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Microsoft Lays Claim To Patent On 'Fans'
theodp writes "A USPTO filing made public Thursday reveals that Microsoft is seeking a patent for something it calls 'One-Way Public Relationships' in social networks and other online properties, lawyer-speak for what's more commonly known as being a 'fan' of something online. It's unclear whether it's a goof on Apple, but Microsoft curiously used the example of a U2 fan named Steve to explain its 'invention' to the USPTO. Purported patent reformer Microsoft, which has called for the US to change from a first-to-invent patent system to a first-to-file system, filed the patent application in July 2009. Microsoft is a partner with and investor in Facebook, which first established its fan pages back in November 2007."
I call prior art when I had a crush on this girl who blew me off.
I figured they could afford air conditioners.
Slashdot Lays Waste To Fans of Patents
'We are trying to prove ourselves wrong as quickly as possible, because only in that way can we find progress.' RPF
They appear to be filing patents of prior art with the intention of getting patent law changed to a first-to-file system in the future.
If they succeed in getting the law changed, they then get to sue the inventors of the technology for violating their patents.
making itself globally irrelevant 1 patent at a time
The one phrase that best describes this is "patently obviously".
http://alternatives.rzero.com/
It's unclear whether it's a goof on Apple, but Microsoft curiously used the example of a U2 fan named Steve to explain its 'invention' to the USPTO.
It's too bad there aren't any "Steves" that have some sort of close relationship with Microsoft...
Steve Ballmer and 2 other people like this.
There's no -1 for "I don't get it."
If this patent gets rejected, will Microsoft and the Patent Office find themselves on each other's Freaks list?
This space unintentionally left blank.
I really, really, really, from the bottom of my heart, with a stomach-churning sickness and bile rising in my throat, hate this trend of trivial and obvious technology patents. They all boil down to the same thing: "We saw someone else doing this, and we think it's a good idea, so we want to be the only people that are allowed to do it from now on."
Caveat Utilitor
That's it, I'm going to go unfan Microsoft in Facebook.
I was getting worried they were patenting a rotating device used to blow air to cool things. Essential for modern computers...
(BTW most air conditioners use fans too.
Right here.
I am officially gone from
In other news:
Microsoft files patent for 'One-Way Public Malice' in social networks and other online properties, lawyer-speak for what's more commonly known as 'hating' something online.
"Lame" - Galaxar
As I recall, I was a member of their online Fan Club, and the software for that was copyright.
-- Tigger warning: This post may contain tiggers! --
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rent_seeking
Rent seeking generally implies the extraction of uncompensated value from others without making any contribution to productivity, such as by gaining control of land and other pre-existing natural resources, or by imposing burdensome regulations or other government decisions that may affect consumers or businesses.
http://www.friesian.com/rent.htm
Because rents are the easiest and most secure kind of income, it is natural for people to want income from rents rather than principally from profits or wages, and to want rents that involve the least risk and labor as enterprises. This motive is called "rent-seeking," and there is nothing wrong with it. Indeed, those who collect rents in an economy serve the valuable function of seeking to maintain and preserve capital assets [1]. It becomes wrong when rent-seeking means trying to collect rents off of capital that is not the rightful possession of the rent-seeker. This can be legally accomplished through the means that secure the rights of property in the first place: politics and the law. Through political influence people can be given ownership of things that are not their property, or should not be anyone's property. The theory of rent-seeking began with the economist Gordon Tullock.
"Theft" of intellectual property is in some situations, the proper, sane and moral response to systematised and institutional abuse of the limited monopoly granted to ideas and expressions for the original intent of fostering creativity and innovation. Once "intellectual property" becomes for intents and purposes indistinguishable from real estate, it represents a form of abusive coercion which misplaces rent-seeking behaviour as the objective of granting patent and copyright - not the incidental incentive for works of interest in common.
"Flyin' in just a sweet place,
Never been known to fail..."
How long has Twitter been around? Wouldn't that be one of the most obvious and huge users of this idea?
"Flame away, I wear asbestos underwear"
public static void patentIdea(Idea i) {
// if (!i.ours) return;
i.ours=true;
if (i.hasMoneyMakingPotential)
i.patent();
else
i.patentAnyway();
}
(What's really sad is that I pasted the code in to Eclipse to check for syntax errors.)
I'm starting to get worried. If I feel like making a small application at home for my Android and then wanting to give it out as a Lite or Pay version, that there is a chance part of the program is using some simple logic that is patented by some big corporation like Microsoft. And I'll end up getting asked to pay them for something that pretty much is "d'uh".
This patent trend needs to get stopped before we can't do anything without it cost everyone an arm and a leg for stupid reasons.
My patent for "One-Way False Information Relationships" amounts to "I'm lying to all of you."
Just ask my ex-wives and -girlfriends -- they'll tell you all about my "One-Way False Information Relationships".
-kgj
This is the first thing that came to my mind...
US the drain of your patent system is going to help fuck up your competitiveness.
"'One-Way Public Relationships' in social networks and other online properties, lawyer-speak for what's more commonly known as being a 'fan' "
Microsoft should patent assholes too, layman-speak for what's more commonly known as being a lawyer.
Enough is enough already: abolish the USPTO
Hope is the currency of fools
Your all witnesses. I wish to lay claim to patenting the act of patenting the obvious. While at it I wish to patent the act of posting to Slashdot. Pay up my pretties.
Please mod me 1 or troll. It's where the truth is these days, even on Slashdot. Beware the power of moderators everywh
Rent Is Too Damn High!
