How Do You Eat a Triceratops? Start By Ripping the Head Off

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How Do You Eat a Triceratops? Start By Ripping the Head Off

Posted by timothy on Thursday October 25, 2012 @07:13AM from the steamed-with-beer-and-old-bay dept.

scibri writes "Once a Tyrannosaurus took down a Triceratops, how did it go about eating it? By looking at the bite marks on Triceratops fossils, a group of paleontologists have pieced together the steps, and created an illustrated guide. Step one? Pull off the head."

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Sounds like by Anonymous Coward · 2012-10-25 07:16 · Score: 5, Funny

Sounds like an afternoon on bath salts.
Ah Yes! Triceratops ... by Anonymous Coward · 2012-10-25 07:20 · Score: 5, Funny

... the "gummy bear" of dinosaurs.
Step 4 by Bob+the+Super+Hamste · 2012-10-25 07:22 · Score: 4, Funny

Step four: feast on the delicacies beneath the frill.
I am so making a T-shirt with these pictures and captions.

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Time to offend someone
1. Re:Step 4 by avgjoe62 · 2012-10-25 08:03 · Score: 2
  
  I REALLY did not want the image of Barney eating Baby Bop planted in my head. I already suspected that purple monstrosity was perverted - this will just make me cringe even more every time I hear that sodding theme song...
  
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2. Re:Step 4 by ackthpt · 2012-10-25 09:24 · Score: 2
  
  I was leaning more towards "Step three: nibble on the soft flesh of Triceratops' face."
  Step 5: T. Rex throws the carcass on a grill, pulls out a few brews and throws a BBQ party.
  
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  A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
3. Re:Step 4 by RivenAleem · 2012-10-26 01:54 · Score: 2
  
  Step 5 polish the skull and mount it on your spaceship wall.
The Oatmeal is slacking by boristdog · 2012-10-25 07:34 · Score: 4, Funny

The Oatmeal should have been all over this guide like...well, like a T-rex on a Triceratops.
Taking down a triceratops? by camperdave · 2012-10-25 07:35 · Score: 5, Insightful

"Once a Tyrannosaurus took down a Triceratops, how did it go about eating it?"

I thought T-Rex was downgraded from a hunter/killer to a carcass plundering carrion eater, like a buzzard. Besides, didn't these Triceratopses have soft underbellies and such? Seems to me that the neck and face bits would be the LAST to go, not the first.

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1. Re:Taking down a triceratops? by Chuckstar · 2012-10-25 10:39 · Score: 4, Informative
  
  I thought T-Rex was downgraded from a hunter/killer to a carcass plundering carrion eater, like a buzzard.
  There's still debate on this subject, but IMHO there's really too much evidence to the contrary to believe that T.Rex was a scavenger specialist (although pretty much all predators will eat carrion when available). The most interesting evidence are fossil bones of T.Rex prey that have partially-healed tooth marks that could only have been made by T.Rex. This is evidence of an animal that survived a T.Rex attack long enough for bone to partially heal (months/years). That would be hard if T.Rex were only a carrion specialist.
  There was always a lot of skepticism of the scavenger hypothesis. Just looking at T.Rex would tend to create skepticism. T.Rex is big, muscular, has incredibly strong jaws, lots and lots of sharp piercing teeth... definitely was the scariest thing around at the time. The biggest, scariest meat eater in any ecosystem is rarely a scavenger specialist.
  Another problem with the scavenger specialization idea is that T.Rex would have had pretty good binocular vision. Very useful for a predator. Scavengers don't need it so much.
  We still don't have good evidence about T.Rex's hunting style, though. I think one of the reasons the scavenger specialist idea has been so intriguing is that people had a hard time figuring out how T.Rex could take down something like Triceratops, given it's pretty tough defenses. Also, there is some evidence that T.Rex would not have been a fast runner, so how did it chase down some of the prey that seems like it would have been fast runners?
  When they find the partially-healed T.Rex bite marks I mentioned above, however, they tend to be on the prey's back. This would be pretty standard for a failed take-down, even among today's predators. Was it in fact a fast runner catching up from behind? If so, how did it take down Triceratops, which would probably turn and defend itself. Perhaps T.Rex was an ambush hunter, like today's Komodo Dragons, coming out of large brush and attacking from the side. Maybe T.Rex was a social hunter and surrounded its prey. I like to imagine T.Rex could leap over Triceratops horns, get behind it, get a grip on it's back, and shake it to death... But I have NO evidence for that, it's just fun to imagine.
Re:First shoot it with a .458 magnum - several tim by K.+S.+Kyosuke · 2012-10-25 07:44 · Score: 4, Insightful

