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Bringing Giant Tortoises Back From Extinction

Posted by timothy on from the reviving-the-turtle-hegemony dept.

fizzysister writes "The BBC reports that scientists at Yale are intending to resurrect an extinct species of Galapagos tortoise, the Geochelone elephantopus. Unfortunately, not in the style of Jurassic Park, so no tortoise-based theme parks just yet. They will, however, be using genetic profiling of living tortoises that carry some of the elephantopus genes, to select the most appropriate of these to mate and thus eventually (after a century or more) create a generation of 'pure' Geochelone elephantopus individuals."

17 of 125 comments (clear)

  1. TFA doesn't mention by antifoidulus · · Score: 5, Funny

    any plans on training these resurrected giant tortoises in the art of Ninjitsu. What a gip.

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    Monstar L
    1. Re:TFA doesn't mention by Cow+Jones · · Score: 4, Funny

      any plans on training these resurrected giant tortoises in the art of Ninjitsu.

      Dude, those giant turtles are scary enough without Ninjitsu.
      In fact, one of them is so huge and powerful that four elephants couldn't manage to keep it down, unless they in turn were weighed down by a huge disk-shaped rock.

      CJ

      --

      Ah, arrogance and stupidity, all in the same package. How efficient of you. -- Londo Mollari
    2. Re:TFA doesn't mention by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      The plans are right here. You just need plenty of radioactive waste to finish the job. :-)

    3. Re:TFA doesn't mention by Hognoxious · · Score: 4, Funny

      There's where you're wrong, it isn't just one turtle.

      --
      Confucius say, "Find worm in apple - bad. Find half a worm - worse."
    4. Re:TFA doesn't mention by KillerBob · · Score: 2, Funny

      And a rat to train them. Don't forget the rat.

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      If you believe everything you read, you'd better not read. - Japanese proverb
    5. Re:TFA doesn't mention by BarryJacobsen · · Score: 4, Funny

      There's where you're wrong, it isn't just one turtle.

      That's right! It's turtles all the way down!

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      Track your TV Shows with your iPhone - FREE
    6. Re:TFA doesn't mention by Abreu · · Score: 2, Funny

      Actually, no...

      The current theory is that Great A'Tuin is travelling through the universe in search of a mate.

      When this happens, a cataclysmic event (colloquially known as the "Big Bang") will occur.

      That is why so many sages have tried to find out Great A'Tuins gender...

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      No sig for the moment.
    7. Re:TFA doesn't mention by R2.0 · · Score: 5, Funny

      "What a gip."

      It's "gyp", derived from "Gypsies". Please get your culturally insensitive references correct or the PC police will run out of work, and we don't want that, now do we? Otherwise they might get involved in more important things, like changing housing policy to provide loans to unqualified applicants.

      Oh, wait...

      (This offtopic flamebait brought to you by the letter Y and the number "I paid off my fucking loans why can't everybody else?!")

      --
      "As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly." A. Carlson
    8. Re:TFA doesn't mention by lpangelrob · · Score: 4, Funny

      The original poster may have been referring to the fact that Ronald Reagan, the original Gipper, also failed to fund the U.S. Ninja/Giant Tortoise Defense Initiative.

      --
      -Rob

      Biblical fiscal responsibility

  2. Bene Gesserit @ Yale??? by Vampo · · Score: 2, Funny

    I thought they were not supposed to appear for another few thousand years. They are obviously moving into the first experimental stages of their master plan ;)

  3. Very Cool by FatSean · · Score: 3, Funny

    I want my own giant tortoise for a pet!

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    Blar.
  4. Re:This could redefine the term species by scorp1us · · Score: 4, Funny

    I thought the definition rested on the the ability of the offspring to procreate successfully.

    Which, I am told, does happen occasionally for jack-asses.

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    Slashdot's rate-of-post filter: Preventing you from posting too many great ideas at once.
  5. Playing God! by bigattichouse · · Score: 3, Funny

    I imagine people will scream about "Playing God"(tm) in these circumstances. They, of course, say, "What a miracle" when they are brought back from what should have been a death by heart attack. Personally, I think small northern russian and canadian provinces could really have a boom if we'd bring back mastodons and such, selling the hunting rights. In my view, you're only "Playing God" if you're talking velociraptors and making your own artificial creepy stuff. I just can't see "Giant Tortoises go on rampage", unless they have jet packs and live in Tokyo.

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    meh
    1. Re:Playing God! by lilomar · · Score: 2, Funny

      In my view, you're only "Playing God" if you're talking velociraptors and making your own artificial creepy stuff.

      I'm a talking velociraptor making my own artificial creepy stuff -- you insensitive clod!

      --
      The creator of this post (Jacob Smith) hereby releases it, and all of his other posts, into the public domain.
  6. Re:This could redefine the term species by R2.0 · · Score: 2, Funny

    "Which, I am told, does happen occasionally for jack-asses."

    Occasionally? With the amount of jackasses in the world, how could they NOT be breeding amongst themselves and multiplying?

    --
    "As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly." A. Carlson
  7. Re:Yes... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    I reckon he has loost some spelling skills.

  8. The Book of Secrets by SleptThroughClass · · Score: 2, Funny

    The rat is optional. There's now a book to train them. Just have your children and grandchildren teach them to read.