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Implant Raises Cellular Army To Attack Cancer

Posted by ScuttleMonkey on from the zombie-medicine dept.

holy_calamity writes "New Scientist reports on a sneaky new approach to getting the immune system to fight cancer. An implant releases a 'molecular perfume' irresistible to messenger immune cells, which enter the implant where they are given a sample of the cancer's 'scent' and a disperse signal that sends them scurrying to the nearest lymph node. There they convince other immune cells to start attacking anything that matches the sample they picked up."

11 of 193 comments (clear)

  1. Whatcouldpossiblygowrong? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    There they convince other immune cells to start attacking anything that matches the sample they picked up.

    "We have bad news. We accidentally gave a sample of your husband's reproductive organs. On the bright side, he won't be needing a vasectomy at any point in the future"

  2. Re:uhhh by snowraver1 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Time to quit quitting smoking!

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  3. yeah but once they have a taste for blood by commodoresloat · · Score: 3, Funny

    If watching three seasons of Dexter has taught me anything, it's that once someone gets a taste for killing, they have a need to kill again. What happens with this army after it kills the cancer? Who does it kill next? You're going to have a mercenary army running loose in your system desperate for another kill....

    1. Re:yeah but once they have a taste for blood by Anpheus · · Score: 3, Funny

      If watching three seasons of House has taught me anything, it's that once someone gets a taste for lying, they have a need to lie again. What happens with this army after it lies about curing cancer? Who does it lie to next? You're going to have a mercenary army running loose in your system desperate for another fabrication....

    2. Re:yeah but once they have a taste for blood by Al+Al+Cool+J · · Score: 3, Funny

      Watching three seasons of House should have taught you that if doctors think it is cancer, then it's not cancer, unless it turns out to actually be cancer. Also, the first five treatments they try will probably make things worse, and ultimately the patient will only be cured because of some random remark.

  4. "Molecular perfume"? by exploder · · Score: 2, Funny

    As opposed to the nonmolecular kind?

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    1. Re:"Molecular perfume"? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      They don't want to confuse it with elemental perfume.

  5. Re:cure for cancer!! by CarpetShark · · Score: 2, Funny

    I know, right? The Visitors would have given us their cancer cure ages ago, if it wasn't for that stupid Donovan guy.

  6. I AM LEGEND by jjohn · · Score: 2, Funny

    Did anyone else think of the latest movie version of /I AM LEGEND/ when reading about this miracle cure for cancer?

    I'll begin hording food and guns now.

  7. I, for one by Amazing+Quantum+Man · · Score: 2, Funny

    welcome our new cellular overlords.

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    Fascism starts when the efficiency of the government becomes more important than the rights of the people.
  8. Re:Easily abused as a biological weapon. by orielbean · · Score: 2, Funny

    Bullets! My only weakness! How...did...you...know??!!