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China Announces Launch-Success Details — Before Launch

Posted by timothy on from the china's-government-!-china dept.

Ironsides writes "After faking the fireworks at the Olympics this year, one would have thought China had learned their lesson. Now, it appears they announced the success of their manned space mission before liftoff even occured, complete with dialogue."

21 of 307 comments (clear)

  1. What's next, a fake moon walk? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Nothing like a guaranteed success

    1. Re:What's next, a fake moon walk? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      They are going to hire Michael Jackson to train their astronauts to avoid that problem.

    2. Re:What's next, a fake moon walk? by lgw · · Score: 4, Funny

      That's far too reasonable. Surely China is simply preparing for it's fake moon landing program, to show it's just as advanced as the US in fake space programs. Eveyrone knows the moon landings were really filmed in a soundstage on Mars!

      --
      Socialism: a lie told by totalitarians and believed by fools.
    3. Re:What's next, a fake moon walk? by conlaw · · Score: 3, Funny
      Yes, it's awful when a country warps reality, like the statement from May 2003,

      US President George W Bush has said the US has prevailed in the Battle of Iraq in a speech on the aircraft carrier USS Abraham Lincoln.

      http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/2989459.stm

  2. I can't wait. by darinfp · · Score: 5, Funny

    It looks like we'll be seeing $2 time machines imported from China any day now....

    1. Re:I can't wait. by charlie763 · · Score: 5, Funny

      Expect to see them last week.

      --
      Welcome to the land of the free...pay toll ahead...no photography...please open your bag...
  3. Also leaked by Shadow+Wrought · · Score: 5, Funny

    Also leaked was a transcipt for their prospective moon landing...

    Shenzhou 11: Base this is Shenzhou 11. Shenzhou has landed. Jesus H. Christ Base, We're on the fucking moon. Over.

    Base: Roger, Shenzhou, we copy you. We cannot believe you are on the fucking moon. Repeat: Cannot fucking believe it. Over.

    --
    If brevity is the soul of wit, then how does one explain Twitter?
    1. Re:Also leaked by Red+Flayer · · Score: 4, Funny
      Heh. Gotta love the dialogue in the article, though -- one line:

      "The firm voice of the controller broke the silence of the whole ship. Now, the target is captured 12 seconds ahead of the predicted time ...

      Sounds like the narration of one of those horrible 80s space pornos.

      --
      "Trolls they were, but filled with the evil will of their master: a fell race..." -- J.R.R. Tolkien on Olog-hai
    2. Re:Also leaked by Mordok-DestroyerOfWo · · Score: 4, Funny

      Ground Control to Major Wong...Ground Control to Major Wong...

      --
      "Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right" - Salvor Hardin
    3. Re:Also leaked by maeka · · Score: 4, Funny

      Take your melamine pills and put your helmet on

    4. Re:Also leaked by Daimanta · · Score: 4, Funny

      "Did these people go to a regular journalism school, or some kind of Bizarro-world journalism school where they teach a combination of news writing and creative writing?"

      Close, they got internships at Fox Networks.

      --
      Knowledge is power. Knowledge shared is power lost.
    5. Re:Also leaked by Siridar · · Score: 3, Funny

      Sounds like the narration of one of those horrible 80s space pornos.

      Space Pornos?

      This is relevant to my interests.

  4. Timezone thing? by HtR · · Score: 5, Funny

    Yeah, but because of timezones, it's already tomorrow over there, right?

    --
    Have you tried turning it off and on again?
  5. Re:And tomorrow they'll announce by corsec67 · · Score: 4, Funny

    You didn't get the memo?

    That announcement was yesterday.

    --
    If I have nothing to hide, don't search me
  6. Re:And tomorrow they'll announce by Bwana+Geek · · Score: 5, Funny

    My memory must be slipping. I could have sworn they announced it next weekend.

  7. Re:Funny stuff. by flyingsquid · · Score: 5, Funny

    Personally, I'm not all that impressed by this incident. The Chinese lied about putting people in orbit? Please. Our government faked an entire moon landing. They have a long way to go before they'll catch up with us.

  8. Hah - Oblig All your Base by thewils · · Score: 3, Funny

    Pilot: Somebody set up us the bomb.
    Ground Control: We get signal.
    Pilot: What !
    Ground Control: Main screen turn on.
    Pilot: It's you !!

    Technician: How are you gentlemen !!
    Technician: All your base are belong to us.

    --
    Once I was a four stone apology. Now I am two separate gorillas.
  9. The proper Homer Simpson quote by mangu · · Score: 3, Funny

    Space Pornos?
    This is relevant to my interests.

    No, no, you should have said "Your ideas are intriguing and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter"

  10. Re:WTF? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    They use rorem ipsum instead.

  11. Won't happen to Google News by hackingbear · · Score: 3, Funny

    Google News will never make such silly mistakes like Xinhua does. They only reincarnate the old ones. Subscribe to Google News today!

  12. Re:Thank you, Captain Obvious. by atraintocry · · Score: 4, Funny

    The difference between dummy text and "deception" is that the dummy text is not supposed to end up published. It seems likely that this article was published by accident, which makes it likely that this is in fact dummy text. I did not read any part of the parent's post that defended the publishing of propaganda.

    Perhaps you wrote your reply in advance, not reading what you replied to, and accidentally posted it.