Slashdot Mirror


Apple Has Too Much Money

Hugh Pickens writes "AP reports that last week during a question-and-answer session at the company's annual shareholders' meeting CEO Tim Cook said he believes Apple has more money than it needs and his next challenge is to figure out whether Apple should break from the cash-hoarding ways of his predecessor, the late Steve Jobs, and dip into its $98 billion bank account to pay shareholders a dividend this year. 'Frankly speaking, it's more than we need to run the company.' The question of how to handle Apple's cash stockpile is a touchy one, partly because company co-founder Jobs had steadfastly brushed aside suggestions that the company restore its quarterly dividend which Jobs suspended in 1995 when it was in such deep trouble that it needed to hold on to every cent to keep from going bankrupt. Marketwatch analyst Mark Hulbert writes that a compelling case can be made that a huge cash hoard actually represents grave danger for Apple. That's because too much cash often burns a hole in managers' pockets, and they end up doing a poor job of investing that cash—engaging instead in foolish pursuits like empire building. Hulbert adds that a good strategy for ensuring that Apple remains a hungry, growth-oriented entrepreneurial company might be for it to distribute much of its cash to shareholders."

35 of 570 comments (clear)

  1. I sold my Apple stock in 2005 by Average_Joe_Sixpack · · Score: 5, Funny

    I thought I was a genius for doubling my money.

    1. Re:I sold my Apple stock in 2005 by Alrescha · · Score: 5, Funny

      "I thought I was a genius for doubling my money."

      Sigh. Me too. Instead I have a PowerMac that effectively cost me a quarter of a million dollars.

      A.

      --
      ...bringing you cynical quips since 1998
    2. Re:I sold my Apple stock in 2005 by Oswald · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Like I said to my sister in 1999, there's no way not to hate yourself if you invest in stocks. What are your options?

      Buy a stock and it goes down, apparently forever. What a dope I am.
      Buy a stock and it goes up. Sell, and it goes up further. Damn, I knew I got out too early.
      Buy a stock and it goes up then back down. Shit! I got greedy and lost money.
      Buy a stock and it goes up, you sell, then it goes down. I knew I had that stock figured out! Why the hell did I only buy 200 shares?

      So sure, you can make money, or you can lose money, but there's really no way to be happy with the outcome. ;)

      (Haters please note that this is intended as humor. I'm sure that, aside from the universally felt twinge at having left money on the table, parent poster is perfectly happy to have "only" doubled his/her money.

    3. Re:I sold my Apple stock in 2005 by Lumpy · · Score: 5, Funny

      You bought ram from Apple when you ordered your mac too?

      --
      Do not look at laser with remaining good eye.
  2. Fund some partially Apple owned startups . . . by PolygamousRanchKid+ · · Score: 4, Insightful

    . . . pick some good staff and management to run them, let them come up with some good ideas. And just wait and see where they go. If nowhere, tough luck, but the mother ship's kids won't go hungry. On the other hand . . . maybe they might end up with a valuable subsidiary.

    Giving cash to shareholders won't work. They will just use the cash to go out and buy yet again more Apple products.

    So then Apple will be stuck with the money again, and not know what to do with it.

    --
    Schroedinger's Brexit: The UK is both in and out of the EU at the same time!
  3. 1995? by mfnickster · · Score: 4, Insightful

    How did jobs manage to suspend Apple's dividend in 1995 when he was still working at NeXT??

    --
    "Slow down, Cowboy! It has been 3 years, 7 months and 26 days since you last successfully posted a comment."
    1. Re:1995? by rgbrenner · · Score: 5, Informative

      That's because Jobs didn't suspended the dividend. It was ended by Gil Amelio:
      http://news.google.com/newspapers?nid=1755&dat=19960214&id=sRYcAAAAIBAJ&sjid=6HwEAAAAIBAJ&pg=3973,6289068

  4. Re:Or they could.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Insightful

    just pay more to the people who produce their wares? Ya know, give back to the suckers that made them rich in the first place?

    There, fixed that for you,.

  5. Re:Some ideas by Junta · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Well, multiple problems.

    One, why in the hell would you want Apple to sink Google, AMD, Intel, or Microsoft? From a user perspective killing any is bad. Alternatively, why the hell would Apple care to sink AMD or Intel, neither of which compete with Apple? If your claim is to stop other computer vendors from using the same instruction set as OSX systems, Apple has a pretty tight grip on OSX without instruction set lock-in (yes there are hackintoshes, but exceptionally rare in the scheme of things.

