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Microsoft's "Source Fource" Action Figures

RCanine writes "Microsoft is attempting to curry mind share with the 3-12 age bracket with their new event, the Source Fource, a series of developer-based action figures. Windows Vista Sensei, SQL Server Gal and some lame gender stereotypes presumably seek to rid the world of bearded, katana-wielding evil-doers. From the article: 'Between March 15th and April 15th 2007, the new super dudette will be offered and will be sent to developers who get their act together and attend at least two live MSDN Webcasts or two MSDN Virtual Labs, or one of each.'" I just can't figure out what to make of this, except that I hope someone can tell me if it blends. Or melts. Or burns.

49 of 363 comments (clear)

  1. For the love of... by x3rc3s · · Score: 5, Funny

    This is a sure sign of the apocalypse...

    1. Re:For the love of... by Pvt_Ryan · · Score: 4, Insightful

      I am actually crying.. I mean reading MS's superhero page actually brought tears to my eyes.
      I think I have lost the will to live.

      That HAS to be the most depressing and pathetic thing I have seen in years.

      Maybe the big bad penguin TUX will be the evil genius that is trying to lure potential windows developers away, and the new "superheroes" will rally to their aid.

      Its not even 1700 and after reading that I need a drink..

    2. Re:For the love of... by HTH+NE1 · · Score: 4, Insightful

      I like how they're the "Fource" because there's seven of them.

      --
      Oh, say does that Star-Spangled Banner entwine / The myrtle of Venus with Bacchus's vine?
  2. Hmm... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    SQL Server Gal is hot! Is she single?!

    1. Re:Hmm... by somersault · · Score: 3, Funny

      I was hoping that she'd be hawt, but then it turned out that she's the demon heck-spawn of a block of lego and that big sleeping Pokemon dude.. :s

      --
      which is totally what she said
    2. Re:Hmm... by Hoi+Polloi · · Score: 5, Funny
      --
      It is by the juice of the coffee bean that thoughts acquire speed, the teeth acquire stains. The stains become a warning
    3. Re:Hmm... by Lemmy+Caution · · Score: 5, Funny

      I am not going to make an SQL Injection joke. No. I am not.

    4. Re:Hmm... by xSauronx · · Score: 5, Funny

      If you don't want to say "hell" you can substitute "Detroit"

      --
      By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. -- George Carlin
    5. Re:Hmm... by Viceroy+Potatohead · · Score: 5, Funny

      Don't forget Professor Oppensource, with his evil creations! Give him a monocle and a Nazi armband, with the Firefox logo instead of a swastika. Lesser villains such as Dr. Oppenoffis could be thwarted by the team's pet Oox,Mel. If MS is going to implement the gayest idea ever, they might as well go all the way.

    6. Re:Hmm... by egomaniac · · Score: 4, Funny

      If you don't want to say "hell" you can substitute "Detroit"

      Hey hey hey, there are kids reading this. You know you can't say words like "Detroit" in polite company! Now go wash your mouth out with soap, young man!

      --
      ZFS: because love is never having to say fsck
    7. Re:Hmm... by ivansanchez · · Score: 4, Funny

      > Is she single?! I guess she has lots of foreign relationships...

    8. Re:Hmm... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Belgium, man. Belgium.

    9. Re:Hmm... by ultranova · · Score: 4, Funny

      SQL Server Gal is hot! Is she single?!

      No, but she isn't big on limiting access - hell, that's the name of her little sister. However, as a result she has worms, bugs, and viruses. Use virus protection if you want to mess with her, and remember: she charges for the "fun", unless you meet her at a shady BitTorrent server somewhere.

      --

      Forget magic. Any technology distinguishable from divine power is insufficiently advanced.

    10. Re:Hmm... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      I will then.

      I would inject her then 9 months later watch her drop her tables. If you know what I mean.

    11. Re:Hmm... by $RANDOMLUSER · · Score: 5, Funny

      I will, in return, refrain from making any "back-door vulnerability" jokes.

      --
      No folly is more costly than the folly of intolerant idealism. - Winston Churchill
    12. Re:Hmm... by Mister+Whirly · · Score: 5, Funny

      ""she also likes Sex in the City". I don't know that show. I know of Sex and the City, a show popular with her type"

      They are not talking about the television show. She is just a slut.

      --
      "But this one goes to 11!"
  3. Oooo, Ooooo, Oooo!!!!!! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    They MUST start making some "evil villian" models too. One that looks like RMS. I'll buy a dozen!

    1. Re:Oooo, Ooooo, Oooo!!!!!! by esocid · · Score: 4, Funny

      They do. I think I saw a penguin on there.

      --
      Absolute power corrupts absolutely. indymedia
    2. Re:Oooo, Ooooo, Oooo!!!!!! by skuzzlebutt · · Score: 4, Funny

      I just got a picture of a panel with the nefarious villain BSOD laying on top of the Vista Sensie smacking the piss out of him...the bloodied superhero turns to TuxMan and says "OK, enough...call him off!" TuxMan replies..."um, don't look at me...I think he came in your van. He probably snuck out while you were waiting for your bloated sidekick SideBar to wake up."