All the Andriod, Apple, Linux, etc. fanbois are going to have to start paying MS.
Pure genius Mr. Ballmer, pure genuis!
p.s. If you can't beat em, patent their fanbois.
The real Sig captains the Northwestern. This one captains
Patenting fans? Not cool, Microsoft... not cool.
So in effect, cementing the power for the people with the money.
---- Booth was a patriot ----
So, having fans is merely a theoretical exercise dreamed up by Microsoft's R&D department. Boy won't Microsoft be surprised when they grow up to realize that other people and companies have had fans for ages?
I'm starting my patent application for a one-way relationship where I intensely dislike a particular entity for their ass-hat methods of scooping up obvious, real-world-inspired situations and turning them into something it calls "intellectual property".
Unfortunately, the domain is dead. You can still see its former glory on archive.org though.
The Tea Party is just the GOP with a bag over its head.
My patent cortex just hemorrhaged. I'm dead. Bury me in a Microsoft-shaped box.
Python: 'And then suddenly you have a language which says "we're all stuck with whatever the whiniest coder wants".'
Yeah, I would have to agree Microsoft does have a "One-way Public Relationship" with it's customers (how could I let that one go?).
I do not play in the middle of the road
And I think I need to patent that before all you cheese weasels cheat me out of my due lucre.
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
From what I gather from the /. user page, friends are people who you think you like, and fans are people who think they like you. For example, I currently post on /. using a two-fan system.
Ask me about repetitive DNA
It's as if they were trying to file the most ridiculous patent they could think of just to prove the system's broken, and it got accepted. Because the system's so broken it doesn't even get the joke.
Posted from my Android phone. Oh, I can change this? There, that's better...
take notes lam0rs, patent pending haha!
I think US citizens should have the right to sue assholes that steal our tax dollars by doing stupid crap like this. Of course, I'm claiming the patent on that one.
...If the only way they can get fans is by filing a patent claim!
I'm honest enough to admit I lie to myself.
I don't think I understand the First-To-File patent system (at least I hope I don't.)
Can someone explain how it accomplishes anything besides handing the USPTO over to companies that are big enough to afford lots of filings? Already we have little or no recourse that doesn't involve millions in legal fees.
It sounds like an innovative piece of software could be disassembled and its algorithms patented by someone else, legally, as long as they had the money to win a legal challenge (which they wouldn't even have to spend, as long as the inventor knew it.)
file 'bullshit'. for, that is what they are saying.
basically, if the patent goes first to file, i can patent wheel. or, arithmetic. or, logic. because, i would be the first to file. no no, dont worry whether there would be 'prior art' or anything - i assure you if i can file it, i will find the lawyers to argue for it.
Read radical news here
<nt>
Once Microsoft and Facebook find out that the furries are also known as "furry fans", they'll drop the claim.
And run away, screaming.
[End Of Line]
Time to kill the trolls.
Our patent system is hopelessly fucked up. I am going to patent "submitting hopelessly stupid patents" then sue all these lazy/greedy trolls!
Sig?! Sig?! We don't need no stinking sig!!
Let all the Fan boys come out and astroturf all over this one. They are a patented entity now. But only microsoft can have Fan boys (the patent says so). Linux users can only be enthusiasts. Mac users are yuppies. Bring it on you patented entities.
You misunderstand "first-to-file", then. The term is only applicable to using other patent applications to reject claims based on the filing dates of those applications, under 35 USC 102(e), and for interference purposes under 35 USC 102(g). Regular published prior art would still work the same way it does now.
Douchbag band U2.
I thought they'd only be fans of themselves.
I can see how having people like you could seem new and novel to Microsoft.
-- Braden's law of data: All data spends some of its lifetime in an excel spreadsheet.
'One-Way Public Relationships' in social networks and other online properties, lawyer-speak for what's more commonly known as being a 'fan' of something online.
This is also lawyer-speak for what is more technically known as a directed graph.
I thought the patent system was broken for allowing any half-wit to staple "... on the Internet!" onto an existing idea and be granted a patent. Now they're giving patents for "A directed graph... with humans!" The user interface, storage, and processing of directed graphs are a significant part of computer science history, and trace their heritage to before the Unix epoch. There is no technical invention here, nor by Facebook in 2007. You should as easily be allowed to patent "1 + 1 = 2... with humans!" and go sue anyone who is married for infringement.
Stop-Prism.org: Opt Out of Surveillance
This is just grosse... what a new low.
My submittal is already in the works.
yes, so i invent something in my basement, my local hometown knows about it, but some schmock in some other state files it, and he has the thing is it .
how so very logical and rational.
Read radical news here
Will they then sue Twitter for patent infringement?? "first to file" wtf
Isn't Steve Ballmer a fan of U2 as well?
You misunderstand "first-to-file", then.
No, actually you misunderstood my post, as it was intended to be funny...Much as it pains me to admit it, however, it clearly didn't succede in that regard as I've now had to explain it to you. :(
Don't worry though, next time I'll make sure to use the humor tag when posting to prevent confusion!
I'm honest enough to admit I lie to myself.
LiveJournal has always permitted one-way "friend" relationships, helpfully distinguishing the "mutual friends" for you. This patent is just silly.
A "first to file" system wouldn't be completely disastrous provided that evidence of prior art was still enough to scuttle the patent.
Check out the Apostrophe open-source CMS: http://www.apostrophenow.com/
LOL, a blogger at Tactical IP quipped that "One-Way Public Relationship" sounds like a patent for "Total Stalker Dude." Seriously, though, this patent application seems to be going a bit too far.