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Chinese News Reports the Taliban Are Training Monkey Soldiers

Posted by samzenpus on from the I-want-to-shoot-like-you-oo-oo dept.

According to a Chinese news publication, soldiers in Afghanistan may soon come up against a deadly new weapon in the war: monkey soldiers. The report claims that the Taliban are training the monkeys to shoot and kill American soldiers. They also claim to have pictures of monkeys holding AK-47s and Bren light machine guns. From the article: "The New York Magazine has reported about this in jest and stated on Friday, 'No invader has ever conquered Afghanistan, and now we know why. The monkeys will not allow it. It was a good effort, but it's time to pack it in. This is no longer a fight we can win.'”

4 of 232 comments (clear)

  1. Best be careful.... by daemonenwind · · Score: 5, Funny

    If you start arming monkeys, you end up with a banana republic.

  2. Re:How to counter.... by countertrolling · · Score: 5, Funny

    Coalition soldiers then walk in without a fight.

    Until the Taliban truck in a bunch of Playboy bunnies, weed, and Twinkies

    --
    For justice, we must go to Don Corleone
  3. Re:How to counter.... by AnonymousClown · · Score: 5, Funny

    Coalition soldiers then walk in without a fight.

    Until the Taliban truck in a bunch of Playboy bunnies, weed, and Twinkies

    War is Hell.

    --
    RIP America

    July 4, 1776 - September 11, 2001

  4. We're way ahead of them. by John+Hasler · · Score: 5, Funny

    The Marines have had guns for centuries.

    --
    Warning: this article may contain humor, sarcasm, parody, and perhaps even irony. Read at your own risk.