      --
      My debut novel AMITY now available: http://jeremydbrooks.c
  4. missing someone here.... by Subgenius · · Score: 3, Funny

    But Where is Bob? Or Super-Sweaty Ballmer?

    --
    Toil is Stupid. Don't be Stupid.
    1. Re:missing someone here.... by TripMaster+Monkey · · Score: 5, Funny

      Super-Sweaty Ballmer! Now with Mega-Chair-Throwing action (TM)! Pull the string and hear Super-Sweaty Ballmer say one of the following action phrases:

        - "Developers! Developers! Developers!"

        - "Woooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!"

        - "I'm going to f**king KILL Google!"

      Supplies are limited, so place your order now!

      --
      ____

      ~ |rip/\/\aster /\/\onkey

    2. Re:missing someone here.... by Rob+T+Firefly · · Score: 4, Funny

      Those of us into customizing our own action figures can simply paint a necktie onto a Dr. Evil figure that's been dipped into thin chicken broth.

  5. Hmm... by jrothwell97 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Let me guess.

    Are the nemeses of these characters 'Evil Dr Torvalds' and 'The Jobs Bandit', who are intent on overtaking the world with their clone armies of penguins, platypuses and scary Finder icons?

    --
    Those using pirated Tinysoft signatures(TM) are a real threat to society and should all be thrown in jail.
  6. WTF? by joaommp · · Score: 5, Insightful

    I work at Microsoft. How come I knew this first from /.?</irony>

    Let the "you must be new here" comments begin.

    1. Re:WTF? by joaommp · · Score: 4, Funny

      No, I'm actually motivated by lunch. And learning, too. But lunch is a priority.

  7. Too much cash in MS marketing. by AceJohnny · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Microsoft is the living proof that Marketing > Quality (as if anybody doubted that). They know that their marketing dept is their most important asset, and they can afford to pour cash at them. Hence their marketing people can afford to try out any wacky ideas and see what sticks.

    That's the only explanation I can come up for this initiative. Anything else makes me want to obliterate humanity.

    --
    Misleading titles? Inflammatory blurbs? Keep in mind that Slashdot is a tabloid.
  8. Microsoft At Its Finest by eldavojohn · · Score: 4, Funny

    The best part is when you click "Watch Them in Action!" and it takes you to a page.

    Now, a lot of sites have this crazy idea of embedded video that streams from a site or source that's dedicated to streaming video. You know like YouTube, Blip.tv or any of the .tv sites really. Does Microsoft utilize any of those freely available options? Oh no, of course not! YouTube is Google! Even if we don't have a competing solution we must not use theirs!

    So what happens when you click "view"? Well, it creates a popup window that opens up Windows Media Player! Good luck viewing a .asx file all you non-Windows users.

    The least Microsoft could do is create their own streaming video server but, alas, we must revert to our archaic mentality, reject all that is sensible and invade my privacy and comfort zone by automatically opening a program that is tied to the kernel (and at least historically had admin rights when I didn't) sitting in kernel land on my computer.

    Assistant: Mr. Ballmer! Research indicates that Richard Stallman is 50% more cuddly than you!
    Ballmer: Damnit ... must be his hair. Well, we'll see about that! Put the action figures I've hand crafted here immediately into production! Release plush dolls of clippy! Find me puppies to carry around with me at press conferences and when their cute factor falls below 40%, have them killed and replaced!

    --
    My work here is dung.
    1. Re:Microsoft At Its Finest by mhall119 · · Score: 4, Funny

      So what happens when you click "view"? Well, it creates a popup window that opens up Windows Media Player! Good luck viewing a .asx file all you non-Windows users. Hmmm, if GIF is pronouned "jiff", and JPG is pronounced "jay-peg", wouldn't that make ASX....oh....oh my......suddenly it all makes sense.
      --
      http://www.mhall119.com
  9. they should have just adopted the os-tans by Akatosh · · Score: 5, Insightful

    This has been done and done well. Why the cheap knockoff?

  10. Say what you want. by Xest · · Score: 3, Funny

    This is the coolest thing Microsoft has ever done and I'm not having anyone say otherwise!

    They're like, ninja developer legomen superheroes!

  11. Windows Vista Sensei? by dkalley · · Score: 4, Funny

    From the website:

    He is highly thought of as one of the most powerful warriors alive. Although he is still young, Windows Vista Sensei is said to possess different strengths and confidence not known to anyone. He is already beginning to gain such world fame at his young age that folks are writing stories about him.
    That's quite some selective perception, I can't even believe this is real!!
  12. Marketing taking advantage of similar phrases? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Insightful

    It looks like Microsoft has been on a marketing rampage of trying to confuse various community project names with its own garbage.

    Office Open XML (similar to OpenOffice.org?)
    Source Force (SourceForge, anyone?)

    Seriously, it's like they're trying to give all these great projects a bad name in the eyes of the ignorant masses who will make the subliminal association in their heads. When all they have is marketing left trying to revive the sinking ship, every problem can be made to look like a marketing one.

