Prepare To Be Watched While You Watch a Movie

BussyB writes "Gaining entry to some movie theaters lately gives patrons an experience that is on par with going through a TSA security checkpoint at the airport. Then once you've gained access, there are cameras strategically positioned that record your every move. Unfortunately, the extent to which these companies monitor movie-goers is only going to get worse."

Comments

Heh

[Kireas]

In Soviet Russia...

Re:Heh

[TheKidWho]

Yo dawg, we heard you like to watch movies, so we put you in a movie so you can watch yourself watching a movie while you watch a movie!

Re:Heh

[RMH101]

see also:
Girl to Bond: "Nice watch".
Bond: "Omega"
Girl: (breathes) "...beautiful"

In the UK, film critic Mark Kermode let a successful campaign to have audiences shout "KERCHING!" at this point when watching the film. More of this kind of thing is required.

Re:Heh

[mcgrew]

There was a theater in Orlando in the early '80s that was a bar/theater where you could drink beer while watching. But I have yet to find a theater that you can pass a fattie around in while watching a comedy.

If you're stoned anough, even Jar Jar is amusing.

Re:Heh

[snowraver1]

If you're stoned anough, even Jar Jar is amusing.

Stop spreading your filthy lies!

Re:Heh

[spun]

Yes, mcgrew, but you are an old coot. Old coots have the privilege of being able to say crazy things like "I won't fly on no gol-durned airplane no more because the security people want to look at my wiener" or "I don't go to movies because they are watching me." I'm actually looking forward to my coot-hood. I'm going to believe in something really crazy, like the basic decency of human nature, or the perfectibility of mankind or something like that.

Will she go down on you in a theater?

[cindyann]

Apologies to Alanis Morrisette.

Think of the positives!

[happy_place]

Hey, this can't be all bad... With video feedback, perhaps movie professionals could automate audience reactions to various scenes, and systematically improve their movie products. Also murders within theaters could go down... and when the couples in the corner start making out, maybe the theater employees would grab some popcorn and get a good show. See? It's not all bad... being watched all the time. Ahem.

Monitor which ads get the best reaction?

[amaiman]

From the article: "Within the cinema industry this tool will feed powerful marketing data that will inform film directors, cinema advertisers and cinemas with useful data about what audiences enjoy and what adverts capture the most attention"

Hint: We don't enjoy the adverts, especially after paying almost $12 for a ticket. Perhaps if the whole audience gives the camera the finger through all of the ads, they will get the message? :-)

Those bastards

[Drakkenmensch]

We'll send to JAIL those criminal masterminds who bring their own chocolate to the theater!!!

Re:Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

[crovira]

"If you stare into the Abyss long enough the Abyss stares back at you." - Friedrich Nietzsche

Re:Uh...what?

[Anonymous Coward]

I had a man pat me down and perform a full cavity search, but theater management called the police and had him escorted out. Does that count?

Wear a Mask!

[Pigamagrundy]

Is it unethical to wear a mask to a horror film?

Re:What are they looking for?

[Oidhche]

They're going to show 2girls1cup and record viewers reactions, then make a new movie from that footage.

Re:even more reason to wait for the dvd

[Himring]

This'll just make me stop going to the movie theater, cuz if I feel like they're watching me pour rum into my diet coke, in order to tolerate their bad movies, then I just ain't goin. And I'm pretty sure the flare from my pipe will be picked up by these cameras too....

Re:Finally!

[Shadis]

...Thank you for watching.. We invite you to stay for out next feature presentation..'Deep Throat'

Re:The bigger problem

[Culture20]

So it's time to start building a bigger wall.

They have one in China. They had a revolution too.

Re:Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

[An ominous Cow art]

I didn't realize they were remaking The Abyss. Still not enough to get me to go back to the theater, though.

Re:That won't be on the evaluation form.

[Anonymous Coward]

Movie-goer Denies Beating Wife, Enjoying Adverts
Confesses to Being "On the Ropes"

One surefire way to end this

[Anonymous Coward]

Have some teenagers go in and "imitate" peewee herman, or send a couple in for a little third base.

News Headline: Theater Owners busted for making child porn.

Re:even more reason to wait for the dvd

[Anonymous Coward]

That was a hoot.

Re:even more reason to wait for the dvd

[BronsCon]

Portable girls are the best. The larger units that just sit there on the couch are nowhere near as convenient as the ones you can bring with you.

Then again, the couchtop units are easier to get away from when you need to.