    Second, that would be a fast way to draw attention for anti-competitive moves. Both from a regulator standpoint and quickly making enemies of a lot of companies with a lot of resources. They have a pretty comfortable competitive landscape right now, and a drastic move represents some huge unknowns that could be pretty devastating.

    Finally, they frankly can't afford to buy most of those companies. Market cap is generally a good relative indicator of theoretical buy-out requirements:
    Google: 200 billion
    Intel: 134 billion
    Microsoft: 265 billion
    I don't know what percentage of shares is realistically available or how sky-high the price would be driven if Apple attempted a hostile takeover, but even baseline the market cap is beyond their reach. If they do have 98 billion cash on hand, then AMD is the only one they'd likely be able to subsume, but with a huge question of 'why would they?'.

    --
    XML is like violence. If it doesn't solve the problem, use more.
  6. Um, what? by whisper_jeff · · Score: 5, Insightful

    I couldn't read the linked article (I seriously need to log in to view an AP news article hosted by Google? That's rich!) but that's not at all what I have heard Cook discussed. He downplayed the likelihood of a dividend payout and made it sound much more likely that Apple would find other ways to invest the money. In fact, his quote (re dividend payouts) was "My message there is that the board and the management are thinking about this very deeply... and we will do what we think is in the best interest of shareholders." Call me crazy but that sounds an awful lot like "look, we're not going to outright say it, but we're NOT paying dividends. We're thinking of other ways to invest the money that are better for the company which is, in our opinion, better for the shareholders."

    Look, I know investors _REALLY_ want a dividend payout because it amounts to free cash (and lately the trend is "Apple, you have tons of cash - GIVE ME SOME!!") but, face facts people, the company has a history of not paying dividends, they don't feel it's a good use of their money, and they feel there are better ways to invest the money. Just accept it and move on.

    Want to get dividends? Invest in stocks that pay dividends.

  7. Re:Poor timing by UnknowingFool · · Score: 4, Informative

    Perhaps they wouldn't have the "problem" of having such a colossal cash mountain if all workers in the supply chain were paid a fair wage?

    Do you know what is a fair wage in China is? Most people only look at the wage in US dollars and immediately claim to be unfair without ever looking at what people are paid relatively in China. The wages at Foxconn plants are slightly better than average for factory workers in China. Apple pays those that work on their products more than competitors do at Foxconn.

    --
    Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in it.
  8. Re:Another fly on the wall heard from by Hadlock · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Didn't Tim Cook take over day to day operations of Apple in 2006? Steve Jobs was always the official CEO, but Steve had been grooming Tim Cook for almost half a decade when he finally stepped down. Most of the decisions made in the last six years have been, in part, made by Tim Cook.
     
    I don't think you really know what you're talking about when you say things like "So far, Tim Cook hasn't really done anything significant one way or another and has been kind of 'coasting' on the companies success." when in actuality he has been running the company for 4+ years.

    --
    moox. for a new generation.
  9. how much could i pay you to justify by decora · · Score: 4, Insightful

    making you work 80 hours a week, making you live in a tiny room with 20 other people, make you use dangerous chemicals that damage your brain, threaten you with prison for even talking about a union, etc?

    1. Re:how much could i pay you to justify by gnasher719 · · Score: 4, Informative

      making you work 80 hours a week, making you live in a tiny room with 20 other people, make you use dangerous chemicals that damage your brain, threaten you with prison for even talking about a union, etc?

      1. I'd like to see evidence of working 80 hours at week. Plus Foxconn actually pays overtime for every additional hour worked; many companies in the USA don't pay anything for overtime.

      2. Foxconn doesn't make anyone live in a tiny room with 20 other people. They offer accomodation in dormitories with 8 people per room, at a cost of less than 10 hours salary per month. Perfect for someone who wants to work for 3, 6 or 12 months, save as much money as possible, and return to their home village with a big pile of cash. These people are free to find other accomodation, which will cost them more.

      3. There are no dangerous chemicals in use anywhere in the USA. Not anywhere. Never. Ever. Do you believe that? Shit happens, and responsible companies like Apple act when shit happens.

