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Police Publish 'An Introduction To PEDO BEAR'

According to this article, the San Luis Obispo County Sheriff's Department knows that Pedobear is an Internet joke, but that hasn't stopped them from trying to warn the public about him. Their most recent tool in the fight against internet memes is this public safety information bulletin entitled: "An Introduction to PEDO BEAR." I look forward to the bulletin warning parents about the dangers of children playing in Chocolate Rain.

13 of 324 comments (clear)

  1. Forget chocolate rain by suso · · Score: 5, Funny
    1. Re:Forget chocolate rain by spun · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I'll bite. Which way do cops lean? IMHO they lean towards "more jobs for cops with better pay and less work." This only looks right wing because their interests coincide with those of the right wing when it comes to "more jobs for cops with better pay and less work." Are cops for a balanced budget? Not if it means cuts for them. Are they for states rights? Not hardly! They are for cops' rights, they don't really care if they get them from the fed or the state. Socially, they may be somewhat conservative, especially when it comes to punishing criminals (of course.) And how do cops feel about unions? Great! As long as it is their union. Your union is useful as a cop employment program, you and or the boss need protection from each other, right? Overtime, baby!

      A lot of what looks like partisan politics on bothy sides is actually lazy, selfish politics and people only tend to agree with party planks that directly benefit them.

      --
      - None can love freedom heartily, but good men; the rest love not freedom, but license. -- John Milton
  2. really? by Pojut · · Score: 5, Insightful

    "We know that this is a joke, but we're going to approach it as if it's a serious thing."

    Your tax dollars at work, people.

    1. Re:really? by bistromath007 · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Actually, they should only know that it is a joke, because that second part is a pile of crap that the police basically made up so they wouldn't look stupid for kicking PedoBear out of ComicCon.

    2. Re:really? by Chris+Burke · · Score: 5, Funny

      Won't someone think of the CHILDREN !

      I'm pretty sure Pedobear has that covered.

      --

      The enemies of Democracy are
    3. Re:really? by Hoi+Polloi · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Their next pamphlets will be titled "Warning Parents! Ceiling Kitty Is Watching Your Family Masturbate!" and "Are Your Kids Getting Rickrolled?"

      --
      It is by the juice of the coffee bean that thoughts acquire speed, the teeth acquire stains. The stains become a warning
  3. Again paranoia rules the roost by antifoidulus · · Score: 5, Insightful

    This constant paranoia over pedophilia has gotten insane. While it is a terrible crime, the odds of your kid getting killed by an SUV dwarf the odds that they will get molested by a stranger(some studies suggest that the child knows the perpetrator about 90% of the time). Meanwhile fearful parents park their kids in front of some sort of glowing rectangle and let them eat themselves to an early grave because a guaranteed life of obesity seems somehow better than a slim(really slim if your properly educate and observe the children) chance that they will be molested.

    Furthermore the whole police state mentality is driving people who have these urges further and further underground. Dan Savage had a really interesting call on his podcast a few months back about someone who said he couldn't control his attraction to children. He hadn't molested anyone yet but he was scared he might, but thanks to the way the law is written now, if he seeks help the psychiatrist MUST report him to the cops where he will be thrown in prison and then booted out into a world where he is a pariah just for THOUGHTS he may have had. So instead of this man being able to seek professional help(which could include chemical castration), he is now forced to battle his demons on his own and is probably MORE likely to molest a kid than if he had been able to get help. But somehow Americans think that if they can use the police to arrest someone, they should no matter what the actual or perceived crime is.

    Don't get me wrong, I'm certainly not trying to minimize molestation, it's a real and terrible thing. But being irrationally afraid of the problem isn't going to make it go away and really isn't going to leave your children in a very healthy state when they grow up.

    1. Re:Again paranoia rules the roost by AnonymousClown · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Don't get me wrong, I'm certainly not trying to minimize molestation, it's a real and terrible thing.

      I find rather annoying that you had to be that explicit and make that statement even here on Slashdot.

      --
      RIP America

      July 4, 1776 - September 11, 2001

    2. Re:Again paranoia rules the roost by Ionized · · Score: 5, Informative

      what you are talking about has nothing to do with pedophilia. for one, the correct usage of pedophilia only refers to young, prepubescent children. being attracted to post-pubescent adolescents, teenagers and such (individuals that have mostly finished the physical maturation process - broad hips and bust in women, broad shoulders in men), is called ephebophilia, and is completely natural.

      modern society has seen fit to lump it in with pedophilia, and for some reason 18 is seen as a magical age where 'OK, now it's socially acceptable to be sexually attracted to this person' but has no basis in biology or (nonrecent) human society. from a biological perspective, we are PROGRAMMED to be attracted to individuals in the mid to upper teenage years, because they are most likely to bear healthy offspring. given the variation that can occur in individuals reaching physical maturity, it can be damn hard to differentiate between some 16 year olds and 20 year olds.

