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Man Tries to Patent His "Godly Powers"
KWInt1601 writes "A man who believes he is Christ files a patent application — and the formal dance of responding to office actions from the USPTO begins. Invoking the 1998 State Street decision, the applicant argues, 'like software, godly powers is a method, and affects a machine. Like business methods, godly powers produces a useful, concrete, and tangible result, and that should be all that's needed for statutory material.'"
It would be freaking hilarious if they granted it, and he went around suing all the Churches...
Please, please, please...
Sorry, but we have prior art. See also Respawn.
Also, your system has a respawn lag time of about 3 days. Not very efficient. Especially for someone who claims his boss/dad created an entire universe in less than a week.
I wonder how he'll deal with all the prior art... I mean, we're talking tens of thousands of years here.
If he says that he is Christ, then he's clearly publicly disclosed his "invention" 2000 years ago. The one year statutory bar prevents him from receiving a patent on this. Thus, the powers of Christ is in the public domain.
My postings are informational and does not constitute legal advice. Act on it at your risk.
No sillier than all the recent gesture / software patent applications :)
when working models are no longer required. This and patent trolls.
It's clearly a cunning move to discourage competing second comings of other Jesuses Christs.
What's next some guy tries to patent his sexual technique so he can troll porn companies by sueing them when they use it?
I permit the sun to rise every morning but you don't see me trying to patent it, jerk.
I don't know the meaning of the word 'don't' - J
The whole point of a patent is disclosure in exchange for a monopoly of limited term. Since it has been repeatedly emphasized that God works in mysterious ways to which mortals are not privy, clearly the apparatus and method in question have not been adequately disclosed to the copyright office.
Arguably, since God has retained these powers as a closely held Mystery, licenced only on a limited basis to his fertilitity and translation services provider subsidiary, Holy Spirit LLC, and a number of middle-eastern contractors to which he has outsourced prophetic work over the years, Godly power would be better served by Trade Secret, rather than Patent, protection...
I think the letter he wrote in reply to the non-final rejection was the most representative of this person's delusion. I reuploaded it at scribd for easy access: http://www.scribd.com/doc/57372518/USPTO-05-27-2008-Miscellaneous-Incoming-Letter
As I read it, all I could think of is if you're god why do you need the patent office to enforce the sue of your abilities?
"How do you know you're God?" - "Because when I pray I find I'm talking to myself."
Care killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.
As part of the patent application, doesn't he need to disclose how others can acquire godly powers?
William of Ockham had no beard. The most likely explanation is that it was chewed off by squirrels every morning.
I'm all for it! Basically, he's arguing that if software patents are valid, then his patents must also be valid. It probably won't be granted (but who knows these days?), but anything that highlights exactly how idiotic software patents really are. Think of his as the Flying Spaghetti Monster of Bilski. Go, crazy dude! Rock on, useful idiot!
Dewey, what part of this looks like authorities should be involved?
I strongly doubt he does this :-)
"My opinions are my own, and I've got *lots* of them!"
As much as I'd love to throw down with you on this, I am reminded about the passage of casting stumbling stones into someone else's path. I don't want to do that to you, because no good would come of it. So let's just conclude this. I respect your belief, and your strength of conviction in coming onto /. with your beliefs. You believe in biblical inerrancy, while I do not (I believe in biblical ineffability, which is a far stranger beast). I wish you well.
Here's to hot beer, cold women, and Glaswegian kisses for all.