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The Sounds of Tech Past
itwbennett writes "If you're of a certain generation, the screech of a modem, the stuttering song of the dot matrix printer, and the wet slap of a mimeograph machine can transport you to simpler (or at least slower) times. JR Raphael has rounded up 20 tech sounds on the brink of extinction for your listening torture. We're only sorry we don't have smell-o-vision to bring you that sweet mimeograph scent."
Nice
A nice fun article (annoyingly presented for maximum ad viewing as usual) although they were kind of stretching near the end.
I’ll add is what I can only refer to as “the CRT sound”. That little “vwhoom” you hear when you turn them on and “ktchuck” when you turn them off (onomatopoeia is fun!).
Also the sounds stereo equipment used to make when you turned it on (relays clicking, various feedback sounds similar to the CRT up there) and the satisfying clicks all the various switches and knobs made (I still have a microwave that has physical dials and buttons on it in the basement.. I dare not turn it on!).
On the whole I consider myself a peaceful person. But JR Raphael, well something bad should happen to him for this. Make a list of "sounds" - based on a couple I saw this meant grasping pretty far to make sure the list made it to twenty. Why twenty? Because that is 10 pages worth. 2 "sounds" per page. Then just search youtbue for a video that included each sound. But don't actually watch all of the video. Instead just slap them up there so people can watch a 64 second video of a floppy drive that only has the floppy drive sound for 20 seconds or so. Or the sound of a slide projector, with a guy talking about the fact that it functions, I assume he made the video to help sell the projector. The topper was enjoying the 'sound' of a mimeograph machine while the video blasted Cat Stevens into my ears. It's like a test for the Sucker's Showcase (my favorite skit from Steve Martin's Best Show Ever). If you actually look at all 10 pages you qualify. Me, I bailed at the 5th page so I'm guessing that means I'm only mildly retarded.
It's hard to believe that's how Micronians are made. Why don't we see it right now by having you both kiss one another?
Here: http://www.itworld.com/print/260490
K Man
They should have used the Apple Disc II. I always loved the sound of that drive. Kind of a soft swishing, not the angry gronk noise of most 5.25" drives.
I also fondly remember the sound of an Atari 800 booting from floppy. Especially if you had the US Doubler modification... the sound of speed.
All those sounds, and no mention of loading programs from cassette tape. Nothing like actually being able to HEAR the software as it loads in to your TI-99/4A.
The author (and commentators) have it wrong. These are not mimeographs we remember sniffing. (Perhaps we sniffed too many?)
Mimeographs used a stencil-type master and squeezed ink, usually black, onto the target paper. The mimeo master had to be typewritten; only a typewriter's forcefulness could penetrate the template, forming the stencil. An electric typewriter was generally required for a consistent result. (But set the impact force too high, and you'd end up with punched-out o's, p's, b's, a's, etc.)
Dittos used a carbon-based master and imprinted (usually purple) image onto the target paper via a methanol-based solvent of distinctive aroma. There was no ink. Ditto masters could be typewritten or drawn-on by a ballpoint pen.
Dittos possessed the "sweet scent" the author mentions. (I doubt that scent was particularly healthy, methanol being toxic.) The scent would fade with time. If the copy was particularly fresh, the paper would be ever so slightly damp and cool from the solvent.
So: Dittos, not mimeographs. Dittos. Nobody ever enjoyed sniffing a mimeographed copy. They were pretty hard on the eyes, too.
Dittos were great for classroom use, which is why so many of us over the age of forty remember them and their smell. They could make a few dozen copies per master, were cheap and didn't require a typewriter. Their ability to form an image faded with the number of copies. The masters also aged in their box and grew pale.
By comparison, mimeos could render many hundreds of pages per master, and the master could be re-used. So dittos were for each teacher's quizzes and study sheets and homework assignments, whereas the arrival of a mimeographed page heralded a missive from Administration to the whole school.
Ditto machines were usually hand-cranked. Mimeos were usually electrically-powered.
Teachers and office staff often enlisted student help in making dittos--a key perk of being a recognized member of the AV squad--but the hulking mimeo machine was dangerous and off-limits to kids. But oh, what an allure that humming, complicated, mysterious monstrosity cast upon us proto-geeks... I well recall the day I was shown how it's used by a kindly admin secretary. The master was held in place on the drum with hooks! Versus a clamp on the ditto machine. Hook, smooth, check ink level, load paper, press a button. Whir, whir, ca-chunk, whir, ca-chunk, whir, ca-chunk.... Then, with the twist of a knob, it would pick up speed. whircachunkwhircachunkwhircachunk... The mind reeled.
