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iPhone 4 News Roundup
We have a slew of iPhone 4-related stories this morning, so I'm lumping them together for easier consumption/ignoring, depending on your personal feelings on the subject.
Here is a blog entry proclaiming that iOS 4 multitasking sucks and why. Here is a sketchy summary of privacy violations by Apple and AT&T — apparently they are reporting back jailbroken phones. Skunkpost has a story about the lines and sales of the new phone. But the big news of the morning is the reception problems that apparently only affect people who hold the phone in their left hands.
Summary of the mass media today:
iPhone4!!! OMG!! OMG! iPhones! 4! OMG!
That's about it.
Seriously people, don't buy your own golden cage.
Apple does it again, say Wall Street analysts. As millions of Apple fans queue up worldwide to pay $700 for a phone that has poor reception, shitty multi-tasking, and serious design flaws, Wall Street has been pouring accolades on the company.
"Big business is all about finding idiots, and then taking their money," said one analyst. "Clearly, Apple is at the top of heap right now."
Bill Gates was forced to agree. "In Microsoft's prime, we could get away with some of what Apple does. Restrictive DRM, vendor lock-in. But Steve is getting people to wait in line for a phone that can't complete phone calls." Bill Gates added, "Let me repeat that. A phone that barely serves it's primary purpose. Chalk it up to marketing, I guess."
Tom Stevens, a grad student without a job, explained Apple's success. "Before, when Microsoft was telling us what we could and couldn't do with our stuff, it was intolerable. How could anyone put up with that kind of behavior from a corporation?"
"But now? Apple gets it. Have you seen their ads? I can make a movie on my phone with my phone! Computers are finally about me." Stevens proudly displayed his new video of cut shots of his breakfast. "I haven't been able to send it to anyone yet - with the reception here I usually have to get some WiFi. Phone calls, forget about it. But look at that sepia effect! Classic."
Added Stevens, "Thank god I had enough room on my last credit card."
Remember, we're dealing with an Apple product here. You have to be careful what you place around them because you don't want to mess up the Reality Distortion Field. Aside from voiding the warranty and causing brain cancer it can induce the user to frequent dark, unclean parts of the Internet and thus get your Apple Acolyte(TM) card revoked. Bad things all.
A little Kool-Aid might do the trick, though.
Faster! Faster! Faster would be better!
The f***'n phone doesn't even work and everybody's talking about the "walled garden".
I own an iPhone, but I'd vastly prefer the open system we all know is never going to happen. Guess people around here just assume that posting anything contrary to dogma must be intended to piss people off.
Does that bother you? If you think of the iPhone as an appliance and not a computer, then it makes perfect sense.
What amazes me the most is reading comments on various sites, and realising that iPhone freaks think icon-grid is somehow invented by Apple, and they should sue Samsung/Google/whoever.
What the fuck? These people are becoming worse than Microsoft Windows 3.11 zealots. Wow.
The only problem with your plan is that nobody else Really cares. And other phones all seem to suck one kind of ass or another.