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Amazon Launches Online Movie Studio
angry tapir writes "Amazon.com is getting into the movie business by opening Amazon Studios, with the goal of using the Internet to put fresh movies on the big screen. The new Internet movie studio will allow writers to upload screenplays to its website where the global Internet audience can read them and offer feedback, or producers/directors can use them to make test movies. The test movies, which must be at least 70 minutes in length, can also be uploaded."
They could make a full-feature cartoon about America and its modern culture, called American Pigs.
Americans could be portrayed as greedy, belligerent, overfed swine driving ridiculously large vehicles and overpopulating the planet one litter at a time. The protagonist could be named Sergeant Swine who is in the Military and has fought 2 tours of duty in Iraq, ready to go back for the third. One of the musical moments could be when Sgt. Swine and his 20 year-old wife decide to have another litter before he leaves, even as their sty is riddled with empty pizza boxes, McDonald's containers, dirty diapers, and smatterings of pig shit. The American pigs would squeal as they are comedically splattered into hams and bacon by roadside bombs, or even slaughtered Jalal - style (oh, the irony!) by the Arab dogs.
The Arabs would be portrayed as being cowardly beligerent dogs whose frequent marches offscreen with studs, bitches and puppies represent the closed, repressed nature of their bigamous and pedophilic sexuality. The Arab dogs would of course be various shades of brown, emaciated, and at their wits' ends; with the Imams and royal families being every bit as overfed as the Americans. Barack Hussein Obama would, of course, be the only American represented by a canine to show that anybody(especially Saudi Arabia or Dubai) can rule the U.S. if enough money is involved. The Jews, for example, could be represented by plump, meddling seagulls who feed from the troughs of American capitalism only to shit on the cars of the Americans who employ them.
That's my fucking idea, none of you steal it.