How Apple Orchestrates Controlled Leaks, and Why
Lanxon writes "'I was a Senior Marketing Manager at Apple and I was instructed to do some controlled leaks,' confesses John Martellaro. Monday's article at the Wall Street Journal, which provided confirmation of an Apple tablet device, had all the earmarks of a controlled leak. Here's how Apple does it. Often Apple has a need to let information out, unofficially. The company has been doing that for years, and it helps preserve Apple's consistent, official reputation for never talking about unreleased products. The way it works is that a senior exec will come in and say, 'We need to release this specific information. John, do you have a trusted friend at a major outlet? If so, call him/her and have a conversation. Idly mention this information and suggest that if it were published, that would be nice. No e-mails!'"
Here's a better way for Apple to test the reaction to their products:
1) Get together a bunch of homosexuals. There are plenty just up the road from Cupertino, in San Fran. Line them up with their backs to a wall.
2) Put a prototype of the Apple device inside of a box. Smear some human feces on it, to ensure accurate results. Seal it up, so the device isn't visible.
3) While holding the box containing the new device, walk past the homosexuals.
4) Record the total number of erections. Apple fanatics can sense the Apple products, even through the box and a layer of crap, and will become VERY excited.
5) Anything beyond 80% will surely be a success with the typical Apple market. Mass produce the device.
6) Profit.
"How DARE they not fellate Father Steve!!!"
Fix'd for you.
-1 Troll in 5...4...3...
That's awful, and you should be modded down as a troll.
Personally, I have made a New Year's resolution to never again impugn the masculinity of Apple users, after I did so once, and received many replies from them, threatening to give me such a slap.
Really.
Often, nobody really cares what's going on at Apple.
"What?", irate resondents to this comment will say. "Everybody cares about what is happening at Apple!"
Yes, there is a lot of simulated hype. Bushels and bushels of it. That's the primary product at Apple.
Yes, I am posting this at Apple.slashdot.org so I expect a little flaming.
and return it to Apple for repairs 4 months after that