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BP Robot Seriously Hampers Oil Spill Containment
ChiefMonkeyGrinder writes
"A high-tech effort by BP to slow the oil gushing from its ruptured well head led to a large accident yesterday that forced the company to remove a vital containment cap for 10 hours. Robots, known as remote operated vehicles, were performing multiple operations at the disaster site when one bumped into the 'top hat' cap and damaged one of the vents that removes excess fluid, according to the US Coast Guard. The robots weigh around four tons, and are controlled from vessels on the surface using advanced IT systems with both manual and automated functions. BP removed the cap for nearly 10 hours ... in order to assess it after a discharge of liquids was noted from a key valve. The cap's removal left the oil gushing out of the wellhead, largely uninterrupted. Admiral Thad Allen, US National Incident Commander for the response, told the media that part of the problem was the number of robots conducting simultaneous operations at an immense depth. A dozen robots are circulating the wellhead."
Another factor that may hinder containment even more is the increasing potential for tropical storms in that area of the Gulf.
Welcome our new robot underlords.
... and then they built the supercollider.
It's time to get the pros in to finally take care of this mess. Might I suggest the Keystone Cops?
So the well is alive now and needs to have a platoon of 4-ton robotic pacemakers?
What would a robot's ideal soup be? Hot soup would interfere with the cooling systems, so it would have to be cold, it's a robot, so obviously petroleum would be a must, and needs a good amount of salt. Oh, hey, robot soup is oil in ocean water.
This whole mess is probably caused by robots trying to get delicious, delicious robot soup.
Admiral Thad Allen, US National Incident Commander for the response, told the media that part of the problem was the number of robots conducting simultaneous operations at an immense depth. A dozen robots are circulating the wellhead.
The operators got bored, and decided to play a few rounds of Robot Wars . . .
Schroedinger's Brexit: The UK is both in and out of the EU at the same time!
What was that robot thinking?
"The key to great robot cooking is to start with a good oil... and eat it" - Bender
I thought pouring oil on troubled waters was supposed to calm them!
I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
Aquaman would do what we already can but won't allow ourselves to do: plug the leak with dolphins.
These days, suddenly, everybody is a petroleum engineer.
Table-ized A.I.
Maybe if BP drilled for vinegar, and just let all that flow out as well . . . they could turn the whole disaster into a tasty salad dressing?
Schroedinger's Brexit: The UK is both in and out of the EU at the same time!
That reminds me, where did I leave that mile long pipe? I must have dropped it somewhere, if found please call... Assume it will launch and hit the moon (given BP's luck it will) then knock it off its axis and crash into North America causing the west coast to sink into the Pacific and I guess Mr DontBlama will put that bill on BP as well but dont worry BP money is endless right?......
How many LoC's is a shitton and how many Shittonnes does that equal?
"The problem with socialism is eventually you run out of other people's money" - Thatcher.
Depends whether you're talking about long shittons, or short shittons.
A long shitton is 1.12 short shittons, and a long shitton is also close enough to a Shittonne that it makes no appreciable difference.
The real question is, how many Shittonnes in a MetricFuckload?
One Shittonne equals 10 MetricFuckloads, or a decaMetricFuckload. Or, more readable, a deciShittonne equals a metric fuckload.
"City hall" in German is "Rathaus" Kinda explains a few things......
He was probably on a cell phone.
Yeah, I think McDonalds would be far better suited. They know how to handle oil.
Dead cows don't give milk.
But they do give delicious steak.