Iron Man's New Villain — an Open Source Terrorist

An anonymous reader writes "In a recent interview on Comic Book Resources about his new continuation of the Marvel comic-book series 'Invincible Iron Man,' Matt Faction provides information about the the new series (debut will be May 7). The villain is Ezekiel Stane, son of Obadiah Stane (the villain of the new Iron Man movie opening on May 2). Whereas Obadiah was a ruthless billionaire who fought as the Iron Monger, Zeke 'rejects the strategies of his father as being the crude tactics of Attila the Hun.' Instead, he will be 'a post-national business man and kind of an open source ideological terrorist.' As the author puts it, 'Windows wants to be on every computer desktop in the world, but Linux and Stane want to destroy the desktop.' The concept has gone over well on the CBR forums."

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In related news

[dedazo]

The FSF has announced Richard Stallman will be engaging in a speaking tour of comic conventions to demand they be called free ideological terrorists.

OpenSourceTerroristMan and his sidekick...

[Thanshin]

Sharerman!

He will share global economy to it's knees!

His nefarious plan of... sharing stuff, has to be stopped!

Re:OpenSourceTerroristMan and his sidekick...

[Jesus_666]

Okay, how about this set of villains:

The Open Sourceror: Wants the whole world to be covered by the GPL. Has a Shield of Arrogance labeled "RTFM" that can absorb the damage of any attack and turn it into a blast of pure rejection. Can use his package manager to quickly construct mostly-working devices for everything. Thinks the Free Initiative are his best friends.

The Free Initiative: Don't want to be called "Freedom Initiative" because they don't want freedom, they want Free-as-in-freedom. Insist that there's a big difference. Hate the Open Sourceror, the non-Free world and each other, because they can't agree which variant of the BSD licence they want to put the world under.

The Consultant: Sent by IBM manufacturer, the Consultant wears a heavy mechanized armor called the Z System. His goal is to destroy the world (except for IBM) and replace it with a virtual clone running on IBM mainframes. Attacks by throwing blade servers with deadly precision. Has the mysterious ability to drain cash from people's wallets at frightening speed.

Sunray: Sent by Sun, this combatant lugs around a 500 liter canister of Java on his back, which e constantly drinks from by means of a straw. Insists that the caffeine in the Java makes him slower, despite the fact that he can barely move with the canister on his back. Has a on-again-off-again alliance with the Open Sourceror.

Emmessdeeann: This mysterious alien was hired by Microsoft to ensure that every single person on the planet has a valid licence for every product Microsoft manufactures, plans to manufacture at some point or doesn't manufacture but wish they did. Has a Cash Launcher, which suffocates his enemies under wads of Dollar bills, then sets them alight. Also has a Crash Launcher, which causes his power armor to shut down until a service techician can fix it. Unfortunately, both are built into the same weapon. Insists on ending each sentence with ".NET" instead of a full stop. Has a son and a daughter, both called "hWnd".

Google: Omnipresent and omniscient. Insist they aren't doing actual evil while using thir vast archive of footage of illegal activities to blackmail everyone into looking at their context-sensitive ads. Even though they are targetting the entire population of the planet, nobody could yet topple their "we only target evil people" argument.

Re:People! Not everything is terrorism!

[Anonymous Coward]

Agreed, people who use that sort of language must be branded stupidity terrorists, and treated accordingly.

Re:People! Not everything is terrorism!

[Anonymous Coward]

Your argument sounds like something a terrorist would say.

Don't you remember? 9/11 changed everything! If you break the law you are a terrorist because using the police to respond to your crime takes manpower and resources away from fighting terrorism. And if that doesn't convince you then it is obvious that *you* are trying to obstruct the fight against terrorism by not fully supporting every policy of the government.

So stop hating freedom, terrorist.

Some Villain

[lusiphur69]

I find it hard to look at the concept as menacing.

"We're going to provide Linux free of charge to anyone! MUHAHAHAHA!"

"Beware my open source laser! Powered by the distilled tears of Microsoft execs, it will cut you out of vendor lock-in!"

Or better, Stark teams up with Microsoft to combat the 'threat', then, during a battle as Iron Man powers up his blaster, the HUD flashes..

  WinIRON.sys
  The driver is attempting to access memory beyond the end of the
  allocation.
  Stop: 0x000000D6
  (0x89781000, 0x00000000, 0xBF82683F, 0x00000000)
  WinIRON.sys address BF82683F base at BF80000

Re:Open Source Terrorism?

[Max Littlemore]

I'm sure if the movie was sponsored by Red Hat, Sun and IBM, Iron Man would get his arse kicked by Big-Iron Man - who runs Linux of course.

Re:People! Not everything is terrorism!

[teh kurisu]

if met with complaint, answer "Why do you hate Freedom so much?"

That does sound like something that an over-zealous open source activist might say.

Re:People! Not everything is terrorism!

[empaler]

And before 9/11 every bad person was compared to Hitler. Even if they didn't kill nearly as many Jews as he did. Godsdamnit, I'M WORKING AS FAST AS I CAN!

Re:People! Not everything is terrorism!

[Anonymous Coward]

...spelling Nazi.

Re:People! Not everything is terrorism!

[Kjella]

Disclaimer: I'm not German, I'm Dutch. <rimshot>Don't worry, the last guy wasn't german either...</rimshot>

Re:People! Not everything is terrorism!

[Fallen Seraph]

On an electrical engineering exam a friend of mine took, one of the bonus questions asked one they use one particular formula for calculations now in lieu of a different one that was used a few years back.

His response was "Because 9/11 changed everything"