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Badgers Block British Broadband Buildout

Posted by Soulskill on from the badger-badger-badger dept.

twoheadedboy writes "When BT engineers set out to lay fiber broadband cables in remote areas in North Yorkshire, they didn't think they would have many issues. But they didn't see the badgers coming. They discovered badger setts along the planned route for a cable connecting 450 properties to the local exchange. As it is illegal to destroy or upset setts — badgers are considered an endangered species — BT has had to hold off putting down the fiber until it either gains permission from the National Trust or comes up with fresh plans."

86 comments

  1. Hah by Sparticus789 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Alliteration x5. Awesome!

    --
    sudo make me a sandwich
    1. Re:Hah by bobdehnhardt · · Score: 2

      Alliterative aspects augment awesome article attributes.

    2. Re:Hah by SJHillman · · Score: 1

      Reminds me of
      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buffalo_buffalo_Buffalo_buffalo_buffalo_buffalo_Buffalo_buffalo

    3. Re:Hah by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Biting Badgers Block British Broadband Buildout by BT

    4. Re:Hah by Z00L00K · · Score: 1

      Badgers

      Cute Badgers

      Badgers in the wild

      Mounted Badger

      [Taxidermist - Man who mounts animals]

      --
      If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker would destroy civilization.
    5. Re:Hah by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I think that your joke is slightly off, you assonant-hole.

    6. Re:Hah by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This is Slashdot. The word I think you're looking for is "illiteration."

    7. Re:Hah by thomst · · Score: 1

      Badgers?

      We don't need no stinkin' badgers!

      --
      Check out my novel.
    8. Re:Hah by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      [Taxidermist - Man who mounts animals]

      I knew a man once who mounted animals he definitely wasn't called a Taxidermist.

    9. Re:Hah by cold+fjord · · Score: 1

      My thoughts on the matter?

      Better being bedeviled by badgers blocking bucolic British broadband buildout than buggered bolting blokes being butchered by biting beavers in Belarus.

      Old sketch: Copper clappers

      --
      much of left-wing thought is a kind of playing with fire by people who don't even know that fire is hot - George Orwell
  2. Easy by Dr.+Sheldon+Cooper · · Score: 1

    Go. Around.

    --
    Bazinga.
  3. Bollocks! by Megane · · Score: 2

    Bloody badgers. Blocking broadband bites.

    --
    #naabhaprzrag, #sverubfr-000, #agi-fcbafberq, negvpyr[pynff*=' negvpyr-ary-'] { qvfcynl: abar !vzcbegnag; }
    1. Re:Bollocks! by game+kid · · Score: 1

      British badgers: beautifully badass.

      I'm game kid and I approve this story.

      --
      You can hold down the "B" button for continuous firing.
    2. Re:Bollocks! by gstoddart · · Score: 2

      Bleedin' bastards buggered the bunch, bitches.

      --
      Lost at C:>. Found at C.
    3. Re:Bollocks! by Tablizer · · Score: 1

      My fav B headline was, "Boehner Bashes Beatle Because Bush Bypassed Books"

      This was when John Boehner condemned Paul McCartney for saying, "It's good to have a president who knows what a library is" when Obama was elected.

      --
      Table-ized A.I.
    4. Re:Bollocks! by gstoddart · · Score: 2

      My fav has always been line from the exploding whale video where the announcer says "The blast blew blubber beyond all bounds of belief" -- that and watching people running from the falling chunks of whale is just awesome.

      --
      Lost at C:>. Found at C.
    5. Re:Bollocks! by OakDragon · · Score: 1

      -- that and watching people running from the falling chunks of whale is just awesome.

      Did any one say "Oh! The huge manatee!" ?

      --
      Dark Reflection
  4. BBBBB by Tablizer · · Score: 1

    Bring Better "B" Banners, Buster! Bad Banners Bring Boredom. Brilliant Banners Bask & Beam.

    --
    Table-ized A.I.
  5. Mushroom mushroom? by Nidi62 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Just use snakes. Everyone knows badgers are afraid of snakes. Oooh-ooooh.

    --
    The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for it to be pitted against a slightly greater evil
    1. Re:Mushroom mushroom? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      American badgers eat pretty much anything smaller than them including snakes, squirrels, rabbits, prairie dogs, mice, birds, gophers, house cats, chihuahua, toy poodles... as far as I know they are not an endangered species here... yet.

    2. Re:Mushroom mushroom? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You sound young. Or wayyyy old.

    3. Re:Mushroom mushroom? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Untrue. It's widely known that they don't care.

    4. Re:Mushroom mushroom? by R3d+M3rcury · · Score: 0

      Maybe if they built a large wooden badger...

    5. Re:Mushroom mushroom? by OakDragon · · Score: 1

      ... and especially RABBITS!

