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The Quest For Glory

What happens when you take the dour attitude and put-upon demeanor of an RPG NPC to the mean streets of ... Bath, England? Rock, Paper, Shotgun highlights John Walker's attempt to get the good citizens of Bath to do a quest for a kindly old wizard. As you can imagine, hilarity ensues. "In this time of rejection, I did learn a few useful things, however. Older people are much less likely to see the funny side of something, even when the safety of the universe is in the balance. Couples are far better at avoiding the magically hindered than individuals. Men with grey beards really don't like to be called, 'fellow wizard.' (Although, their wives are likely to find it funny.) And then, hope was restored in the form of a man in his 40s. His reaction was certainly the most peculiar of the day. He resigned himself to helping me as if he had to. Could this man have been a true adventurer? Someone who is aware of the demands of being a hero? Perhaps his acquiescent attitude was due to the low level of the quest, and the relatively poor reward for a man of such experience. But something about the simplicity of the task, and the accompanying XP, must have been enough."

35 comments

  1. wtf? by xhrit · · Score: 1, Informative

    this is like 2 years old. and not very funny.

  2. Well, color me amazed by PlatyPaul · · Score: 1

    Crazy old guy talking to random people... I'm surprised no-one handed him a sandwich or tried to give him their change.

    --
    Misery loves company. Online misery loves unsuspecting random strangers.
  3. Confusing subject by PlatyPaul · · Score: 4, Insightful

    I was thinking of that other Quest for Glory....

    --
    Misery loves company. Online misery loves unsuspecting random strangers.
    1. Re:Confusing subject by musikit · · Score: 1

      aye me as well. for a second i thought someone had the money to buy the IP from sierra or they grew a pair of spheres.

    2. Re:Confusing subject by Sp0r · · Score: 1

      I second this confusion, and miss QFG.

      --
      I am Sp0r, Scourge of the Cosmos!
    3. Re:Confusing subject by etherlad · · Score: 2, Informative

      AGD Interactive (formerly Tierra Games) is still working on their VGA remake of Quest for Glory II: Trial by Fire.

      They've vaguely confirmed that it'll be done before summer next year. Or maybe it was before spring?

      --
      Soylens viridis homines es
    4. Re:Confusing subject by magisterx · · Score: 1

      As did I. Those were my favorite video games when I was child, and Quest For Glory III is probably my favorite video game of all time. They combined humor, adventure, and a sense of exploration that especially appealed to me when I was younger.

  4. sad by nategoose · · Score: 0

    I thought that this was gonna have more to do with the Quest for Glory series by Sierra :-(

  5. Although I loathe to say it... by GammaKitsune · · Score: 1

    Jesus riding a dinosaur.

    --
    Gamertag: WyleType
    1. Re:Although I loathe to say it... by kalirion · · Score: 1

      Since I doubt Jesus ever actually rode a dinosaur, such an occurance would definitely be newsworthy.

  6. No Surprise by powerlord · · Score: 1

    Hmmm after reading the article, is it any surprise that only some relative newbies would be willing to do a simple Fed-Ex quest? (the only ones who seemed to help were a couple of girls in their 20s)

    I suspect that the other adventurers were merely on their way to a higher XP area/quest to complete. :P

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    This space for rent. All reasonable inquiries will be entertained at proprietors discretion.
  7. I have to do it... by pieaholicx · · Score: 2, Funny

    LFM!

    --
    http://blog.heavensdomain.net
  8. The Escapist, January 2006 by oneiros27 · · Score: 2, Informative

    Looks to be word for word from the older article:

    http://www.escapistmagazine.com/issue/30/25

    Although, I did find it amusing ... the first time.

    --
    Build it, and they will come^Hplain.
    1. Re:The Escapist, January 2006 by sholden · · Score: 1, Insightful

      really?

      "Below is the story of my adventure, originally published on The Escapist, and now in its full glory for you, today" didn't give that away?

  9. mistake by ILuvRamen · · Score: 0

    He said nobody came up to him asking for a quest then mentioned that he failed to hang a yellow exclamation mark over his head. Well duh, even I would have walked up and talked to a guy dressed as a wizard with a yellow exclamation mark over his head. That's practically an internationally recognized common symbol.

    --
    Google's Super Secret Search Algorithm: SELECT @search_results FROM internet WHERE @search_results = 'good'
  10. The scientific process by ApharmdB · · Score: 4, Funny

    And if one thing should be taken from this experience, above anything else, should the fate of the universe ever be in your hands, only bother to seek the aid of girls under the age of 30.

    Finally, an explanation for the convention of magical girls. The scientific process truly is amazing. After all, without experimenting such as this chap has, who would have believed all of the anime telling us that young women are the only ones capable of saving the universe?

  11. Ah, so that's why! by Chemisor · · Score: 2, Funny

    I used to wonder why we have all these people standing around in adventure games, offering quests to anybody who asks for them. Now we know that those people are still standing there because nobody but you, dear player, is willing to do their quests. And if their lines seem repetetive and stale it's only because they have had to say them so many times to indifferent adventurers who do not want a quest. This is indeed surprising, considering the amount of experience points and valuable enchanted objects that can be obtained only that way.

  12. Incidentally by DrYak · · Score: 3, Informative

    incidentally, although the original QfG was heavily RPG influenced, you didn't get random people you bumped into ask for your help.

