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Hans Reiser Guilty of First Degree Murder

Posted by kdawson on from the so-much-for-the-geek-defense dept.

Anonymous Meoward writes "Today Hans Reiser was found guilty of first degree murder in Oakland, California. Quoting Wired: 'In a murder case with no body, no crime scene, no reliable eyewitness and virtually no physical evidence, the prosecution began the trial last November with a daunting task ahead... The turning point in the trial came when Reiser took the stand in his own defense March 3.' Whether he really did it or not, Hans basically just didn't know when to shut up."

15 of 1,395 comments (clear)

  1. US jury system does it again by QuantumG · · Score: 4, Funny

    No evidence? No body? No murder weapon? Who cares! The prosecutor used Power Point in his closing.. The defendant is "weird".

    Oh well, maybe Hans will confess and reveal where he stashed the body now.

    [/rimshot]

    --
    How we know is more important than what we know.
    1. Re:US jury system does it again by Tackhead · · Score: 4, Funny

      Oh well, maybe Hans will confess and reveal where he stashed the body now.

      Probably a blob, or maybe split under a well-balanced grove of trees. Even if he can't use the journal to recover the data, he should at least be able to get the last-modified date, right?

      (Why does it smell of sulfur all of a sudden, and what am I doing in this handbasket?)

    2. Re:US jury system does it again by uniquename72 · · Score: 5, Funny

      In my truck you'll find a copy of the Satanic Bible, 1984, and Catcher in the Rye (Harry Potter too, but that's because I'm reading it to my son). You're a highschool freshman and you have a son?

      it's Iowa Oh, now I get it.
    3. Re:US jury system does it again by OMNIpotusCOM · · Score: 5, Funny

      You're the type of guy that would reply to Jonathan Swift by giving him recipe ideas, aren't ya?

    4. Re:US jury system does it again by Walter+Wart · · Score: 5, Funny

      Samson slew the Philistines with the jawbone of an ass.

      Hans Reiser has done himself in with the same weapon.

      --
      The man who never alters his opinion is like the stagnant water and breeds Reptiles of the Mind -- William Blake
    5. Re:US jury system does it again by Valdrax · · Score: 5, Funny

      Not if you know when to shut up. What about the above post makes you think that's likely?
      --
      If it's for-profit but free, you're not the customer -- you're the product (e.g., the Slashdot Beta's "audience").
  2. Oblig ReiserFS Joke by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    It's written in his journal!

  3. Re:Reasonable doubt? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    >Too bad ReiserFS will probably die
    I'm guessing it will disappear in the middle of the night, never to be heard from again. Police will arrest the xfs maintainer on chargest, the evidence being that neighbors saw him carry out what could have been a backup tape wrapped in a roll of carpet in the middle of the night.

  4. Re:Free Software by ettlz · · Score: 4, Funny

    Cue the chroot jokes.

  5. So what exactly IS the default cellblock size? by csoto · · Score: 4, Funny

    Ba dum dum. Thank you. I'm here all week. Have the lobster!

    --
    There exists no way of exchanging information without making judgments. --Bene Gesserit Axiom
  6. Re:If you get arrested and/or get put on trial... by plover · · Score: 4, Funny
    If you're innocent, yes, by all means, shut the hell up. But if you're actually guilty, please feel free to talk all you want. Lie to the cops, tell them things that contradict other easily proven things, make stuff up, blame other people.

    I have no particular interest in offering guilty people a defense for what they've done. If you've intentionally murdered someone, please go to jail and get the hell out of our society.

    --
    John
  7. What he did is bad, but you gotta admit... by Tumbleweed · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...he created one killer file system!

  8. IN SOVIET RUSSIA by Jeremiah+Cornelius · · Score: 5, Funny

    Reiser fsck YOU!

    --
    "Flyin' in just a sweet place,
    Never been known to fail..."
  9. The FAT defence by RiotingPacifist · · Score: 4, Funny

    This is a FAT32 partition, it comes from microsoft.
    It has a 4GB limit, in the age of 5GB DVDs why would you ship a product with a 4GB limit?
    It just doesn't make any sense!
    If this is FAT32 partition, the jury must acquit!!

    --
    IranAir Flight 655 never forget!
    1. Re:The FAT defence by John_Booty · · Score: 4, Funny

      so I stuck 32 in to avoid a pointless thread.

      Well, that sure worked.
      --

      OtakuBooty.com: Smart, funny, sexy nerds.