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What If They Turned Off the Internet?

Posted by timothy on from the very-funny-now-where-is-slashdot dept.

theodp writes "It's the not-too-distant future. They've turned off the Internet. After the riots have settled down and the withdrawal symptoms have faded, how would you cope? Cracked.com asked readers to Photoshop what life would be like in an Internet-addicted society learning to cope without it. Better hope it never happens, or be prepared for dry-erase message boards, carrier pigeon-powered Twitter, block-long lines to get into adult video shops, door-to-door Rickrolling, Lolcats on Broadway, and $199.99 CDs."

8 of 511 comments (clear)

  1. twentytwelve by Shadow+Wrought · · Score: 4, Funny

    Isn't this what the Mayan's prophisied for 2012?

    --
    If brevity is the soul of wit, then how does one explain Twitter?
  2. Work? by Ogive17 · · Score: 4, Funny

    I'd probably get some work done... though I'm not sure how since our data is stored in Colorado and I'm in Ohio.

    --
    "Action without philosophy is a lethal weapon; philosophy without action is worthless."
  3. Re:OMG by sopssa · · Score: 4, Funny

    But we'd have no more lost carrier jokes, so it might balance out.

    You would think so. Whole world would be filled with nerds running all around yelling LOST CARRIER, LOST CARRIER!!

  4. new poll by tloh · · Score: 4, Funny

    What would replace the internet?

    a)sneaker net
    b)ip over avian carriers
    c)johnny mnemonic
    d)radio killed the itunes store
    e)cowboy neal
    f)breasts (the live nude version on a real female)

    --
    Stay sentient. Don't drink bad milk.
  5. Re:South Park had this covered by skine · · Score: 4, Funny

    I think that if you actually look into it, you'll find that The Simpsons covered all of the topics even before South Park did.

  6. Re:Uhm... wrong site. by Brian+Gordon · · Score: 4, Funny

    I have been on /. since it launched (yeah, back then we nerds were quite resistant to ever creating logins for sites, hence my non-low account ID).

    Uhhh yeah me too

  7. Re:Oblig. South Park Quote by Hurricane78 · · Score: 5, Funny

    That was the best quote you could manage? You missed out on the epic chance to quote

    "We can't go back to Playboy now!"

    --
    Any sufficiently advanced intelligence is indistinguishable from stupidity.
  8. Re:What would happen if Microsoft turned it off by John+Hasler · · Score: 5, Funny

    > All it would take is one really bad Windows Update to turn off 70% of the
    > Internet.

    Yes but we're discussing the part that would actually be missed.

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    Warning: this article may contain humor, sarcasm, parody, and perhaps even irony. Read at your own risk.