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7 Scientific Reasons a Zombie Outbreak Would Fail
Whether they spoil in the heat, freeze in the winter, or get taken out by a human-friendly venue of vultures, a zombie outbreak is unlikely to succeed. Here's 7 reasons why we should stop worrying about the shambling dead and start concentrating on a real threat: sparkly vampires.
You wouldn't be saying that if you'd met some of my managers.
Brain dead - check; stumbling through life - check; rampant desire to eat people's brains (or simply recruit them to their own viewpoint) - check.
QED.
davel
dot-sig.
If they let it die, it might rise again. Like. a. zombie. OMG!!!!!
No, that article is the reason cracked.com exists.
This response is the reason idle.slashdot.org exists.
7. Natural predators can become zombies, too. Then where will your living natural predators be, hmm?
6. Zombies rose from the dead, some years-dead. Making them deader by drying them out isn't going to affect them.
6. Zombies rose from the dead. Dead is even more inert than frozen. Therefore, frozen isn't going to faze them.
5. Biting works for rattlesnakes, black widow spiders, rabid dogs, and yucky girls with cooties. Zombies are onto a business model here.
3. It's not like we're picking a Zombie President early in the cycle. There are zillions of them. Damage to one leaves another undamaged. You can't beat them in reasonable time with iterative solutions.
2. You can run. You can hide. But death comes to us all. And then you'll be the zombie in the place behind the incorrectly designated zombie-proof barrier.
1. Unless you plan to make bullets out of zombie finger bones, you're going to run out of bullets before you run out of zombies. Zillions, man. Zillions.
Yes, there are two rule sixes, and NOOOOOOO...rule four. Clearly not a Python sketch.
There are two pages to the article. Why you link to the second one instead of the main one is beyond me.
Yes I know people complain about the editors and the like, but is it really that much to ask to link to the main page?
They're DEAD. As in no more. Ceased to be. Gone off to meet their maker. Bereft of life. Shuffled off their mortal coils.
I eat only the real part of complex carbohydrates.
and to date none of them sparkle in the sun.
Yet.
Zombie Strippers are okay though.
Thanks. You've ruined Zombie Christmas.
Zombies feed on brains. Thanks to our fine educational system, we'll starve them out.
Have gnu, will travel.
Zombies are the new vampires, and to date none of them sparkle in the sun.
Want to know why zombies are so cool? Because Hollywood will never be able to get 14 year old girls interested in crappy zombie romance/emo books and movies....
HA! I just wasted some of your bandwidth with a frivolous sig!
Oh my!
You ask to let it die, but what if it REFUSES to die. Like a zombie!
Keep telling yourself that. You'll be sorry one day when you don't run, and a zombie eats your face.
This is a hacked account, for which the owner can not be held responsible.
Most of the zombie fiction is just a different approach to RPG-style problem solving
Do you mean RPG-style like in ruchnoy protivotankoviy granatomyot or RPG-7? It's a good option but you can't really run while carrying it.
Keep telling yourself that. You'll be sorry one day when you don't run, and a zombie eats your face.
I think they just eat your brains.
Eclectic beats from Leeds, UK
handmadehands.co.uk
Grills glinting in the sunlight as they shuffle towards you.
No sig today...