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Patent Office Admits Truth — Things Are a Disaster
An anonymous reader writes "For years the US Patent and Trademark Office has published data to show how well it and the patent system were running. Under new leadership, the USPTO has begun to publish a dashboard of information, including a new look at questions like how long does it really take to get a final answer on whether you will receive a patent or not? The pat answer was, on the average, about 3 years. But with the new figures, it's obvious that the real number, when you don't play games with how you define a patent application, is six years. The backlog of patents is almost 730K. And the Commerce Department under the Obama administration wants the average down to 20 months. How does this happen? Only if everyone closes their eyes and pretends. It's time to take drastic action, like ending software patents. As it is, by the time companies get a software patent, there's little value to them because, after six years, the industry has already moved on."
I worked in my university's patent office (we help you file the necessary paperwork to the necessary people, not a real patent office). There were so many people that tried to patent things they did not invent or were just not patentable:
-A rock you put on your BBQ grill, then cook the steaks on your hot rock.
-Converting propane tanks into makeshift bomb shelters but cutting off one side and climbing inside
-A penny jar that had engraved markings on the side to tell you how much money you had (approx) if you only put pennies in it
-A cotton ball wrapped in string that you could light on fire with lighter fluid and 'play' with
And my personal favorite:
-A handshake machine, its just a mannequin arm that moves up and down on a small motor (the drawings made it look REALLY like a handjob machine)
And my personal favorite:
-A handshake machine,
?? I prefer the slapping machine:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8chY78oBcWM (move to 3:50)
Or the opposite, if you forget to empty it first.