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NASA Installing Shocks On Ares

caffiend666 writes "In order to abate the massive vibration issues of their new Ares I spacecraft, NASA is installing shock absorbers. 'The plan is to install 16 canisters in the bottom of the rocket with 100-pound weights attached to springs. Battery-powered motors will move the weights up and down to stop vibrations. Those are essentially remote-controlled shock absorbers, said Garry Lyles, who headed the team of NASA engineers tackling the shaking problem.' So, when the spaceship is a rocking, don't come a knocking?"

10 of 293 comments (clear)

  1. Next : by MRe_nl · · Score: 4, Funny

    Chrome rims and a spoiler. We might not be alone, so dress to impress!

    Btw, not 16, "a 17th shock absorber will be a ring of weights and springs near the middle of the rocket".
    Might not have a cannister though, or a switch ; )

    --
    "Kill 'em all and let Root sort 'em out"
  2. Funny coincidence... by Alwin+Henseler · · Score: 3, Funny

    In related news, did anyone notice the Oprah ad below the story (down on the left side):

    "LOSE WEIGHT IN 2008! THE BESTLIFE DIET - JOIN NOW!"

    Talk about context-sensitive advertising ;-))

  3. Re:This is not going to increase efficiency.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Why don't we outsource the design to some German scientists, like we did the last time?

    While it's not rocket science related (it's actually automotive), there's an old saying. Given a specific problem requiring a screw, Japanese engineers would perform computer simulations of every single possible scenario and develop a screw that you have never seen before. German engineers too would run the same simulations, but in the end they would say "Oh what ze heck. Let's use 2 screws. And make zem big!"

    Take apart a Toyota, and then a Mercedes, and you'll know what I'm talking about. :-)

  4. Re:This is not going to increase efficiency.... by jameskojiro · · Score: 3, Funny

    Yeah, where do you find living Nazi-Era German Rocket Scientists these days?

    --
    Tsukasa: All I really want, is to be left alone...
  5. Orion? NASA? Shock absorbers? by thisissilly · · Score: 2, Funny

    I looked at the title and for a moment was stunned, thinking that NASA was actually working on building Project Orion. Now thers's a spaceship that really needs its shock absorbers.

  6. Re:cost? by Intron · · Score: 3, Funny

    It's been considered. Leave the first stage on the ground. Launch with a cannon or railgun to get the initial acceleration instead of putting the engine and fuel on board. Non-living cargo can take considerable acceleration. You just need a longer railgun if you want to launch pesky humans.

    As for this system, it seems like what they are doing is basically the same as noise-canceling headphones. Maybe they need a couple of giant bass speakers. Once in space they can switch them over to play techno.

    --
    Intron: the portion of DNA which expresses nothing useful.
  7. Re:Hooray for more weight... by encoderer · · Score: 2, Funny

    You're clearly no engineer.

    If you were, you'd realize that all we need to do is starve them for a few months and, bam, double the capacity for hurtling lawyers into space.

  8. Read that dyslexically by Alzheimers · · Score: 2, Funny

    I read that headline dyslexically and thought it said "NASA Installing Shocks on Arse"

    I thought it was about some new kind of employee training program involving electrified chairs so that managers could BZZZT someone not working :P

  9. Re:cost? by berashith · · Score: 2, Funny

    Bass and techno in space?

    What a perfect way to get intelligent life to come destroy us all.

    I wonder how you say get off my lawn in alien ?

  10. Re:cost? by decsnake · · Score: 2, Funny

    Maybe they need a couple of giant bass speakers. Once in space they can switch them over to play techno.

    In space, no one can hear you clubbing