  13. It's at times like this ... by Stavr0 · · Score: 4, Insightful

    that I regret there's no photoshop contests on Slashdot.

    1. Re:It's at times like this ... by AndyCR · · Score: 3, Funny

      I wasn't going to post this (bored lunch break GIMP work), but now I must. http://i29.tinypic.com/25rjrew.png

      --
      If there's anyone I hate more than stupid people, it's intellectuals.
  14. You'll need your Time Machine... by dzurn · · Score: 3, Informative

    This article is from 2007, and these figures were originally released in 2006.

    But go ahead and watch the video, if you can. See if they'll at least throw in a time-share condo.

  15. Re:For the love of...Apocalypse Ponies! by korbin_dallas · · Score: 3, Funny

    Apocalypse Ponies, my Little Ponies....

    (little girl voice): I'm war pony (flames couch)
    (little girl voice): A I am (evil deep voice) DEATH PONY!

    google: robot chicken apocalypse pony

    --
    They Live, We Sleep
  16. DC will sue? by giminy · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Visual Studio Guy is the Green Lantern, MSDN Webcast Guy is Superman, Virtual Labs Guy is The Flash. I don't see credit on there anywhere, and this is definitely a marketing thing (not a parody).

    I think MSDN Webcast Guy's tagline says it best, "His parents weren't very creative."

    --
    The Right Reverend K. Reid Wightman,
  17. embrace, extend, extinguish - on names by Tom · · Score: 4, Interesting

    I don't think it's coincidence that it sounds a lot like SourceForge.

    I don't know why, but if I wanted to muddle a name, that's something I'd do: Create something that sounds much like it, is a bit childish and ridiculous, and try to make it popular.

    --
    Assorted stuff I do sometimes: Lemuria.org
  18. I would be throwing a chair by now... by hummassa · · Score: 3, Funny

    1. I am a geeky dad of a 8yo boy.
    2. I use Linux exclusively.
    3. My son -- which could be a Microsoft convert if this thing worked -- cannot watch the videos.
    4. Therefore, he is safe from the brainwashing.
    5. Profit!!!

    --
    It's better to be the foot on the boot than the face on the pavement. ~~ tkx Kadin2048
  19. Thanks by lelitsch · · Score: 4, Funny

    Thank you Microsoft, for setting your people back 1000 years.

  20. Those are over on Source Forge by billstewart · · Score: 3, Funny

    I didn't have enough sleep, or something, to deal with this article. Is it mushroom season in the Pacific Northwest, or what?

    --

    Bill Stewart
    New Fast-Compression-only CPR http://preview.tinyurl.com/dy575ks
  21. Re:Haha, the description is ACCURATE! by esocid · · Score: 5, Funny

    10th degree black belt and martial arts master trained in the ancient art of combat, security and connectivity.
    Unless he can't find the drivers needed to use his weapons, then he's SOL.
    --
    Absolute power corrupts absolutely. indymedia
  22. I think I speak for everyone here... by DragonHawk · · Score: 4, Funny

    I think I speak for everyone here when I say: Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot. Over.

    --

    dragonhawk@iname.microsoft.com
    I do not like Microsoft. Remove them from my email address.
  23. I'm waiting for the Batman crossover by GodfatherofSoul · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...because you know Source Fource is out to beat the Penguin.

    --
    I swear to God...I swear to God! That is NOT how you treat your human!
  24. Xerox must have hired the same consultants by fellini8.5 · · Score: 4, Informative

    Xerox recently announced a "viral" marketing campaign involving superhero characters that extoll the virtues of solid ink printing. I shit you not.

    IncredibleInc

    --
    Kineska: Cinema, soapbox, music & musings
  25. hmmm... Source Fource... Source Forge by MadJo · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Can Source Forge perhaps sue Microsoft for infringing on the trademark Sourceforge? (it's at least a closer approximation than Mike Row Soft)

  26. Re:Haha, the description is ACCURATE! by Archangel+Michael · · Score: 3, Funny

    You're about to use a katana ...

    Cancel or Allow?

    --
    Agent K: A *person* is smart. People are dumb, stupid, panicky animals, and you know it.
  27. Bluescreen by wideBlueSkies · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Wow. My knick-nack shelf just bluescreened.

    The only thing left standing is my stuffed Tux.

    --
    Huh?
  28. Offer's expired - March 15 - April 15 2007 by tlhIngan · · Score: 3, Interesting
    I just noticed this - it's in the summary, and in TFA (twice!).

    March 15th through April 15th 2007: Qualification period for the Windows Vista Sensei and Office Master superheros
    (emphasis mine).

    And in the rules...

    Offer good only to the first 5,000 residents of the U.S. or Canada that attend at least two live MSDN Webcasts or complete two MSDN Virtual Labs, or one of each, between March 15, 2007, and April 15, 2007
    (again, emphasis mine).

    Either this is really really really old news (not unusual - it IS /. after all), or someone's got their time machine all messed up?