And what if the T-Rex is left-handed? How is he going to operate the bolt mechanism? It's not like specialty rifles tend to cater for physiological minorities.

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Ezekiel 23:20
Gone of the Head. by VortexCortex · 2012-10-25 07:52 · Score: 2

It all seems familiar somehow.
Step one: "Removing the head, or destroying the brain..."
Let me guess, step two is: "You've got red on you.",
and step three involves being "a bit bite-y."
If that T-Rex is wielding a cricket bat it's proof what killed off the dinosaurs wasn't the asteroid -- It was the Zombies it caused.
What a stupid question. by The+Grim+Reefer · 2012-10-25 08:03 · Score: 2

"Once a Tyrannosaurus took down a Triceratops, how did it go about eating it?"

Any way it wanted to, of course.
I can just picture Miss manners telling it to place a napkin on it's lap and which fork to use...
Then becoming one of the hors d'oeuvres
Triceratops by khr · 2012-10-25 08:11 · Score: 4, Funny

Triceratops... It's what's for dinner!
Re:Which end of a hot dog do you bite first? by ackthpt · 2012-10-25 08:17 · Score: 2

The end that's closer to your mouth!
Most predators I've seen go for the soft tissues, first. Liver, stomach, intestines, etc., muscle tissue usually eaten after it has "seasoned" a few days.
As they are looking at fossils I'm wondering how they are determining the order in which feeding took place. Perhaps T. Rex hung around such a large kill for days, feeding until it was sated or felt like getting something fresh.

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A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
Re:First shoot it with a .458 magnum - several tim by TubeSteak · 2012-10-25 08:36 · Score: 2

If you can afford a specialty hunting rifle, you can probably afford to have one made or modified for a left handed grip.

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Re:First shoot it with a .458 magnum - several tim by operagost · 2012-10-25 08:43 · Score: 2

Why do the French need such a powerful gun to surrender?

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What Wine Would You Serve? by avgjoe62 · 2012-10-25 09:01 · Score: 3, Funny

White? Red? Or would you serve it with some fava beans and a fine chianti?

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Re:Ah Yes! Triceratops ... by Genda · 2012-10-25 09:03 · Score: 4, Funny

No, more of a Jurassic Pinata.
Re:First shoot it with a .458 magnum - several tim by Chris+Burke · 2012-10-25 09:10 · Score: 4, Funny

Surrender is safest and easiest when the enemy is dead.

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Apparently just like a chocolate bunny by jbezorg · 2012-10-25 09:12 · Score: 2

/ that's all I got...

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The important question remains unanswered... by hey! · 2012-10-25 09:33 · Score: 2

Hot sauce or garlic butter?
If the flavor is kind of just "meh", you break out the pepper sauce. If the taste is *nasty* you go for the garlic butter.

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Re:First shoot it with a .458 magnum - several tim by gonzonista · 2012-10-25 09:34 · Score: 2

Doesn't matter. Have you seen those tiny arms? T Rex will never be able to shoot straight.

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Re:Ah Yes! Triceratops ... by Nidi62 · 2012-10-25 09:48 · Score: 4, Funny

Actually, when I eat gummi bears, I usually eat the legs first, then the arms, then head, leaving the torso for last. Yes, I like my gummi bears to suffer and probably need some professional help.

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Re:Ah Yes! Triceratops ... by jonadab · 2012-10-25 13:48 · Score: 3, Informative

Wait...

There are people who eat gummy bears one at a time (as opposed to just tossing handfuls of them into your gaping maw)?

Huh. I learn somethin' new every day. Thanks, Slashdot.

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