Slashdot Mirror

← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)

Biden Reveals Location of Secret VP Bunker

Posted by CmdrTaco on from the so-it's-the-basement-then dept.

Hugh Pickens writes "Fox News reports that 'Vice President Joe Biden, well-known for his verbal gaffes, may have finally outdone himself, divulging potentially classified information meant to save the life of a sitting vice president.' According to the report, while recently attending the Gridiron Club dinner in Washington, an annual event where powerful politicians and media elite get a chance to cozy up to one another, Biden told his dinnermates about the existence of a secret bunker under the old US Naval Observatory, which is now the home of the vice president. Although earlier reports had placed the Vice-Presidential hide-out in a highly secure complex of buildings inside Raven Rock Mountain near Blue Ridge Summit, Pennsylvania, Fox News reports that the Naval Observatory bunker is believed to be the secure, undisclosed location former Vice President Dick Cheney remained under protection in secret after the 9/11 attacks. According to the report, Biden 'said a young naval officer giving him a tour of the residence showed him the hideaway, which is behind a massive steel door secured by an elaborate lock with a narrow connecting hallway lined with shelves filled with communications equipment.' According to Eleanor Clift, Newsweek magazine's Washington contributing editor 'the officer explained that when Cheney was in lock down, this was where his most trusted aides were stationed, an image that Biden conveyed in a way that suggested we shouldn't be surprised that the policies that emerged were off the wall.' In December 2002, neighbors complained of loud construction work being done at the Naval Observatory, which has been used as a residence by vice presidents since 1974. The upset neighbors were sent a letter by the observatory's superintendent, calling the work 'sensitive in nature' and 'classified' and that it was urgent it be completed on a highly accelerated schedule."

11 of 550 comments (clear)

  1. Yeah, real big secret by jollyreaper · · Score: 5, Funny

    Sounds like one of those open secrets like "When did the shuttle launch?"

    "Sorry, it's carrying a classified military payload and we cannot comment on it."

    "I heard a loud rumble at 2pm and saw a pillar of fire rising from the Cape. Was that the shuttle?"

    "We can neither confirm nor deny."

    "Then I'll post it on the internet."

    "ZOMG!!!! Teh tarrists know everything now! Throw this man in prison!"

    --
    Kwisatz Haderach
    Sell the spice to CHOAM
    This Mahdi took Shaddam's Throne
    1. Re:Yeah, real big secret by jgtg32a · · Score: 5, Funny

      Granted he didn't give anything useful away. I figured the only reason anyone cared is because Biden is a senile old man and its always fun to hear them say things they aren't suppose to.

    2. Re:Yeah, real big secret by Jhon · · Score: 4, Funny

      The reason there were no convictions was that Scooter took the fall for obstruction and perjury. Bush commuted his sentence before he spilled his guts.

      And this was coordinated by the Skull and Bones wing of the Free Masons working in conjunction with the Bavarian Illuminati. They receive their funding from the Rothchilds, you know.

      Of course, your claims are only valid if Novak and everyone he cited is lying. But why let that stop you...

    3. Re:Yeah, real big secret by Chris+Burke · · Score: 5, Funny

      So let me get this straight...

      The "Undisclosed Location" where we hide the Vice President in times of national emergency when we fear for their safety and the line of succession to lead the nation...

      is underneath the "Disclosed Location" where the Vice Presidents lived since the 70s??

      That'd be like Batman hiding his Secret Bat Lair underneath Wayne Manor, if Batman had already fully disclosed that Batman is Bruce Wayne.

      I mean I guess it's one of those "They'd never think to look for him there!" just-crazy-enough-to-work kinds of plans... Or is it just-crazy-enough-to-fail-hilariously?

      --

      The enemies of Democracy are
    4. Re:Yeah, real big secret by SwordsmanLuke · · Score: 5, Funny

      And it would have made great television!

      --
      Any plan which depends on a fundamental change in human behavior is doomed from the start.
  2. Always a source of amusment by m0s3m8n · · Score: 5, Funny

    Ahh, the Dem. version of Dan Quayle.

    --
    Conservative, mod down for violating /. political norms.
    1. Re:Always a source of amusment by larry+bagina · · Score: 5, Funny

      It's assasination insurance.

      --
      Do you even lift?

      These aren't the 'roids you're looking for.

    2. Re:Always a source of amusment by JamesP · · Score: 5, Funny

      So:

      Tomato - Tomatoes
      Potato - Potatoes
      Oh No! - Oh Noes!

      --
      how long until /. fixes commenting on Chrome?
  3. So... by jayhawk88 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Does anyone currently have the job of following Biden around at all times with a tape player handy, ready to play the "Whaaah whaaah whhhaaaaaaahhhhh" sound whenever it's needed? Because that sounds like it would be a sweet gig.

    1. Re:So... by Loko+Draucarn · · Score: 5, Funny

      He's the Vice President of the United States.

      Surely they can spring for an actual trombonist.

  4. Re:Genius by wisty · · Score: 4, Funny

    Maybe it's just a broom closet. The secret service just tell Biden to practice "covering" in there whenever they need a break from him.