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The Jet Fighter Laser Cannon

Posted by kdawson on from the back-of-the-shark-calculation dept.

fahrbot-bot sends in a Register piece about DARPA issuing the penultimate contract for what is intended to be a jet-mounted laser cannon. The Reg outdoes itself in a BOTEC involving downsizing to shark scale. "The US military will shortly issue a brace of contracts for 'refrigerator sized' laser blaster cannons. One of the deals will see a full-power ground prototype built which will be the final stage prior to America's first raygun-equipped jet fighter. ... If it scales down far enough, this would seem to put handheld HELL-guns within an order of magnitude of the striking power offered by conventional small-arms. A 9mm pistol bullet has about 750 joules muzzle energy: a 5kg portable HELL-ray weapon would put out this much energy in a blast less than a second long. ... A dolphin can carry a human being weighing up to 100kg along for a ride. A thoroughbred shark in good training can surely match this. Thus, we seem to be looking at practicable head-[laser] output in the 20-kilowatt range."

11 of 464 comments (clear)

  1. Tags by Shadyman · · Score: 4, Funny

    Ok, I see the obligatory "sharks" tag, but what about the "pewpewpew" tag?

    1. Re:Tags by Have+Brain+Will+Rent · · Score: 4, Funny

      And what the heck are thoroughbred sharks? What? Like a mongrel shark isn't good enough to carry a laser now? Damn discrimination everywhere.

      --
      The tyrant will always find a pretext for his tyranny - Aesop
    2. Re:Tags by Genda · · Score: 4, Funny

      Hmmmm... Sharks vs. Jets... I presume this implies a "Westside Story" tag as well...

  2. The Future by colmore · · Score: 4, Funny

    When I read the summary I wondered if they'd be putting one of those on flying robot drones and then I realized that yes, it's 2009 and we live in the fucking future.

    --
    In Capitalist America, bank robs you!
  3. Re:9mm? by kalirion · · Score: 4, Funny

    Really? Compare the USP and the Glock pistols in Counter-Strike - which one does more damage?

  4. Re:9mm? by geekoid · · Score: 5, Funny

    the knife:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cudCajMNRM0&feature=player_embedded

    --
    The Kruger Dunning explains most post on /. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect
  5. Re:Acronym of an acronym? by Drishmung · · Score: 4, Funny

    Then I take it GNU renders you apoplectic.

    --
    Protoplasm. Quiet Protoplasm. I like quiet protoplasm.
  6. Re:why is this word never used correctly? by hey! · · Score: 5, Funny

    It begs the question of why people use big sounding words and phrases they obviously don't understand. It literally makes my head explode.

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    Post may contain irony: discontinue use if experiencing mood swings, nausea or elevated blood pressure.
  7. Laser blasters are the weapons of barbarians. by 140Mandak262Jamuna · · Score: 5, Funny

    I would like an elegant weapon from an more civilized age.

    --
    sed -e 's/Chuck Norris/Rajnikant/g' joke > fact
  8. Re:Mirrors by Grenamier · · Score: 5, Funny

    How can you guys deflect protons when you're being so negative?

    --
    -- John Truong
  9. Re:Penultimate means "second from last" by Chris+Burke · · Score: 4, Funny

    Michelangelo: I've got it! I've got it! We'll call it "The Last But One Supper"!

    Pope: What?

    Michelangelo: Well there must have been one, if there was a last supper there must have been a one before that, so this, is the "Penultimate Supper"! The Bible doesn't say how many people were there now, does it?

    Pope: No, but...

    Michelangelo: Well there you are, then!

    Pope: Look! The last supper is a significant event in the life of our Lord, the penultimate supper was not! Even if they had a conjurer and a mariachi band. Now, a last supper I commissioned from you, and a last supper I want! With twelve disciples and one Christ!

    Michelangelo: One?!

    --

    The enemies of Democracy are