      4. Chinese employees are free to join a union. The company even has to pay for the majority of union fees. Now it is true that you can't start a union other than the state union, but you _can_ join a union.

    2. Re:how much could i pay you to justify by UnknowingFool · · Score: 5, Interesting

      In regards to #2, some of these factories are in the middle of nowhere because the land was cheap. If the companies didn't build dormitories, their workers would have had no housing as the factories were built so quickly that the local area has not been able to keep up with residential construction. This is the same reason some of the factories are mini-cities. There really isn't any place for the worker to eat or shop. Cars are not the norm in China so most workers can't just get in their car and drive to the nearest town for supplies and housing. Now if you don't build these amenities, your competition is ready to do so and get workers and the contracts you wanted.

      --
      Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in it.
  10. Re:Poor timing by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Informative

    to keep already highly valued share prices inflated.

    By P/E ratio Apple is valued less than Google, Amazon, Verizon, ATT, Oracle, LinkedIn, NetFlix. It is one of the CHEAPEST tech stocks in the markets it competes in (devices, media, mobile), even though it continues to see phenomenal growth.

  11. Re:The stockholders can't afford a dividend by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Informative

    Sounds like more right-wing clap-trap about the underprivileged and under-appriciated 1%. Your going to have to do better than generalities to claim that 80% of the value of a dividend would be eaten in taxes. First my understanding is that Apple only pays the difference in corporate taxes from what it pays overseas and what the US tax if all the money had been made here. So that takes a good chunk out of your 30%. Secondly long-term cap gains is 15% but that shouldn't be added on to the cost of the dividend to the shareholder, since the shareholder gets that on any dividend. I never heard of this 35% tax (80 - 30 - 15 = 35) of which you refer to for simply issuing a dividend.

    I would be leery too if I were them of issuing dividends, but not for tax reasons. The principle appears to have served them well. They are probably working on some sort of optimal ratio of cash to operational costs (or some other relevant factor) to aim for and then figure out a dividend that can glide to that ratio so they don't feel the need to yank it back later when the competition starts to tighten up again.

    Dividend payments thought would also engender some good will towards them. Just like when Microsoft started paying dividends the effect was seen in personal income on a national levels, an Apple dividend would help spur the US economy.

  12. Re:Some ideas by TheRaven64 · · Score: 5, Insightful

    The problem is, this kind of acquisition often doesn't make sense. For example, one proposal was that Apple would buy ARM. They could afford to without making a significant dent in their cash reserves, even if they paid double the current market cap. But would Samsung want to license CPU designs from Apple? Almost certainly not - they'd just drive the other mobile device makers to designs licensed from MIPS or even Intel. The net result would be that Apple would end up paying a much larger share of the R&D costs. This was one of the main reasons why they switched to Intel chips in Macs: they were IBM's only laptop / desktop CPU customer and so were paying for all of the R&D, while they only pay something like 5-10% of Intel's R&D costs. Buying other companies on their supply chain would have the same problems.

    If I were in their position, I would do the same thing a number of other successful tech companies have done and set up an in-house VC program. If an employee has a cool idea that is not a market that Apple currently wants to be in, then Apple should front them the cash to set up their own company, own 50% of the shares, and let the employee go on sabbatical and return if the company fails.

    --
    I am TheRaven on Soylent News
  13. Re:Poor timing by rgbrenner · · Score: 4, Insightful

    They are paid so terribly, that thousands of Chinese line up and wait for hours for a chance to work at Foxconn. And the job ad even says the starting wage is $261:
    http://micgadget.com/21420/thousands-line-up-for-foxconns-jobs-in-zhengzhou/

  14. the labor market in china is not a free market by decora · · Score: 5, Insightful

    i dont understand why people who believe in the free market keep looking to China as some kind of model on a hill. China is run by the Communist Party, and the corporations over there are part owned by the same party.

    There are no labor unions, there are no workers rights laws, there are no environmental laws. There are mines and factories that are run on prison labor - 'criminals' being people who speak things the government doesnt like. Criminals being people who mention forming a union. That is not a 'free market' upon which wages were decided. That is a captive market, not a free competitive market.