Many differences.
Get it straight.
In 1970 I was a print jockey feeding six IBM 1403 printers, producing junk mail. When I got home from work I needed a shower before my wife would come near me. The printer dust thrown off as the forms cycled through the printers filled our lungs, clogged our nasal passages, and permeated our clothing.
"There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy." Hamlet (I, v, 166-167)
Ok, show of hands, how many people here could diagnose modem connection problems and handshake speeds by listening?
Lets see if I can do this justice.
Beee beeee beeeeeeee boo waaa woooo waaaaaaaaa bzzzzzzzzup thup thup thup thup thup thup thup PING! PING fwashhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Ok, name that connection speed!
Two words:
1. Filmstrips
2. Beep
(For all you whippersnappers on my lawn, instead of watching actual movies, we'd watch essentially a roll of slide film that was projected, and the accompanying audio, on either tape or LP, would have the narrator pause, then a "BEEP" was made to indicate it was time for the oh-so-important (*cough*) member of the AV squad (only person who could be trusted to load the projector properly) to advance one frame).
Strowger (step by step electromechanical) telephone exchanges were still in use in Britain right into the early 1990s. Our local exchange was one right up to about 1990, and it always seemed to like adding line noise to any call you made using a modem.
A now retired work colleague used to be a telecom engineer, and he worked on these machines when they were still in large exchanges (right into the late 1980s!). There is nothing electronic about these telephone switches, they are literally physical switches. The machine that makes the tones (dialing tone, busy tone, number unobtainable, exchange busy, ringing tone) is not an electronic oscillator, it is a huge machine driven by a DC motor with a bunch of switches to make the cadence of the various tones (I guess the actual tone is made by a contact disc and wipers) - it's called a Ringer 2A.
The stuff that connects calls is an intricate network of physical switches. When you lift the handset, a stepper motor driven uniselector finds you a free first selector. This too is an electromechanical machine, with a bunch of relays and a bidirectional switch which can make one of 100 contacts. When you dial, the wiper steps up to the level you dial (so dial a 3, and it steps up to level 3), and then it steps horizontally to find the next free stage in the exchange, and so on, until you dial the last number. The last selector steps up to the number you dial, then steps horizontally to the last digit of the number you dial, and tries to connect you to the other end.
As you can imagine, a large telephone exchange is an incredibly noisy place because there are switches and relays constantly in motion. My colleague described working late one night in one of these exchanges. It was quiet, with just the odd call progressing (he said you could hear a single call stepping through the exchange - you could physically hear how far the dialing had progressed by where the sound of switch and relay motion was coming from). Then all of a sudden, the noise started to build up as more and more people were making calls, until the place was a deafening racket. Wondering what the hell was going on, he phoned headquarters and found out the reason - a soap opera had ended in some sort of controversy and everyone was gossiping about it.
These electromechanical machines seemed *alive*. If you look on youtube, there's quite a few videos of them in action (various designs from various countries). There used to be a working rack of Strowger gear at the London Science Museum, probably for lack of someone to maintain it it's unfortunately now just a static exhibit (or at least was, a couple of years ago). But when it was working it was fun to get all 8 phones connected to each other, then replace the handsets simulataneously. The sound of all the selectors returning home at once was sweet enough to make a brave man cry.
Also it's quite easy to see why the phone used to be so hideously expensive. It wasn't just because of the then GPO monopoly, but because it took 30 engineers to keep a busy 10,000 line Strowger exchange working. Today, it takes 1 engineer to keep six 10,000 line digital exchanges working.
Oolite: Elite-like game. For Mac, Linux and Windows
It's hell to get old, isn't it?
Rumor has it that the alternative is worse.
Three or four months ago, my wife told my 16-year old stepson to call and see if the person that cuts his hair was working that day. There was a big to-do that day about him not wanting to do anything for himself, and one of the results of that was the need for him to make this call rather than relying on his mom. Anyway, after some typical teenage bitching he went off to his room to call the place with his cell phone. A few minutes pass and comes out again.
Him: "The phone isn't working."
Us: "It's not working. Really. Did you dial the right number?"
Him: "Yeah! Of course I did! I'm not that stupid. It's just making some weird noise."
Us: "What number did you dial?"
Him: [He told us.]
I got my cell and called that number. [beeeeep] [pause] [beeeeep] [pause] [beeeeep]
Us: "That, son, is a busy signal."
Him: "A what?"