Outfitting a Brand New Datacenter?

An anonymous reader writes "We completed our new 4,000 sq. ft. data center (Tier II/III, according to The Uptime Institute) and just recently moved our core systems from our old data center to the new. We've been up and running for several months now and I'm preparing to close out the project. The last piece is to purchase some accessories and tools for the new location. The short list so far consists of a Server Lift, a few extra floor tile pullers, flashlights and a crash cart. We'll also add to the tools in the toolbox located in one of the auxiliary rooms — these things seem to have legs! What are we missing? Where can we find crash carts set up more for a data center environment (beyond the utility cart with and LCD, keyboard, and mouse strapped to it)?"

Comments

hmmm

[Anonymous Coward]

You will probably need a series of tubes.

I would suggest...

[mdenham]

...a time machine, preferably in a Faraday cage (to shield your data center from unwanted interference), so you can implement the necessary changes a couple of months ago.

Monkey

[Rinisari]

You need a monkey. Why? If a monkey can manage to bring down even a single server, you've not secured the place enough.

Re:Monkey

[Anonymous Coward]

speaking of which, I am willing to relocate for the right price.

I am guaranteed to:

1. get pizza grease in the keyboards
2. turn up the heat during winter
3. play with water balloons in the summer
4. take the forklifts for joy rides
5. let birds in
6. use the meeting room to play video games (projectors rock)
7. dual boot (everything) into a beowolf running windows on xen displayed in the meeting room so I can play super mario on my nintendo emulator (really fast like)
8. label cables incorrectly
9. lose tools
10. replace them with metric/english
11. write a virus that downloads porn and puts it on the ceo's desktop
12. write infinite loops until everything grinds to a staggering halt.
13. and ultimately take credit for everything so long as it doesn't involve criminal charges

So, when you notice your project starts taking a turn for the worse, go ahead and call:
Crippled Monkey Consulting
1-800-fling-poo
rates are lower than ever at $300/hr, so act fast.

References include:

• nasa
• fermilab
• novel
• microsoft
• the bush administration
• IBM
• and many, many others, feel free to ask for a full portfolio

Gear you should have off site

[Doctor Memory]

• Electric drill (large, 1/2" or better) with appropriate bits
• Bolt cutters
• Oxy-acetylene cutting torch or plasma cutter
• Det cord (Primacord 5 or equiv.) (10 ft.)
• Semtex or C4 in 1/2kg packages (doz.)
• Blasting caps (box)
• Thermite (1/2kg)
• Safety goggles

For those times when the internal security system is working, but not according to spec...

Re:Gear you should have off site

[TheLink]

Also might come in handy when Skynet goes online.

You missed out stuff like the shotgun though ;).

A must...

[bky1701]

Would be a middle-aged Scottish man to sit in the middle of it with an intercom to say "She canna' take it any more!" when usage gets high.

With all the good suggestions already out

[Seakip18]

I'd suggest extreme emergency supplies for situations where extra cables and backup supplies will prove fruitless.
This includes, but not limited to:
A bottle of whisky
A bottle of scotch
A glass
A Shotgun, pref with ammo
Sleeping pills
Pep pills....

In all seriousness, a good first aid kit should be in the center. Nothing sucks more than a dull headache and not having any asprin for it.
Plus, when someone cuts their hand on a server rack, it'll patch their hands up to keep them from bleeding all over them.

Re:Gear you should have on site

[sumdumass]

Surprisingly, I used to work with a guy who always joked about using a hammer to fix the computers. It scared a lot of the users because he actually carries it around with him and after fixing something he would drop a small piece of metal on the floor and strike it making it look like he hit the computer.

You should see the look of horror on the users face when he did this. Management used to ask me if it was proper and I would tell them he was the senior tech so it must be. But it was hilarious to me.

Unfortunately, some people actually got the Idea that you could hit or kick the computers to get them running right so we had to let everyone in one the joke.

Re:Don't guess!

[gbjbaanb]

Think you're all set? Now, using ONLY the tools on ONE crash cart, put the rack back together. With the power out. (i.e. no mains)

"ok, we've got every tool known to man, now hit the power - lets run the disaster recovery drill."

"umm... we did buy a torch, didn't we?...."

Re: Tarps

[dpilot]

Heck, my office is under the cafeteria. Forget plain old water, how about a soup spill (minor quantities, but messy) or a dishwasher malfunction? (major quantities, almost as messy, per litre.)