Software Firm Looking To Hire Naked Coders

Nude House, a Buckinghamshire computer software and naturist company, is looking for coders who aren't afraid to let a few Cheetos fall where no Cheetos have fallen before. The company would like to become the first all nude tech business. From the article: "Company spokesman Chris Taylor told The Register: 'As far as I am aware this is not only the first UK office job for naturists in web-coding or web-selling, but is also the first worldwide facility for naturists to earn substantial sums of money from work that incidentally provides them with the capability to work entirely without clothes.'"

Comments

Really?!?!

[jcwayne]

first worldwide facility for naturists to earn substantial sums of money from work that incidentally provides them with the capability to work entirely without clothes

Um... I can think of a few others. Just sayin'.

Re:Really?!?!

[PopeRatzo]

I have always loved the term "naturists" for people who like to be naked.

You've got to give them credit for insisting on nudity even in the face of everyone else hoping they stay completely covered.

One thing, at least "conceal/carry" isn't an issue for these people. You don't have to be worried about a naked man pulling a gun on you.

I think.

Re:Really?!?!

[JWSmythe]

    The terms you're groping for are whore, prostitute, call-girl, escort, and courtesan. Each level up level are generally more attractive, more discrete, and cost more. If you're looking to spend $5, you're at the whore level (i.e., $5 crack whore). Around $100 (depending on your menu selection) you'd be on the prostitute level. When you get up to escort, prepare to spend hundreds per hour. And if you're even considering the courtesan level, you'd better have references (other clients, and/or courtesans), and money to burn. Depending on the courtesan, you could spend thousands per hour (if they even do the hourly thing) to tens of thousands for just a weekend.

    Inverse to the payment level is the number of clients they service. A "high class escort" may only have a dozen or so customers that they service per year, as they usually demand (and receive) repeat business. A courtesan may have a much smaller client base, but they find themselves well off, and frequently travel a lot with their customers. At that level, their customers frequently have them travel on business trips with them, to make the "right" impression that not only is the business man successful, but he has a beautiful girlfriend with him, despite the fact that when the trip is over, he may not see her again until the next time he needs to make the same appearance.

    And yes, you're right. There are plenty of levels of coders. We're all whores. We render a service for the client who's willing to pay the right price. Remember that next time you get your paycheck, and when your "boss" tells you that he needs something you really don't want to do. But I sir, am an IT courtesan. I'm paid very well, and my client base is very small and select.

Re:Really?!?!

[SilentStaid]

I'd believe you if only because I'm afraid to Google it...

Well played.

Re:Really?!?!

[mcvos]

It's a kind of math that can keep secrets.

Re:Really?!?!

[AmiMoJo]

The problem with everyone being naked is that our bodies shed a lot of icky stuff all the time that is normally contained in our clothes. Smell the crotch of your pants next time you take them off. Do you want your office chairs to smell like that? I think most men would admit that they sometimes leak a bit after going to the loo.

Naturalists often put down a small towel to sit on for that reason. It doesn't make sense to me, why not just put some boxers on and get a bit of support and comfort if you need to carry a (probably rather icky) towel around with you? I suppose it must be a philosophical consideration rather than a practical one.

Re:Really?!?!

[tboulan]

I respectfully decline your offer to smell the crotch of my pants.

Re:Really?!?!

[ArsenneLupin]

You don't have to be worried about a naked man pulling a gun on you.

I know about a man who could pull this stunt. I won't post a link though, indeed whenever I post that link, I get modded down...

Re:Really?!?!

[PopeRatzo]

Smell the crotch of your pants next time you take them off.

My eight-year old Shepherd-mix loves that smell. If you come to my house, you can expect her to drink deeply of that divine bouquet.

Publicity

[Dan East]

Some companies will do anything to get a little publicity. Oh look, it worked.

This is new?

[pushing-robot]

I thought telecommuting had been around for some time.

Re:This is new?

[martin-boundary]

Yeah, except in this case company meetings must use Chatroulette instead of Skype.

Eww

[atomicbutterfly]

A goddamn sausage fest is not a pretty site. Plus given the typical programmer's appearance... oh God help me!

Imagine how the one and only female programmer would feel.

Re:Eww

[Antisyzygy]

I am firmly against the naturist de-sexualization. Many women are too hot for this to be allowed. It would be like making your favorite ice cream taste like dog shit just because you think its wrong to like good ice cream. Im for the sexualization of the human body, and the removal of idiotic moral hang ups about it.

Re:Eww

[SquirrelDeth]

Guess Red Bull would be safer than a steaming cup of coffee.

Re:Eww

[nthwaver]

Just to go out on a limb and take this conversation at all seriously, consider at least that many people have medical requirements for clothing, prescription footwear, etc. And follow along those lines, it's a disability/accessibility issue.

Re:Eww

[93 Escort Wagon]

Seriously though, part of the point of naturism is to demystify the human body and de-sexualize nudity.

Given that the guy specifically wants to hire female coders, I have my doubts about his motivations in this case.

Oh, the Cheetos have fallen there...

[BigDXLT]

I work from home you insensitive clods!

Just a no on this one please.

[Bork]

A job like this is just plan nuts.

Re:Just a no on this one please.

[AGMW]

Like most jobs, the first few days will be the hardest ...

Re:Conference room chairs?

[Greyfox]

That would probably dis-incentivize conferences, making the company even more productive! Freed from the mind-numbing tax of conferences, the company would become an economic powerhouses. Other companies, wanting to copy their success and not realizing that it could be achieved just by eliminating hours of needless daily conferences, would institute the same nude-only policy. Soon, you would not be able to work in IT if you like to wear pants. Oh.. My.. God... This must be stopped!

Re:My Job

[mcvos]

Regardless of what they say, naturalists don't do what they do so they can look at other naked people.

They do what they do so other people will look at them.

Anything else they claim is simply a lie, denial, or an attempt to distract you from the truth.

Naturalists do what they do because they want to look at naked animals and learn from it. Anyone claiming anything else is confusing them with naturists.

Naturists do what they do because they don't want to wear clothes, or because they think social hangups about covering up specific body parts are silly.

People who want other people to look at their naked bodies are called exhibitionists. People who want to look at other naked people are voyeurs. Both might pretend to be naturists, but it's not what naturism is about.