    In case you have forgotten, slavery was what the Republican Party was founded to eliminate from the face of the Earth. Not to make a profit off of it by claiming it was 'fair'.

    The idea that someone should not have to inhale N-Hexane on an assembly line to save 1% on the cost of a product has nothing to do with 'socialism'. It is about basic human decency, basic morality, basic common sense. It is about the difference between a civilized society and lawless barbarism.

  15. Re:Give half the money to the 3 big stakeholders by OnlineAlias · · Score: 5, Insightful

    I'm glad you aren't running my company. None of these things have any basis in reality for even the most green in managerial finance. Having excess capital, while generally a good problem to have, is still a big problem. Companies can bleed it through stock buybacks, dividends, or by investing it, but they cannot give it away. What Apple needs to think about doing is buying or creating other companies, be it by horizontal or vertical integration. For example, they could buy or build a competitor to Foxconn (or buy Foxconn itself, this is one I would seriously look at). Or they could take a controlling interest in Facebook. Or invest in the million other smaller start ups that could bring new innovations to Apple. Apple is seriously at a crossroads right now. Without an innovative product pipeline (or Jobs) and a supply chain that is costing a ton in PR, Apple is going to have to start putting their big boy panties on and start acting like a big boy company.

  16. Re:Dividends? Ridiculous. by swalve · · Score: 5, Insightful

    No, because you get to keep the dividend and use it to buy more stock if you prefer.

  17. The value of a stock by LeoXIII · · Score: 5, Insightful

    The fundamental value of a stock is the sum of future payouts in the form of dividends, spinoffs or liquidation. For companies with finite resources, such as a mining company, this is easier to compute than for a technology company like Apple. But if Apple would never pay a dividend or spin off parts, the value of the stock is zero. The discussion above shows a remarkable lack of understanding of the basics of capitalism. The only reason not to pay a dividend is that the money is better invested in the company now so that it will generate even higher profits for the owners in the future.

  18. Re:Dividends? Ridiculous. by samkass · · Score: 4, Insightful

    When you buy stock you own part of the company. Isn't it kind of silly to not take any of the profit out of the company you own once it's mature and has all the money it needs for operations into the indefinite future. Intentionally deciding not to get paid as the owner of a company seems silly.

    --
    E pluribus unum
  19. Greater fool by gr8_phk · · Score: 5, Insightful

    The problem is you're playing the greater fool game. If you intend to make money by selling a stock at a later date, then what you're saying is that you think you can find someone willing to buy AFTER you got the value out of it. Your buying strategy is also then based on inside information, "intuition" or some other divine insight, otherwise people would have already known and driven the price up. Another downside is that you have to actually SELL your assets to get any money from them.

    The old school way which is now gaining popularity again is to buy companies that pay dividends. This gives you a return without finding a fool to sell to or cashing out. It's how it's supposed to work. If the stock goes down, it's not even relevant unless they cut the dividend (there is eventually a correlation there). Now a few words about yield. A company can only pay (long term, at most) a dividend of 1/PE where PE is the price/earnings ratio. So a PE of 20 means they can potentially pay a 5% dividend if they pay out all the earnings. A PE of 10 is potentially "undervalued" in this regard. Apple with a PE around 15 isn't actually bad, they should probably just start paying a dividend based on earnings and keep the pile of cash for a rainy day. Then the dividend could be kept up during tough times.

    1. Re:Greater fool by fafaforza · · Score: 4, Insightful

      But you don't have to find a "fool" because market makers are always there to facilitate liquidity. And if there's a good amount of volume, you won't have trouble selling at the price you want.

    2. Re:Greater fool by Anthony+Mouse · · Score: 5, Interesting

      The problem is you're playing the greater fool game. If you intend to make money by selling a stock at a later date, then what you're saying is that you think you can find someone willing to buy AFTER you got the value out of it. Your buying strategy is also then based on inside information, "intuition" or some other divine insight, otherwise people would have already known and driven the price up. Another downside is that you have to actually SELL your assets to get any money from them.

      That's not how it works. The stock price of a company has at least some relationship to the value of the company -- certainly it will almost never fall substantially below the liquidation value, because if it ever falls below it, there are plenty of vultures who will swoop in and buy it for just under that amount and then liquidate the assets at a profit.

