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Microsoft's "Source Fource" Action Figures
RCanine writes "Microsoft is attempting to curry mind share with the 3-12 age bracket with their new event, the Source Fource, a series of developer-based action figures. Windows Vista Sensei, SQL Server Gal and some lame gender stereotypes presumably seek to rid the world of bearded, katana-wielding evil-doers. From the article: 'Between March 15th and April 15th 2007, the new super dudette will be offered and will be sent to developers who get their act together and attend at least two live MSDN Webcasts or two MSDN Virtual Labs, or one of each.'" I just can't figure out what to make of this, except that I hope someone can tell me if it blends. Or melts. Or burns.
This is a sure sign of the apocalypse...
SQL Server Gal is hot! Is she single?!
They MUST start making some "evil villian" models too. One that looks like RMS. I'll buy a dozen!
Let me guess.
Are the nemeses of these characters 'Evil Dr Torvalds' and 'The Jobs Bandit', who are intent on overtaking the world with their clone armies of penguins, platypuses and scary Finder icons?
Those using pirated Tinysoft signatures(TM) are a real threat to society and should all be thrown in jail.
The best part is when you click "Watch Them in Action!" and it takes you to a page.
.tv sites really. Does Microsoft utilize any of those freely available options? Oh no, of course not! YouTube is Google! Even if we don't have a competing solution we must not use theirs!
.asx file all you non-Windows users.
... must be his hair. Well, we'll see about that! Put the action figures I've hand crafted here immediately into production! Release plush dolls of clippy! Find me puppies to carry around with me at press conferences and when their cute factor falls below 40%, have them killed and replaced!
Now, a lot of sites have this crazy idea of embedded video that streams from a site or source that's dedicated to streaming video. You know like YouTube, Blip.tv or any of the
So what happens when you click "view"? Well, it creates a popup window that opens up Windows Media Player! Good luck viewing a
The least Microsoft could do is create their own streaming video server but, alas, we must revert to our archaic mentality, reject all that is sensible and invade my privacy and comfort zone by automatically opening a program that is tied to the kernel (and at least historically had admin rights when I didn't) sitting in kernel land on my computer.
Assistant: Mr. Ballmer! Research indicates that Richard Stallman is 50% more cuddly than you!
Ballmer: Damnit
My work here is dung.
From the website:
He is highly thought of as one of the most powerful warriors alive. Although he is still young, Windows Vista Sensei is said to possess different strengths and confidence not known to anyone. He is already beginning to gain such world fame at his young age that folks are writing stories about him.
That's quite some selective perception, I can't even believe this is real!!
Super-Sweaty Ballmer! Now with Mega-Chair-Throwing action (TM)! Pull the string and hear Super-Sweaty Ballmer say one of the following action phrases:
- "Developers! Developers! Developers!"
- "Woooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!"
- "I'm going to f**king KILL Google!"
Supplies are limited, so place your order now!
____
~ |rip/\/\aster /\/\onkey
Thank you Microsoft, for setting your people back 1000 years.
Absolute power corrupts absolutely. indymedia
I think I speak for everyone here when I say: Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot. Over.
dragonhawk@iname.microsoft.com
I do not like Microsoft. Remove them from my email address.
No, I'm actually motivated by lunch. And learning, too. But lunch is a priority.
Onda Technology Institute
...because you know Source Fource is out to beat the Penguin.
I swear to God...I swear to God! That is NOT how you treat your human!
Those of us into customizing our own action figures can simply paint a necktie onto a Dr. Evil figure that's been dipped into thin chicken broth.
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