      For countless thousands of years, females were being married and having children at ages that would cause modern society to cringe, oftentimes to much older men, and it was the norm. Of course, recent advances in women's rights has probably had a lot to do with it, as now a female is treated as a human being with rights, as opposed to a piece of property that was to be married off for a dowry and social standing. but i digress.

      actual pedophilia would be the case of a significantly older individual taking advantage of their position of power to sexually abuse a young, prepubescent child who is either unable to stop the attacker, or is too young/confused/scared to make a decision on the matter. it is ALWAYS rape, because the child can never give true consent, because they simply can't really understand what is going on. this has been shown to usually cause significant mental trauma and long term effects to the child, who is often made to feel guilty and ashamed of the whole thing, possibly repressing the memories to cause a festering canker of mental scar tissue that will stick around forever.

      so... yeah. your anecdotes about horny young preteens and teenagers humping each other in the closet or hitting on older individuals is hardly relevant to the issue of pedophilia.

  4. What about Pedobears friends? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Scat Rat, Futa Cow, Shota Tiger, Yuri Bunny, Guro Dragon, S&M Horse, Furry Sheep, Yaoi Cock, Hetero Dog & Watersports Pig?

    Do they not even warrant a warning?

    1. Re:What about Pedobears friends? by scourfish · · Score: 5, Funny

      This seriously sounds like it could be the boss lineup for a Megaman X game.

  5. This makes perfect sense, knowing SLO Sheriff... by Bjorn_Redtail · · Score: 5, Funny

    This is obviously an attempt to stereotype all bears as pedophiles. This might make it politically easier to allow the hunting of brown and black bears in the county. It would also humiliate and shame the Downtown Association's bear that appears at farmers' market, helping to reduce the amount of "organic produce" in the county. Plus, it would allow the SLO Sheriff to seize the bear fountain in downtown SLO city, because it's "Just like the one that I [one of the deputies] wanted". Plus, it helps distract from other pressing issues. In fact, it makes a whole lot of sense for the Sheriff to issue an APB on pedobear.

  6. SLO Sheriff's Department is An Interesting Entity by BJ_Covert_Action · · Score: 5, Interesting

    I've been living around SLO now for six years or so. The Sherriff's Department is in a bit of an awkward position. On one hand, they have local politicians breathing down their necks to be tougher on crime. Between the Cal Poly party scene and the inevitable knee-jerk hatred of the college kids, there is definitely a sharp ideological divide between the SLOcals and the Polywags. On the other hand, there are some pretty high crime rate areas in the county (like my current town, Oceano) where violent crimes and gang activities are pretty common. Thus, the Sherriff's department is usually in a game of tug-o-war between what the county-seat residents demand (more enforcement in San Luis Obispo proper) and what is probably needed most (more enforcement in surrounding communities). As such, the Sherriff's department has to come up with a lot of unique ways of addressing odd problems.

    It wouldn't surprise me if this flier was released in response to some of the SLOcals shitting bricks over something one of their teenage kids read in an internet forum. However, the Sheriff's department probably doesn't want to spend any time or manpower on the issue. So they probably released the flier to shut the local whiners up while maintaining enough autonomy to do their real jobs. For what it's worth, every time I've dealt with a Sheriff deupty here, it's been pretty pleasant. One of them helped scrape me off the road when I crashed my motorcycle, and even gave me a ride home when I refused to go to the hospital. Another couple of them recognize me when I am jogging now and wave and say hi if they are outside of their cars. I've never had them stop me for trivial bullshit. I've never had them stop me period. It's always been SLO PD and the CHP that give me shit over ridiculous stuff.

    All in all, SLO county is a delightfully weird place to live. the SLO folk are so hell bent about maintaining a nice community that they pass all sorts of batshit insane, jerk off laws. For instance, just this year a city-wide ban on smoking was enacted. You can't smoke anywhere in public now, or within 20 feet of another person's residence. So if you smoke, you're screwed. Then there was the measure that made it so noise ordinance violations could be classified as "unruly gatherings" and, rather than simply fining the offenders, all members present can now be criminally prosecuted and arrested. As such, I'd hate to work for the Sheriff's department. They are stuck between trying to prevent real crimes (like the constant stabbings in Oceano, or the poaching of wildlife up in Cayucos) and pandering to a bunch of rich whiny twats that want to create the "perfect community." It's strange.