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Academics Not Productive Enough? Sack 'em

Posted by timothy on from the wish-I-could-sack-'em-for-being-poor-teachers dept.

ananyo writes "One hundred academics at the University of Sydney, Australia, have this week been told they will lose their jobs for not publishing frequently enough. The move is part of a wider cost-cutting plans designed to pay for new buildings and refurbishment to the university. Letters were posted to researchers on Monday 20 February, informing them their positions were being terminated because they hadn't published at least four 'research outputs' over the past three years. It is unclear which research fields the academics work in. Another 64 academics were told they had a choice between leaving and moving to a teaching-only position, he said."

8 of 356 comments (clear)

  1. In academia, we don't say. . . by MagusSlurpy · · Score: 5, Funny

    . . ."publish or perish" just because we appreciate alliteration.

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    My sister opened a computer store in Hawaii. She sells C shells by the seashore.
    1. Re:In academia, we don't say. . . by TheRaven64 · · Score: 4, Funny

      And for people outside academia, here's the obligatory SMBC...

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      I am TheRaven on Soylent News
  2. Game show? by owenferguson · · Score: 5, Funny

    Surely they could make this into some sort of a reality TV gameshow. "So you think you can publish!" People from the general public could read the various works, and vote by phone for who gets kicked out...

  3. Re:That'll work well. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'd recommend a study on it. Seriously, right now unless you want to lose your job.

  4. Re:Good riddance by mwvdlee · · Score: 5, Funny

    There are far too many in "accedemia" [...] How about schools focus on TEACHING

    Based on the evidence presented before me, I feel inclined to agree.

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  5. I've got tenure, suckers! by in10se · · Score: 3, Funny

    One of my favorite Futurama scenes:

    Mayor Poopenmayer: Professor Wernstrom, can you save my city?
    Professor Wernstrom: Of course, but it'll cost you. First, I'll need tenure.
    Mayor Poopenmayer: Done.
    Professor Wernstrom: And a big research grant.
    Mayor Poopenmayer: You got it.
    Professor Wernstrom: Also, access to a lab, and five graduate students, at least three of them Chinese.
    Mayor Poopenmayer: All right, done. What's your plan?
    Professor Wernstrom: What plan? I'm set for life. Au revoir, suckers!
    Leela: That rat! Do something!
    Mayor Poopenmayer: I wish I could, but he's got tenure.

    --
    Popisms.com - Connecting pop culture
  6. Re:That'll work well. by Tim+C · · Score: 4, Funny

    Good lord, are you mad!? Don't waste time studying it, get publishing papers now!!

    --
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  7. Re:That'll work well. by gnapster · · Score: 5, Funny

    The sum of the powers of *Whoosh* is not equal to the power of the hypotenuse of *Whoosh* for any integral power greater than two.

    I have an elegant proof for this conjecture, but I can't type it here on slashdot because it requires Unicode.