Slashdot Mirror

← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)

Research Determines Women Can Keep a Secret For 47 Hours

Posted by samzenpus on from the misogynistic-research dept.

A study of 3,000 women aged 18-65 has found that the average woman cannot keep a secret for longer than 47 hours. The study also found that four out of ten admitted that they were unable to keep a secret, no matter how personal or private. Michael Cox, UK Director of Wines of Chile, which commissioned the research, said, "It's official - women can't keep secrets. We were really keen to find out with this survey how many secrets people are told. What we didn't bank on was how quickly these are passed on by those we confide in. No matter how precious the piece of information, it's often out in the public domain within 48 hours."

13 of 72 comments (clear)

  1. That sucks! by VeNoM0619 · · Score: 3, Funny

    That sucks! Now everyone will know about my Pokemon collection in 2 days!

    --
    Disclaimer: I am not god.
    We may not be created equal
    But we can be treated equal.
    1. Re:That sucks! by freakygal · · Score: 2, Funny

      Agree. If I manage to keep a secret for more than 48hours is because I forgot about the secret itself...

    2. Re:That sucks! by clone53421 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Whoops, you kinda spilled the beans there didn't ya. But don't worry, we won't tell anyone... good thing there are no women on slashdot or you'd have really been in trouble.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
  2. The three fastest means of communication by CorporateSuit · · Score: 4, Funny

    Television, Telephone, Tell a woman.

    --
    I am the richest astronaut ever to win the superbowl.
  3. Sexism at its finest by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Informative

    No, but really, every single woman I've ever know does the exact same thing upon hearing a secret:

    1.) Hear secret and promise Friend #1 she won't tell anyone.
    2.) Deliberately jump into a conversation with Acquaintance #1 and bring up something trivial and unrelated. This step is important. If it doesn't happen, it wasn't really a secret.
    3.) Promptly call Friend #2 and in a hushed but still CLEARLY audible voice, tell the secret.
    4.) Commence calling everyone she knows in order of familiarity. With each new person in on it, talk becomes less quiet and forbidden.
    5.) Inevitably hears the secret back from someone else.
    6.) Speak about secret openly to everyone until it gets old.

  4. Who wins by unlametheweak · · Score: 2, Insightful

    It would be more relevant if they included men in this study. I've found both sexes to be untrustworthy. Normal, socialized humans appear to have an instinct for being immoral.

    1. Re:Who wins by Linuxmonger · · Score: 5, Funny

      If everyone is doing a thing, it is not immoral, it is natural, like Pirate Bay.

    2. Re:Who wins by Kokuyo · · Score: 3, Insightful

      We usually call people who don't lie and cheat socially inept. There is a 'too honest' if you want to get along with your peers.

      Now I'm not saying that this is not a very damning situation for a race to be in, but there you have it.

    3. Re:Who wins by unlametheweak · · Score: 2, Insightful

      We usually call people who don't lie and cheat socially inept.

      Yes I've been called "socially inept" as well. I've also been called a "loser", amongst other things.

      There is a 'too honest' if you want to get along with your peers.

      Yeah, I've noticed that people who don't back-stab, peer pressure each other to demonize scape goats to promote social cohesion often end up being demonized themselves when they end up on the news (like Columbine and Virgina tech). Too bad people spend too much time defending their own immorality instead of treating people with respect so that these massacres would not need to occur.

  5. Troll science? by straponego · · Score: 3, Insightful

    The survey was commissioned by the Wines of Chile? One wonders how rigorous this study was, especially given they don't mention asking the obvious alternative group, men. It sounds almost like an Onion article.

    It does match my experience, but in general men aren't that great at secrets either-- we just don't find most gossip as interesting. I, for one, forget most of it almost as fast as my gf tells me... Still: never tell a girl something you don't want people talking about the next day. Women are a lot like Facebook, in a way... you don't get to complain about them doing what they do.

  6. Re:Depends on the woman by palegray.net · · Score: 4, Funny

    Are you fully aware of where you're posting?

    --
    512 MB RAM, 20 GB disk, 200 GB transfer, five datacenters. $19.95/month.
  7. Why tell a secret by EmNote · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Women tell secrets either because they like the feeling of power or authority when spilling information or because of the response they get from the people they tell, a feeling of importance and acceptance.

  8. Re:Depends on the woman by brainfsck · · Score: 2, Insightful

    This is why astrology is so powerful.

    Obligatory Maddox link.