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What To Do With 78 USB Drives Next Christmas?
ArfBrookwood writes "Every year, I write a Christmas Letter and send it to about 50 people, and every year, it's different. One year it was just the word blah blah blah over and over with keywords, one year I made papercraft wallets with full color cards and money in them, another year I created a Christmas Letter writing contest that instructed the recipients to create our Christmas Letter for us and we awarded prizes to winners, last year, I took a fake retro photo of my family, Inkscaped/GIMPed in a chemistry set and some wall art, printed it onto CD covers, and burned retro Christmas songs onto digital vinyl and sent everyone in the family what looked like a miniature Christmas album. Last week, I came into the possession of 78 2GB USB drives. I have already taken the time to wipe them clean and reflash the memory so they are blank slates." Now, Arf's looking for suggestions for how to best use all these drives; read on for more.
"My first inclination was to remove the USB drives from their careful packaging and plastic enclosures, dump them into a slurry of glue and rock dust, sandpaper the USB port to make it look ancient, and then make some videos or include some oddly formatted numbered/whatever text files to make them look like they cam from some dystopian wasteland fallout-3 type future and then package them in envelopes that looked like they were from some central futuristic government post office. The idea would be that in the future, incidents that happened this year would have had a profound affect on the future. I never tell anyone what the Christmas Letter will look like, and I have only one rule — I have to outdo whatever I did the last year."
"My first inclination was to remove the USB drives from their careful packaging and plastic enclosures, dump them into a slurry of glue and rock dust, sandpaper the USB port to make it look ancient, and then make some videos or include some oddly formatted numbered/whatever text files to make them look like they cam from some dystopian wasteland fallout-3 type future and then package them in envelopes that looked like they were from some central futuristic government post office. The idea would be that in the future, incidents that happened this year would have had a profound affect on the future. I never tell anyone what the Christmas Letter will look like, and I have only one rule — I have to outdo whatever I did the last year."
Load them all down with child pornography and give them to Richard Stallman for him to "dispose of."
You can fit a full length divx rip of a porno on them. Not the gay butt diving stuff you like tho, so skip that.
Offhand I'd say, get a life.
Why don't you shove them up your ass you fucking douchebag. Not you, NervousNerd. I'm talking to Arf. You sound like a real fucking cunt. If somebody sent me shit like that for christmas, I would personally deliver a baseball bat, and a severe beating to go along with it. Then, while you're lying on the floor in a pool of your own blood (not to mention my piss), I'll make your wife eat out my asshole.
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Then squish out a moist, steamy loaf into her mouth and cup your hand over it.
Bigblacknigger! I missed you. Please dialate my loosened Mac-using butthole with your manly rollo rocket!
What is "ppl"? Is that supposed to be the plural of "psn"? Grow a brain, get a spellchecker, or don't type in SMS-speak on anything but SMS.
you sound like a pretentious loser.
how about not trying so hard to look smahht.
I'm sure your christmas letter schtick is actually because you are poking fun at the self-indulgent nature of such things. Fine. But a better approach is to just ignore it altogether and shut the fuck up.
shove all of them up your ass, and mail them to everyone.
here's what you can do: pound them up your ass, you self-serving braggart piece of shit
Also, he could shove them up his arse with a little vaseline and hopefully that will stop him writing shit!
All the ways you wish you could be, that's me. I look like you wanna look, I fhuk like you wanna fhuk, I am smart, capable, and most importantly, I am free in all the ways that you are not.
6.8SPC TR of 550, l xwind at 6, drift rt at 26" drops 77". AT has 503 ft-lbs at 1403 fps. FT 0.86
of ur d***
> I guess I'm just strange, enjoying hearing from friends.
If you don't "hear from" these people a great deal more frequently than once a year, calling them your "friends" is worse than strange. It's really really sad. It makes me think you don't have any *actual* friends at all.
Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.