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UK Plans Private Police Force

An anonymous reader writes "'Private companies could take responsibility for investigating crimes, patrolling neighborhoods and even detaining suspects under a radical privatization plan,' The Guardian reports. 'The contract is the largest on police privatization so far, with a potential value of £1.5bn over seven years, rising to a possible £3.5bn depending on how many other forces get involved.' A worrying development in a country with an ever-increasing culture of surveillance and intrusive policing."

8 of 252 comments (clear)

  1. Re:Great... by fuzzyfuzzyfungus · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'd buy that for a pound sterling!

  2. Re:Of course, prior to mid 1800s by TFAFalcon · · Score: 4, Funny

    Well in some ways it might be good to return to that kind of an arrangement for a few days each year. Just long enough to lynch the outgoing politicians on the day after elections. Now that would be a pretty good motivator to stop pissing voters off.

  3. A Bit of Fry and Laurie: Prescient by Tommy+Bologna · · Score: 4, Funny
  4. Look at the positive side by houghi · · Score: 3, Funny

    Instead of catching small time thieves, they could go after the bankers.

    One can dream

    --
    Don't fight for your country, if your country does not fight for you.
  5. Get hooligans off the streets of Britian . . . by PolygamousRanchKid+ · · Score: 5, Funny

    . . . and into private police uniforms where they belong!

    Bobby Helmets, the new look for Hoodies, Next Generation.

    Dim: Well. Well, well. Well, well, well, well, if it isn't little Alex. Long time no viddy, droog. How goes?
    Alex: It's... it's impossible. I don't believe it.
    Georgie: Evidence of the old glazzies. Nothing up their sleeves. No magic, little Alex. A job for two, who are now of job age. The police.

    --
    Schroedinger's Brexit: The UK is both in and out of the EU at the same time!
  6. Re:Of course, prior to mid 1800s by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    Witch hunts were also common back then. Real ones, where they'd take women who'd committed no crime and burn them at the stake.

    No crime except witchcraft.

  7. And in the not too distant future... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    Dispatch: Hello, what is the emergency?
    You: Someone is breaking into my house!
    Dispatch: I see. Please hold while I lookup your account.
    You: What? Hurry, I think he's inside!
    Dispatch: Okay, it looks like you have our Basic State protection. We can dispatch an officer within 20 minutes. If you upgrade now to our RapidResponse plan for only 10.99 a month for the first year, we can dispatch an officer immediately.
    You: Yeah, whatever, just send them now!
    Dispatch: I'll be glad to ma'am. May I please have your credit card number?
    You: No, it's in the room with the robber.
    Dispatch: I understand. I'll go ahead and send out our standard officer. You should expect one within 25 to 30 minutes. You can call back at anytime to upgrade to our RapidResponse plan. Don't forget to ask about our low crime rate discount.
    You: He's got a gun!
    Dispatch: Have a good day, ma'am!

  8. Re:Great... by KingBenny · · Score: 3, Funny

    yea, looks like the fingermen will get their chance to try and rape princess Padme after all

    --
    Free speech was meant to be free for all... how can anyone grow up in a nanny state ?