's left eye kept blinking uncontrollably and that at one point, while raving about Clouseau, he absentmindedly amputated his pinky while toying with his Leatherman.

Re:Clouseau? What an odd choice for names.

[Groovus]

No kidding. I also find the irony of naming a tool for stopping copyright infringement after a fictional character from a movie/cartoon series which I'm surprised isn't trademarked in some way somewhat delicious.

I guess it's a better name than Dreyfus though?

Typo

[Bob9113]

Typo in parent:

Isn't lying to Congress illegal?

It's a French word, easy to misspell. The correct spelling is, "de rigueur."

Re:Selling Congress snakeoil

[toleraen]

Wow, you're mother sounds kinda geeky. Does that mean she lives in her own basement?

Joke?

[locokamil]

The folks over at Freedom to Tinker seem to think Safemedia is an elaborate hoax.

On the other hand, its CEO is testifying in front of Congress...

Re:Winning in Iraq

[tuxic]

I think you will find a genetic connection between P2P users and Swedes, to some extent, since a lot of people ... err, chefs? ;) .. up here, happily ignore peer to peer filesharing prohibitions, and they also aren't afraid of having FBI agents knocking on their doors if they do it, because:

A) there are no FBI agents knocking on people's doors here
B) if there had been, they would be sliced in a claim of self-defense by the almighty chef's kitchen knives
C) knocked down on the floor by blue-eyed women's big natural boobs

Remember, resistance is futile! Borg, the tennis player, will defeat the agents!

Swedes aren't crazy.. wuhahahaha! Vi är inte galna, vi är smarta människor med högt intellekt!

Okay, sorry. Couldn't resist. Mod me down all you want *hides in the corner of shame*