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High Earning Spammers Face Tougher Sentences

Posted by samzenpus on from the let-the-punishment-fit-the-crime dept.

netbuzz writes "More big-time spammers may find themselves doing longer stretches behind bars if a federal judge's first-of-its-kind sentencing decision in a Denver case becomes widely applied. In a sense, these spammers would be hoisted on their own profits, as language in CAN-SPAM allows the use of their profits instead of the difficult-to-measure financial damage they cause in establishing a prison sentence. The Denver spammer earned $250,000 — and a 20% longer prison stint — using this approach."

8 of 157 comments (clear)

  1. "Hoisted on their own profits" by base3 · · Score: 4, Funny

    is nice, but until they're hoisted on a gallows (or facing a firing squad, in a pinch), it's not quite good enough, but a step in the right general direction. Hang 'em high--after all, they can then say their penis pills caused them to he hung (yeah, hanged, I know, I know).

    --
    One CPU cycle wasted on digital restrictions management is ONE TOO MANY.
    1. Re:"Hoisted on their own profits" by beadfulthings · · Score: 2, Funny

      Rather than hanging, I'd say put the guilty in a room for fifteen minutes with a group of e-mail administrators, network managers, IT security pukes, and assorted other sufferers. These folks would be drawn from a pool of all available qualified persons. (We'd have to work out the details of the selection process, but that shouldn't be too hard.) The only rule would be that the spammer couldn't be killed. I have occasionally wondered what I would do if introduced to a notorious spammer. Leap out of my chair and attempt to claw his eyes out? Aim a well-placed kick at some sensitive area? Find some weapon to use to bash his skull in? Or just sit there and say, "You idiot! Why?"

      (I didn't think your post was offtopic. I thought it was funny.)

      --
      "Here's what's happening. You're starting to drive like your Dad..." - Red Green
    2. Re:"Hoisted on their own profits" by MicktheMech · · Score: 2, Funny

      I assume you're talking about those very important "forward this to 10 other people or you will die in seven days" e-mails. Life and death indeed.

  2. Suitable punishment by Scareduck · · Score: 4, Funny

    Penis enlargement, the hard way, i.e., using a come-along.

    --

    Dog is my co-pilot.

    1. Re:Suitable punishment by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      The best punishment is 25 years on viagra in a solitary cell.

  3. In a perfect world... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    In a perfect world spammers would get caught, go to jail, and share a cell with too many men who have enlarged their penises, taken Viagra and are looking for a new relationship.

  4. Re:Can you say screwed? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    ARGH! CHOCK! The word is CHOCK! CHOCK FULL of Viagra.

  5. Re:One Solution by Rod+Beauvex · · Score: 4, Funny

    Only in America can someone with the last name 'SWINDLE' get appointed to something called the Federal TRADE Commission.