      So if you buy a stock for $100 and it goes up to $120, that is usually because the company is now worth more money. They might have more money in the bank, or their products might be more popular in the market and the expected future profits are higher, etc. The person who buys it is not (necessarily) a sucker -- they're buying something ostensibly worth $120 for $120.

      What you're probably referring to is the efficient market hypothesis, which basically says that the risk-adjusted return for any stock is the same, because if it wasn't then market participants would sell stocks with lower risk-adjusted returns (thus lowering their price) and buy stocks with higher ones (thus raising their price), until the risk-adjusted return for both stocks is the same. (The ironic thing about the efficient market hypothesis is that it only works if market participants assume it isn't true -- because if people assume it's true it encourages people to be lazy in evaluating bargains and then it ceases to be true; but since they generally don't assume it's true, it tends to be true. Another way of saying this is "people who trade stocks on the basis of the efficient market hypothesis are suckers.")

      But that doesn't have anything to do with whether someone who buys at a higher price is getting a better or worse deal. Stocks with higher volatility (like a lot of tech stocks, because fortunes change overnight in this industry) tend to have higher returns when they're doing well, because the probability is higher that you'll see losses than you will if you buy e.g. Walmart. In other words, the returns can be higher with Apple because the risk is higher which makes the risk-adjusted expected returns the same for both Apple and Walmart (and, if you buy the efficient market hypothesis, all other securities). There is no reason to expect that you'll do better buying Apple vs. Walmart, regardless of their past performance or anything of that nature ("past performance is no guarantee of future results"), because if there was any reason to expect that then the respective prices of those stocks would almost immediately change to reflect it and it would case to be the case.

      The point being that if you buy a stock and then later sell it for a higher price, neither you nor the buyer are necessarily suckers. You just have different valuations of the value of the stock -- and the difference may be very small. If you think it isn't worth more than $100 and someone else thinks it's worth $100.20, you aren't having some great existential disagreement about the future of the company. You're disagreeing about whether the future risk-adjusted returns will be two tenths of a percent higher or lower and comparing that favorably or disfavorably with the risk-adjusted returns for other investments (which will be in the same range).

      The old school way which is now gaining popularity again is to buy companies that pay dividends. This gives you a return without finding a fool to sell to or cashing out. It's how it's supposed to work. If the stock goes down, it's not even relevant unless they cut the dividend (there is eventually a c

  20. Re:Another fly on the wall heard from by Junta · · Score: 4, Interesting

    There are two aspects, reality and perception.

    For reality, it's hard to say. Through the end of 2010, all choices had to go through Jobs. Even if you can fairly say Cook 'made the decision', Jobs had final say and might have even vetoed some moves we never heard of. It seems unlikely that Cook was operating fully indpendently.

    In terms of perception, Jobs was undeniably CEO until 2011 and his name was attached to all of the right decisions, whether earned or not. Without Jobs, the shareholders may be putting quite a different set of pressures on Cook. Even absent of that, I would expect Cook not making decisions conscious of how Jobs would think of them, rather as official CEO or as chairman of the board. It might be a full year before the body of shareholders and management really start showing how they will be different or not in a post-Jobs world.

    --
    XML is like violence. If it doesn't solve the problem, use more.
  21. Re:Buy low sell high. by dkf · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Remember, buy low, sell high. You may have to wait for the high and resist selling in a panic.

    Yes, but markets can be irrational for much longer than you have the money to keep up.

    --
    "Little does he know, but there is no 'I' in 'Idiot'!"
  22. Reducing cash reserves now would be damaging. by lwsimon · · Score: 4, Insightful

    They should not, under any circumstance, reduce cash reserves at this point. Re-establishing a dividend might make sense, but not an excessive one, and not as a means of managing capital.

    Do you know why it took a year for competitors to bring out a real iPad competitor? It wasn't because Apple had much better tech, or because the others didn't have the prototypes - it was because no one could order parts. Before Apple launched the iPad, they bought up so much of the manufacturing capacity for key components - screens, especially - there was no way that Samsung could contract enough suppliers to bring a competitor to market.

    Doing this takes a lot of capital. If they're talking about reducing operating capital, that tells me they don't have a "Next Big Thing" that they're planning on launching like they did the iPhone and iPad. That means drastically lower long-term growth.

