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NYT's "Games To Avoid" an Ironic, Perfect Gamer Wish List
MojoKid writes "From October to December, the advertising departments of a thousand companies exhort children to beg, cajole, and guilt-trip their parents for all manner of inappropriate digital entertainment. As supposedly informed gatekeepers, we sadly earthbound Santas are reduced to scouring the back pages of gaming review sites and magazines, trying to evaluate whether the tot at home is ready for Big Bird's Egg Hunt or Bayonetta. Luckily, The New York Times is here to help. In a recent article provokingly titled 'Ten Games to Cross off Your Child's Gift List,' the NYT names its list of big bads — the video games so foul, so gruesome, so perverse that we'd recommend you buy them immediately — for yourself. Alternatively, if you need gift ideas for the surly, pale teenager in your home whose body contains more plastic then your average d20, this is the newspaper clipping to stuff in your pocket. In other words, if you need a list like this to understand what games to not stuff little Johnny's stocking with this holiday season, you've got larger issues you should concern yourself with. We'd suggest picking up an auto-shotty and taking a few rounds against the horde — it's a wonderful stress relief and you're probably going to need it."
"Actually, the article is far less irritating than the summary had led me to believe."
You must be new around here.
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage? - Pink Floyd.
Yeah, it teaches kids that getting drunk, wasted, and trashing the universe is alright.
you scrumming with three guys isn't the image we needed
Dragon Age: Origins
I wonder if it isn't solely for the blood that will cover all your characters after even a minor fight. It made subsequent conversations with the characters rather surreal... there never was a conversation choice "Eh, do you know you are completely covered in blood?".
At least until I found the configuration option that turned this 'feature' off.
Tetris is a comunist look at destroying the building blocks of modern society. This is why the straight piece which clears all those lines is RED.
:R - the tongue in cheek smilie
Don't let the simple graphics fool you.
It could also be a FPS in which you play a block trying to kill other blocks and keep respawning as new blocks every few minutes
but all those moralists that are actually sick minded pervs can see the fitting of tetris pieces together to be a vaguely sexual act!
With all those pieces fitting perfectly together it's probably the most sexual game ever! Oh baby!
Funny, all my kids' games have parental control? Don't everyone's?
You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
M for "Mmmmm..."
We all know how effective the X or M ratings are for movies. If you're 16 and at the Cineplex Engorgia, are you going to go to see the film with the big "R" or the one with the "GP-13"?
The GP stands for "Good Picture" and the "R" stands for "Really Good Picture". If you're lucky enough to find NC-17, it means there are "No Clothes on the 17 year-old Girls".
You are welcome on my lawn.
Tetris is a comunist look at destroying the building blocks of modern society. This is why the straight piece which clears all those lines is RED.
It's far more sinister than that. Not only it's red, but it's also straight, long, and it falls on the poor, innocent bricks from the sky. Clearly, it's a Soviet ICBM, and vaporized blocks represent annihilated American cities!
We are agreed then, ban all 'holy' books.
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on