Microsoft Posts First Quarterly Loss Ever

← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)

Microsoft Posts First Quarterly Loss Ever

Posted by samzenpus on Thursday July 19, 2012 @11:13AM from the hole-in-the-bucket dept.

HangingChad writes "Microsoft's announcement of a late October release date for Windows 8 was eclipsed by its earnings report, in which the computer giant posted its first-ever quarterly loss since going public in 1986. The loss stems from Microsoft's continued struggles with the online services division."

9 of 327 comments (clear)

Min score:

Reason:

Sort:

Yay! by Anonymous Coward · 2012-07-19 11:17 · Score: 5, Funny

We waited for this for too long!
1. Re:Yay! by Anonymous Coward · 2012-07-19 11:24 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  Yes!! They are totally in their final days! If they do this 80-100 more times they'll be finished!!!
2. Re:Yay! by Pesticidal · 2012-07-19 13:21 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  Shouldn't that be Brokeback Mountain Lion?
MSFT got distracted by... by acjacinto · 2012-07-19 11:29 · Score: 4, Funny

0xB16B00B5

Ref: http://linux.slashdot.org/story/12/07/19/1923200/microsoft-apologizes-for-inserting-naughty-phrase-into-linux-kernel
Re:Take a look at the details by MightyMartian · 2012-07-19 11:36 · Score: 5, Funny

That loss is entirely down to the aQuantive 6.2 billion writedown. As far as analyst estimates are concerned, taking that into account, this is actually a beat. Take a look at after-hours stock price movement. Did MSFT get slammed?
No, but in a distant corner of the galaxy, Gronek II, Emperor of the Seventh Moon of Choil, after a tasty breakfast of fried duzelwip, lightly salted wurp jelly and a hot steaming cup of rinok-sphoo, opens up his paper to find out that his most beloved child, the fruit of his loins, the offspring of his brief but tumultuous marriage to Princess Nerb the Six-breasted; Steve Ballmer, has ceased to throw chairs, fuck over Netscape and perform all those other ceremonies one would expect of a scion of the proud house of Choil, and in his greater anger has spat out an orifice-full of hot rinok-sphoo. Before the Sixth Moon of Choil has done its second transit, the invasion fleet will be in place, and Steve Ballmer, once proud Prince of Choil will have to answer for his actions.

--
The world's burning. Moped Jesus spotted on I50. Details at 11.
Re:First post by Anonymous Coward · 2012-07-19 11:42 · Score: 2, Funny

More like M-$
Re:First post by Anonymous Coward · 2012-07-19 11:47 · Score: 4, Funny

Shit, dont any of you know Accounting 101?
(M$)
Re:Another Shitty Summary. by bitt3n · 2012-07-19 12:58 · Score: 5, Funny

the Windows/Office cash cow is running out of steam.
I think this is a relevant moment to reflect on that timeless investment maxim, "never put money in a company whose profits depend on a steam-powered cow."

--
how many pairs of boxer shorts should you own?
Re:Another Shitty Summary. by jrumney · 2012-07-19 15:56 · Score: 1, Funny

For Microsoft, this ends at $0 per share.
They seem to realise this, and are making the most of the 0xB16B00B5 (or vagina) while they still can.