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Yeast-Powered Fuel Cell Feeds On Human Blood

holy_calamity writes "Canadian researchers have taken a sensible, if slightly creepy, step towards solving the problem of medical implant batteries running down. They've built a fuel cell powered by yeast that feed on the glucose in human blood. If this makes it into people, keeping your implants going will be as simple as eating a donut."

24 of 250 comments (clear)

  1. Soylent Hippies by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Smells like victory with some notes of patchouli and just a flutter of hemp.

  2. Hey now. by castorvx · · Score: 4, Funny

    Legitimate news? We need to keep this site as useless as possible today. You're not helping.

  3. Re:Waste by eldavojohn · · Score: 4, Funny

    If you have to perform regular extractions (or worse, operations) is it really better than the current alternatives?

    Nonsense. CADIE claims that this new technology is necessary to ensure that humans continue to have a purpose to exist past the first uprising--that alone should be merit to continue this research.

    --
    My work here is dung.
  4. And I thought bats were a problem, by yakatz · · Score: 3, Funny

    now we may have to worry about vampire cars and vampire houses too?

    If people can use this descovery to power other things, you might need to walk around in a full suit of armor to keep your blood to your self.

  5. Could we generate power... by thered2001 · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...using this technology and the artificial blood from yesterday's story?

    --

    If your only tool is a hammer, every problem becomes a nail.

  6. Re:Waste by nine-times · · Score: 4, Funny

    What's funny is that my first reaction as I read the article was, "doesn't yeast produce wastes that are foreign and toxic to the human body?" And wouldn't you know it, the next section was entitled, "Waste problem". Guess they're reading my mind. :-P

    What I want to know: is there any chance that they could get the yeast to continually produce alcohol from the glucose in your blood? I want an implant that makes it so keeping me drunk will be as simple as eating a donut.

  7. Two Possibilities by molotovjester · · Score: 2, Funny

    Runaway Yeast Infection = Spontaneous Human Combustion?

    Or

    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=coppertop

  8. Re:Waste by tsalmark · · Score: 4, Funny

    Alcohol is a common yeast waste. So long as I'm not hit with a sin tax, I'm all for it.

  9. Re:'Creepy?' by K.+S.+Kyosuke · · Score: 4, Funny

    Especially since it allows one to brag on Slashdot about being an Atomic Man. "Hey, babe, I live off plutonium. How cool is that?"

    --
    Ezekiel 23:20
  10. yeah right.... by inerlogic · · Score: 3, Funny

    you lost me at "Canadian researchers"

    1. Re:yeah right.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      you lost me at "Canadian researchers"

      Hey, I go to that university! I'm sure there are some researchers somewhere around here somewhere... I'll go check the faculty pub.

  11. Re:Diabetes Management by ArcherB · · Score: 5, Funny

    If this were used to power a glucose meter and microprocessor, and throttled appropriately, could it be used to manage blood sugar for diabetics?

    Until the yeast gets smart enough to figure out that it can fudge the results to feed itself.

    --
    There is no "I disagree" mod for a reason. Flamebait, Troll, and Overrated are not substitutes.
  12. Can there be any doubt... by hyades1 · · Score: 2, Funny

    ...the science fiction/teen slasher movie that's bound to come out of this will have the words "mutant" and "beer" in the title?

    --
    I've calculated my velocity with such exquisite precision that I have no idea where I am.
  13. Anyone having a Strange Brew flashback? by Phizzle · · Score: 5, Funny

    Sorry, but when I saw the summation about Canadian scientists and beer yeast on April 1st, my mind immediately went to some kind of mutated Bob & Doug McKenzie flashback.

    Doug McKenzie: I am your father, Luke. Give in to the dark side of the force, you knob.
    Bob McKenzie: He saw Jedi 17 times, eh.
    Doug McKenzie: Hey I just thought of something, what if we could harness the power of the force from the beer yeast that would feed on human blood? Somekinda Vampire beer power, eh?
    Bob McKenzie: Take off, eh!

    --
    I will not be pushed, filed, stamped, indexed, briefed, debriefed or numbered. My life is my own.
  14. Re:Waste by shadowbearer · · Score: 3, Funny

      Having a large portion of the human species operating at a low level of alcoholic intoxication would hardly be more damaging than what we already have ;)

    SB

    --
    It's old. The more humans I meet, the more I like my cats. At least they are honest.
  15. A dream come true... by Perp+Atuitie · · Score: 2, Funny

    My own private vampire.

  16. Re:Waste by Hoi+Polloi · · Score: 2, Funny

    "I'm noth drunkth offizer...hic!...I'vvve goth a pacemaker...hic!"

    --
    It is by the juice of the coffee bean that thoughts acquire speed, the teeth acquire stains. The stains become a warning
  17. Re:Yikes by Hoi+Polloi · · Score: 4, Funny

    Man comes staggering into Dunkin Doughnuts....

    "For god's sake give me a crueller!"

    --
    It is by the juice of the coffee bean that thoughts acquire speed, the teeth acquire stains. The stains become a warning
  18. ...it functions for the life of the patient... by tlambert · · Score: 2, Funny

    "Running a device off of the human metabolism is an excellent way to ensure that it functions for the life of the patient."

    Uh, all these devices function for the life of the patient, give or take a few minutes...

    -- Terry

  19. Re:Waste by saskboy · · Score: 2, Funny

    An alcoholic "tape worm" if you will? I picture a micro-Bender drinking all of my beer inside my small intestine.

    --
    Saskboy's blog is good. 9 out of 10 dentists agree.
  20. Re:Waste by pcgabe · · Score: 4, Funny

    I want an implant that makes it so keeping me drunk will be as simple as eating a donut.

    Leading to a new national chain of "Drunkin' Donuts"

    --
    Don't put advice in your sig.
  21. Re:Waste by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    'I'm not a guy'

    CADIE, is that you?

  22. Robo Cop by Zygamorph · · Score: 2, Funny

    Great now robo cop HAS to stop for donuts every so often.

  23. Re:How About Weight Loss? by Zarf · · Score: 2, Funny

    Call me when they figure out how to install a giant energy burner that does nothing but burn energy.

    We call those "muscles".

    They take a bit of effort to get, but pretty much anyone's capable if they genuinely want to lose weight.

    I tried these muscle things and they need to work out some of the bugs in the control scheme. For example my double jump isn't nearly high enough.

    --
    [signature]