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How To Encourage Workers To Suggest Innovation?
An anonymous reader writes "The software company where I work has an Innovation and Knowledge program that encourages workers to provide ideas for new products and suggestions to improve the work place, productivity or welfare. The ideas and suggestions are evaluated by a board that decides whether they should be implemented or not. The group of workers with more ideas participates in a raffle to receive a prize. I would like to know what other programs people have seen like this and how they differ. What is the best way to encourage workers to suggest new products to be made / researched by the company?"
Whatever you do, discard all first suggestions. They're all just wannabe first posters.
Set your phasers on "funky"!
Homer: [watching vending machine] Apple... Apple... Apple... come on, Candy Bar... [looking at an apple in the machine] Hey, I know you! You're that first apple I didn't want! That sinks it! I'm really gonna get let them have it this time! [writing on a notepad next to the suggestion box] No more apples in the vending machine PLEASE!! Then Mr. Burns gets it and reads it in a demeaning voice "Oh, don't worry, there will be plenty of apples in the vending machine."
God spoke to me.
What is the best way to encourage workers to suggest new products to be made / researched by the company?
"Ever since the Phoenicians invented money, there has been only one answer to that question." -- Clarence Darrow
I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
Use Lean to encourage them.
So I come up with an idea that could save the company thousands, or even millions of dollars. and, I get a toaster oven. nice incentive.
Not quite. Its a raffle, so you might get a toaster oven. Or you might not. Nobody knows! You're intrigued -- I can tell.
Sigvatr! Get back to work and stop screwing around on the Slashdots!
davejenkins.com |
Keep a couple easy HR girls that flirt entirely too much, and leave them with a date with Yatori in HR. Asian girl makes some totally inappropriate advances after dinner...
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1) No chairs, they just encourage people to rest. To facilitate their removal, during lunch or very early in the morning saw a notch in a leg of each chair at random. Pretty soon there will be no chairs left, and productivity will soar.
2) Require security staff to wear halloween masks, year round. It'll increase security presence, and show the guards have a sense of humor. Train guards to laugh, whenever they're stared at.
3) Restrict access to the elevators, storing boxes and such inside it to limit occupancy to one person. People need exercise to work productively. People that work on the lower floors should sign an "attendance" sheet kept on the top floor, every morning.
4) Cover all the walls with mirrors. You'll save tons of money on the lighting bill.
1) Have two or three employees per cubicle. It saves space, and increases teamwork.
2) Replace all incandescent bulbs with green tinted bulbs, use green tinted panels for overhead lights. It'll improve the employee's attention to detail.
5) Instead of free coffee in the break room, have free green tea (optionally switch containers and add food coloring). More caffiene means more work gets done. Because of the green lighting, most things will look green anyhow, and you can tell them it's still coffee.
6) Generally, rodents are considered pests, but if you lovingly refer to them by some random employees name, they become "pets". No more big spending on exterminators. Repeat after me, "How could you suggest killing [name], she's the lead receptionist!".
9) Make up a name, tell the employees he's the new junior vice president. Whenever something bad happens, blame it on this made up person. If the employees ask to see him, tell them he works at a different branch, or he's out of town on business. Optionally create an email address and phone extension for them. Watch all the negative energy flow away from you, and towards nobody.
6) Always have a "yes" man standing within five feet of you, to agree with everything you say. Most people will try to complain one on one, and this makes that virtually impossible.
8) Have an disreputable electrician switch line and neutral. They'll know what that means. Give them a couple hundred bucks to keep it quiet. Whenever somebody gets zapped, make jokes about them and their static electricity problem. Electricity is a mystical force, constant zaps will increase their sensitivity and alertness to unimaginable levels!
7) Email sharing. Save money by making anywhere from 3 to 7 employees share the same email address. Randomly switch addresses between these groups.
2) Replace the paper towel in bathrooms with a high grit sandpaper. It might cost slightly more, but your workers will be squeaky clean.
4) Randomly play folk music through the loudspeakers. Follow each song with a "Heeyah, folks! [imaginary persons name from idea 9] thought you might need some cheering up, so he told me to play a song for you.". Optionally pay someone beforehand to call on the phone, sing along to it, and have them say hello to the employees (this might be tricky, but it's worth it).
5) When talking to owners or customers, refer to your subordinates by a "group" name. Such as the "skunk works", "fruit loops", or "pig skins". This will increase your departments recognition, motivate employees, and get you a promotion.
16) Mismatch words, to describe common things. Instead of "search", use the word "sort". Instead of "email", use the word "access". Instead of "database", use "box". Or any creative blog you decide to invoke. See how that works? They'll have to think about it, and they'll often ask for clarification. What you do is repeat the entire phrase, without that word. Then smile and describe it slowly, like you're describing it to a child. Misunderstandings will be a thing of the past.
17) Use mixed messages. Whenever you have an employee of the month, or some other random person singled out, hang the picture of them (or just their name) above a garbage can, toilet or generally crooked/upside-down. This lets