    In a little bit realistic manner :
    - Random people you bumped into either tried to avoid you (citizens in QfG 2) or did tell you to move along and mind you're business (Sherif and several other caracters in QfG 1, most guards in QfG 2).
    - Most people didn't spontaneously ask for your help, you had to search what quest are available (sort of classified ads in the hero guild in QfG 1) or try to imagine what people might need and spontaneously provide it to them (various caracters in QfG2 would tell you about legends or about ressource that aren't availble easily anymore)
    - You had to insist and talk people into trusting you (the separated couple of QfG 4).
    - Only very near to the end of the game by the time supposedly everyone has heard of your performance someone desperate may come and directly talk to you.

    But the difference is that QfG series of games where primary Adventure Games with RPG elements thrown in and thus benefit from the usual characteristic of those categories (well written story telling as most games from Lucas Art and Sierra, as opposed to long chain of bring object A to person B à-la-Zelda and Link)

    PS: Works nice with FreeSCI...

    --
    "Sufficiently advanced satire is indistinguishable from reality." - [Tips: 1DrYakQDKCQ6y52z6QbnkxHXAocMZJE61o ]
    1. Re:Incidentally by zullnero · · Score: 1

      Bah, the series died when they got rid of the command line translator and the old EGA graphics. They only made the first two that way. I learned how to type "climb tree" and "throw rock" SO fast, it scared people.

    2. Re:Incidentally by Chmcginn · · Score: 1

      Yeah, but even the first two (Hero's Quest, later Quest for Glory) missed the fun of the earlier Sierra games - I remember the original (PC Jr!) version of King's Quest, and how it wouldn't even pause for typing. That made for some interesting moments...

      --
      Have you been touched by his noodly appendage?
    3. Re:Incidentally by lkeagle · · Score: 1

      That was true all the way up to the first edition of Kings Quest 4.

      It was only after the KQ4 update patch (for machines with 512kb of RAM!!!!) that they added in the prompt window that paused the game while typing. Before that you had to make judicious use of pretyping a command, and using F2 to repeat it quickly.

  13. Sadly things went awry... by Psychor · · Score: 1

    Things became problematic after a passer-by tried to kill him to see how much faction he gave with the legion of darkness.

    1. Re:Sadly things went awry... by fatboyslack · · Score: 1

      ha! I lol'd @ the parent.

      WoW jokes will be with us for a long time.

      --
      Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself. -- Leo Tolstoy
  14. You guys are so uncool by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    You don't realize that the comedy was in his coming up with this idea, and putting it into effect. It's the juxtaposition of the fun gaming world onto boring reality that made this worthwhile. It was his quest for the day.

    How the people reacted is quite irrelevant, and totally predictable. But who cares.

    I guess you're all just too jaded. Or you need a laughter track.

  15. I'm off to Bath by SurturZ · · Score: 4, Funny

    I've booked a flight to Bath so I can farm this guy for chocolate coins.

    1. Re:I'm off to Bath by fatboyslack · · Score: 1

      But then you would be in England!

      --
      Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself. -- Leo Tolstoy
    2. Re:I'm off to Bath by KillerBob · · Score: 2, Funny

      And dangerously close to a Bath. Good god, man... you're a Geek. Show some pride.

      --
      If you believe everything you read, you'd better not read. - Japanese proverb
  16. FedE->x by tepples · · Score: 1

    Hmmm after reading the article, is it any surprise that only some relative newbies would be willing to do a simple Fed-Ex quest? It depends: Have the newbies seen or not seen the negative-space white arrow in the logo of FedEx?
  17. That's odd by Nazlfrag · · Score: 4, Funny

    Whenever I put on my robe and wizard hat, all the young girls run screaming.

    1. Re:That's odd by Dreetje · · Score: 1

      Whenever I put on my robe and wizard hat, all the young girls run screaming.
      I guess the deal is that you should have black hair and glasses to fetch the interest of young girls. Of course, if you can play a good game of Quidditch that scores extra points!
      --
      Dre
    2. Re:That's odd by LingNoi · · Score: 1

      That's because you don't wear anything else!!

  18. More boobs! Re:Confusing subject by Ang31us · · Score: 1

    I played all of the games in the series, but only finished 1 - 4. I did not play part 5 for more than 30 minutes...it did not do anything for me.

    My personal favorites were the re-make of "Quest for Glory 1: So you want to be a hero?" and "Quest for Glory 4: Shadows of Darkness." I truly enjoyed my nightly rendezvous with Katrina, especially after she had taken off her cloak and exposed her round, soft, delectable breasts.

  19. Re:More boobs! Re:Confusing subject by Moridineas · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I agree--QfG1 remake and 4 were my favorite...5 was so terrible, felt like a slap in the face!

    You might want to check out Tierra's remake of QfG2 -- looks like it should be fun. Also, QfG 4.5 is a fan made game that gives an interesting take on the series!

  20. Re:More boobs! Re:Confusing subject by Ang31us · · Score: 1

    Thanks for the information...I really had no idea about the re-make or parody.

    Looks like Tierra changed their name to AGD Interactive and the Quest for Glory 2 remake is a work in progress.

    I'll probably download QfG 4.5 to see how good the spoof of part 1 is.

  21. In other news... by Khuffie · · Score: 1

    ...if you wanna meet nice young girls, put on a robe and wizard hat and offer them a random quest. Gotcha!