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More Sony Batteries Recalled
Scott Hagerman passes along news of yet another recall of Sony laptop batteries. The batteries in question, manufactured in the same timeframe as those involved in the massive 2006 recall, are in laptops sold by HP, Dell, Toshiba, Lenovo, and Acer. Neither Apple nor Sony itself used these batteries in their laptops. This time 100,000 batteries are involved — 65,000 of them sold outside of the US — vs. the 10 million recalled in 2006. The Consumer Product Safety Commission fielded 19 reports of batteries overheating and/or catching fire.
A couple weeks ago, while browsing around the library downtown, I had to take a piss. As I entered the john, Barack Obama -- the messiah himself -- came out of one of the booths. I stood at the urinal looking at him out of the corner of my eye as he washed his hands. He didn't once look at me. He was busy and in any case I was sure the secret service wouldn't even let me shake his hand.
As soon as he left I darted into the booth he'd vacated, hoping there might be a lingering smell of shit and even a seat still warm from his sturdy ass. I found not only the smell but the shit itself. He'd forgotten to flush. And what a treasure he had left behind. Three or four beautiful specimens floated in the bowl. It apparently had been a fairly dry, constipated shit, for all were fat, stiff, and ruggedly textured. The real prize was a great feast of turd -- a nine inch gastrointestinal triumph as thick as his cock -- or at least as I imagined it!
I knelt before the bowl, inhaling the rich brown fragrance and wondered if I should obey the impulse building up inside me. I'd always been a liberal democrat and had been on the Obama train since last year. Of course I'd had fantasies of meeting him, sucking his cock and balls, not to mention sucking his asshole clean, but I never imagined I would have the chance. Now, here I was, confronted with the most beautiful five-pound turd I'd ever feasted my eyes on, a sausage fit to star in any fantasy and one I knew to have been hatched from the asshole of Barack Obama, the chosen one.
Why not? I plucked it from the bowl, holding it with both hands to keep it from breaking. I lifted it to my nose. It smelled like rich, ripe limburger (horrid, but thrilling), yet had the consistency of cheddar. What is cheese anyway but milk turning to shit without the benefit of a digestive tract?
I gave it a lick and found that it tasted better then it smelled.
I hesitated no longer. I shoved the fucking thing as far into my mouth as I could get it and sucked on it like a big half nigger cock, beating my meat like a madman. I wanted to completely engulf it and bit off a large chunk, flooding my mouth with the intense, bittersweet flavor. To my delight I found that while the water in the bowl had chilled the outside of the turd, it was still warm inside. As I chewed I discovered that it was filled with hard little bits of something I soon identified as peanuts. He hadn't chewed them carefully and they'd passed through his body virtually unchanged. I ate it greedily, sending lump after peanutty lump sliding scratchily down my throat. My only regret was that Barack Obama wasn't there to see my loyalty and wash it down with his piss.
I soon reached a terrific climax. I caught my cum in the cupped palm of my hand and drank it down. Believe me, there is no more delightful combination of flavors than the hot sweetness of cum with the rich bitterness of shit. It's even better than listening to an Obama speech!
Afterwards I was sorry that I hadn't made it last longer. But then I realized that I still had a lot of fun in store for me. There was still a clutch of virile turds left in the bowl. I tenderly fished them out, rolled them into my handkerchief, and stashed them in my briefcase. In the week to come I found all kinds of ways to eat the shit without bolting it right down. Once eaten it's gone forever unless you want to filch it third hand out of your own asshole. Not an unreasonable recourse in moments of desperation or simple boredom.
I stored the turds in the refrigerator when I was not using them but within a week they were all gone. The last one I held in my mouth without chewing, letting it slowly dissolve. I had liquid shit trickling down my throat for nearly four hours. I must have had six orgasms in the process.
I often think of Barack Obama dropping solid gold out of his sweet, pink asshole every day, never knowing what joy it could, and at least once did, bring to a grateful democrat.
I like it!
