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The Pacific Ocean Is Polluted With Coffee

Posted by Unknown on from the marianas-trench-starbucks-grand-opening dept.

An anonymous reader writes in with this excerpt from Inhabitat:"People aren't the only ones getting a jolt from caffeine these days; in a new study published in Marine Pollution Bulletin, scientists found elevated concentrations of caffeine in the Pacific Ocean in areas off the coast of Oregon. With all those coffee drinkers in the Pacific Northwest, it should be no surprise that human waste containing caffeine would ultimately make its way through municipal water systems and out to sea – but how will the presence of caffeine in our oceans affect human health and natural ecosystems?"

3 of 294 comments (clear)

  1. I blame Starbucks by gmhowell · · Score: 0, Troll

    Everybody wants to appear cool on the coast, so they buy coffee from Starbucks. Then they take a sip and find out that 'burnt' is not a pleasant flavor. The remainder gets pitched and winds up...

    In the ocean.

    The cup then gets refilled with something more to the American coffee drinker's palate, like McDonald's, Dunkin' Donuts, or 7-11.

    --
    Jesus was all right but his disciples were thick and ordinary. -John Lennon
  2. Starbucks by AlphaWolf_HK · · Score: -1, Troll

    I know I'll probably get modded troll for this, but good luck separating liberals in California from Starbucks!

    Personally I've never acquired a taste for coffee. I know it has a few health benefits, but it's just too bitter.

    --
    Careful with names containing L slashdot.org/~AiphaWolf_HK slashdot.org/~AlphaWoif_HK slashdot.org/~AiphaWoif_HK
  3. Easy Fix by BlueStrat · · Score: -1, Troll

    Kill All Humans

    It's what Bender would suggest.

    More than likely this will go nowhere and end up meaning little.

    However, if one of the green groups gets traction with it, huge amounts of taxpayer money and reams of regulations will go into "Starbucks-abatement" programs.

    Maybe we can even get another government-mandated toilet re-design. The last one accomplished a lot. Like making sure US Border Agents are spending time searching through semi's full of toilets from Mexico to make sure they are compliant with US regulations.

    I guess we can now thank the US Government for the rise of Mexican illegal-toilet cartels.

    Don't ask what they shoot you with.

    Strat

    --
    Progressivism (aka US 'Liberalism'): Ideas so good they need a police/surveillance-state to enforce.