    --
    Learn about Photography Basics.
  23. Re:Another fly on the wall heard from by fuzzyfuzzyfungus · · Score: 4, Insightful

    And ignoring sensible dividends and going hell for leather for growth is what did for the likes of Enron.

    The 'fraud on a massive scale' thing probably had something to do with that one...

  24. Stifle innovation by StripedCow · · Score: 4, Funny

    I hope they use that money to further stifle innovation. All these technological novelties and the accompanying technobabble are growing over my head.

    --
    If Pandora's box is destined to be opened, *I* want to be the one to open it.
  25. Re:Buy low sell high. by VortexCortex · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Missing option.

    Another missing option: Don't gamble, or try to make money from literally nothing. -- What, pray tell, social benefit does moving numbers around actually do? You shift them around smartly and the numbers get bigger? Oh I see...

    It gives companies something to borrow against when people think highly of them at the cost of having the rug ripped out from under them (and their shareholders) at any given moment by mere rumors... Companies that don't borrow against their stock price can survive even terrible market conditions by PROVIDING BENEFIT to their customers alone.

    Don't get me wrong, I understand investments. It's just that the stock market isn't the only way to invest. When I invest in something, it's because I actually believe in the company based on something more than just erratic market trends. The value of my investment doesn't fluctuate with the moronic whims of a fickle market -- My returns actually reflect the company's profits. If they don't seem to be performing well, then that's my fault for not doing my research, or just bad luck. "Shit Happens."(tm)

    Now if I can sell my failing investment to someone else, then I've just made some poor fool a sucker. The stock market is full to the brim with suckers... I may have dodged that bullet, but I actually don't do this unless absolutely necessary -- Instead I try to see if there's some way to fix the issue instead of bailing out at the first sign of trouble (unlike a stock marketeer). I sleep better at night, and make better investments, because I have a vested interest in actual, not momentary, success and don't play in the stock cesspool.

  26. Re:Another fly on the wall heard from by drb_chimaera · · Score: 5, Informative

    Think you'll find that was 1997 not 2007 he returned to Apple...

  27. Re:Apple's management doesn't know either. by thesandtiger · · Score: 4, Interesting

    "If Apple's management were such geniuses, then why don't they take that cash and start another business line that will make them even more successful?"

    By and large that's actually what Apple has been doing. To wit:

    - They were a computer/software maker and started making money doing that thanks to the iMac. So, they:
    - Started up the iPod business selling music players that were pretty easy to use and fill up. So they:
    - Started up the iPhone business, selling phones that were pretty neat along with apps that can be used to fill 'em up. So they:
    - Started up the iPad business, selling tablets that were pretty neat compared to anything out at the time, along with even more apps that can be used to fill 'em up.

    The problem for them is figuring out what the next "So they" should be. In my opinion, unless they have some really amazing stuff hidden (like AR glasses or something similar), I don't see them having an easy time bringing out yet another class of "must have" gadget.

    But I could see them essentially buying up huge chunks of content - music, movies, television catalogs - in a way that gives them complete and total control over how they are able to run the content part of iTunes.

    I could see them trying to set up their own cell/data provider, starting with the most advanced networks they could.

    The problem with those would be that, given the way Apple has historically handled negotiating with the content providers and their network carriers, Apple made the lion's share of the profits and had the relatively easy part while the providers and networks made money but had to deal with the more difficult parts (like provide service).

    I could see them doing something like taking a lot of that money and starting up their own idea incubator - they have a LOT of very smart people working for them and wanting to work for them - and just basically being a venture capital group. That's been done before, of course, but I could see Apple trying to do it again, but this time "right" since that's one thing they tend to do well.

    As for what such a load of cash is a sign of - I think in Apple's case it's more a sign that they REALLY didn't anticipate the level of success that they had. Usually in business it's a very good idea to plan for as many failure modes as you can think of as well as how to build on successes, but most people don't go, "Gee, and if we sell 20x as much as we think we could we should buy everyone ponies and have free ice cream day!"

    If they were completely out of ideas, I don't think we'd see Tim Cook walking around saying "We're trying to think of the best way to handle this" - I think he'd be flat-out lying and saying "We have amazing things in store for these funds" while trying desperately to see if there's anything "magical" they can pull out of their asses.

    --
    Since I can't tell them apart, I treat all ACs as the same person.