Its funny how Sony does not use their own batteries because of this problem!
We keep getting bad news, after bad news, after bad news...
http://angrysonyfanboy.ytmnd.com/
I only see HP, Toshiba and Dell mentioned on the two linked to websites. Where do the mentions of Lenovo and Acer come from?
1d10t.
They buy batteries in. "Hey, Korean battery manufacturers, I want 125 million batteries, to this spec. 'How much?' - Nah, too expensive", "Hey Taiwanese battery manufacturers". some time passes. "Hey small Chinese province battery manufacturers"
"w00t, we got 125 million batteries for the same price as 62.5 million Big Macs"
If I had an Ass, I'd call it Fanny Bottom, then I could slap my Ass; Fanny Bottom, on the Arse.
I am the god of laptop, and I bring you... Fire! Your PC will burn. Fire! And your house will, in turn. I'll see it burn...
one of the axis of evil - microsoft and SONY.
If you mod me down, I will become more powerful than you can imagine....
Lay off the fucking leetspeak, kid. Nobody is impressed by it. That being said, I was wondering why your post started off talking about a 10 sided die, and what the 't' after it meant.
tw@
If I had an Ass, I'd call it Fanny Bottom, then I could slap my Ass; Fanny Bottom, on the Arse.
The guy who decided to outsource the manufacturing of those batteries should be *fired* (or forced to use one of his own products, which has the same effect).
Seriously, after Mattel, VW and Sony, how many examples do managers need to figure out that low-cost labor can be very costly?
lucm, indeed.
I wander why it's always their battery?
All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.
Makes sense not to use something you KNOW is bad, but it's begging for conspiracy theories. They deliberately gave us flaming batteries so their laptops would look better! Maybe there will be a lawsuit or two, but I have to wonder why someone would look to buy parts from a competitor with a clear conflict of interest.
the r4in..w3 can be declined in market
Now I can't justify replacing my 2yo laptop because the battery no longer holds a good charge, they're giving me a new one.
LETS DECOMPOSE & ENJOY ASSEMBLING
[tux.org]? Are You plainly states t;hat
Well you see, what happened was that SONY did not pay its greens fees at the Illuminati golf course. The CEO thought being a 32nd degree Mason would get him out of paying the greens fees, but alas that is only allowed for 33rd degree Masons. So now, not only are their batteries causing more problems, and them even more embarrassment, but the CEO of SONY is no longer able to get to the 33rd degree of the Scottish Rite of Masonry, where he can find out who really killed Kennedy, shake hands with some alien representatives, and have a tear of schnapps with Satan.
Similar to the upcoming US election results
Lay off the fucking leetspeak, kid. Nobody is impressed by it.
That being said, I was wondering why your post started off talking about a 10 sided die, and what the 't' after it meant.
sadly not the only one.
Gotta plug my laptop in and take out the battery before it exp
All military contracts are lowest-bidder. By your arguement, none of the planes should fly, none of the guns should shoot, and none of the bombs explode.
This obviously isn't the case - there's no fundamental problem with going for the lowest bidder for a particular project... as long as the standards are strict and are enforced.
I'll guarentee there was a quality-control standard on the purity of the materials in these batteries. The fact that they're an apparent fire hazard is proof that either the standards were not enforced, or they weren't set properly to begin with.
Have you been touched by his noodly appendage?
I happen to have a Toshiba P35-S609 with a battery Model No. PA3383U-1BRS. I called them to ask if my battery is subject to this recall. They asked which version of Windows I was running and I indicated I was running Ubuntu Linux. Then they tried to give me the link to a web site where I could download a Windows program that would identify whether my battery needed to be replaced. The support person was an idiot and continued to try and give me the Windows link long after I had assured him I was unwilling to re-install Windows just to run his program. I will not be buying any more Toshiba products.
Is it just me or does being modded 'flamebait' on this topic take on a whole new meaning?
It's called Quality Assurance. Remember that whenever you buy "a Sony".
Sony: giving you more bang for the buck.