Slashdot Mirror
Best Man Rigs Newlyweds' Bed To Tweet During Sex
When an UK man was asked to be the best man at a friend's wedding he agreed that he would not pull any pranks before or during the ceremony. Now the groom wishes he had extended the agreement to after the blessed occasion as well. The best man snuck into the newlyweds' house while they were away on their honeymoon and placed a pressure-sensitive device under their mattress. The device now automatically tweets when the couple have sex. The updates include the length of activity and how vigorous the act was on a scale of 1-10.
That's a pretty trivial filtering problem. It looks like it's all based on a set of load cells, so the question is if you look at the down forces on, say, the four corners of your bed what does sex "look" like? Fourier transforms would convert running measurements to frequency measurements. I'd say you look for a minimum of 5-10 seconds of oscillations at a given frequency (anything from maybe 1 to 10Hz). You then require a 2+ minute span of continuing recurrences. Filter out total weights that indicate only one person (or, you know, don't). Figure peak, average, and maybe std deviation of the frequency/ampitude spectrum recored for the "event" and use those numbers to do your "grading".
This is the reason *I* went to college.