      --
      Dark Reflection
    6. Re:Mushroom mushroom? by OakDragon · · Score: 1

      And to get rid of the snakes, we'll send in the gorillas. That's the beautiful part. When wintertime rolls around, the gorillas simply freeze to death.

      --
      Dark Reflection
    7. Re:Mushroom mushroom? by Hognoxious · · Score: 1

      American badgers eat pretty much anything smaller than them including snakes, squirrels, rabbits, prairie dogs, mice, birds, gophers, house cats, chihuahua, toy poodles...

      Are American badgers fat, by any chance?

      --
      Confucius say, "Find worm in apple - bad. Find half a worm - worse."
    8. Re:Mushroom mushroom? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I'd say way old as his spelling and grammar doesn't follow the pattern of a young kid.

  6. Headline is pretty good, but by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Bloody Bureaucrat-Beloved Badgers Bollix Bitchin British BroadBand Buildout is better.

  7. Damn Badgers by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    You've just given BT an excuse to be incrediby lazy and avoid laying fiber down for years.

    1. Re:Damn Badgers by Stormthirst · · Score: 1

      This is BT. They don't need an excuse.

  8. Endangered, but... by fatgraham · · Score: 1

    They still get in the way and need a cull once in a while. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-22614350

    Are they really endangered? (Getting offtopic...)

    1. Re:Endangered, but... by Shimbo · · Score: 2

      Are they really endangered?

      No. However they are protected under the Protection of Badgers Act 1992. It's more to do with trying to prevent badger baiting than rarity.

    2. Re:Endangered, but... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      You need to understand that the UK has a long history of being both a nation of animal lovers and bloodthirsty idiots.

      The former come from all walks of life, living in both rural and urban areas, and often have very little in common other than a love of animals.

      The latter come from opposite extremes of society, that is to say the landed gentry and the chavs. They often accusing the former of being "townies" or "not understanding the ways of the country," which presumably means "possessing a suspiciously above-room-temperature IQ."

    3. Re:Endangered, but... by c0lo · · Score: 1

      Are they really endangered? (Getting offtopic...)

      Well... the minister doesn't really need to know

      --
      Questions raise, answers kill. Raise questions to stay alive.
    4. Re:Endangered, but... by c0lo · · Score: 1

      You need to understand that the UK has a long history of being both a nation of animal lovers and bloodthirsty idiots.

      History... mmmm!

      The consensus at our meeting was that it was only the urban intellectual middle class who worry about the preservation of the countryside because they don't have to live in it. They just read about it. Bernard says their protest is rooted more in Thoreau than in anger.

      ... apparently, there is no badger colony in Hayward's Spinney. Apparently, the wording of the report says: "The last evidence of badger habitation - dropping, freshly-turned earth, etc. - was recorded eleven years ago".

      --
      Questions raise, answers kill. Raise questions to stay alive.
  9. Badgers? by dkleinsc · · Score: 1, Funny

    Badgers? Badgers!? We don't need no stinkin' badgers!

    --
    I am officially gone from /. Long live http://www.soylentnews.com/
  10. Badgers badgers badgers! by Mattsson · · Score: 1

    Here's a film depicting the problem:
    Badgers badgers badgers!

    --
    /.Mattsson - My native language is not English, so please don't whine over linguistic errors. (That's lame anyway...)
    1. Re:Badgers badgers badgers! by GodfatherofSoul · · Score: 1

      It took me over 20 years to figure out this joke. It wasn't until I went through the AFI 100 greatest list a few years back.

      --
      I swear to God...I swear to God! That is NOT how you treat your human!
  11. Fiber Pull Coming Through? by bill_mcgonigle · · Score: 1

    British badgers don't care.

    --
    My God, it's Full of Source!
    OUTSIDE_IP=$(dig +short my.ip @outsideip.net)
    1. Re:Fiber Pull Coming Through? by abarrow · · Score: 1

      It's Honey Badgers that don't give a shit.

      British badgers just aren't terribly bothered.

    2. Re:Fiber Pull Coming Through? by GodfatherofSoul · · Score: 1

      British badgers would never be so crude as to simply not "give a fuck." British badgers press on with steely resolve and a stiff upper lip.

      --
      I swear to God...I swear to God! That is NOT how you treat your human!
  12. Endangered except... by TonyJohn · · Score: 3, Insightful

    "badgers are considered an endangered species" except where it's been decided to kill lots of them.

    I won't comment except to say that it seems very inconsistent. J

    --
    Owl tried to think of something wise to say, but couldn't.
    1. Re:Endangered except... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      We already have enough scientific evidence to know that culling badgers won't reduce TB in cattle. But farmers are saying to the minister: ‘If you don't start culling badgers, you aren't doing anything for us and we'll not just stop voting for you, we'll turn this into a big media circus about how the government doesn't care about its hard-working people.’ So the minister lets the culls go ahead.

    2. Re:Endangered except... by ThatsNotPudding · · Score: 1

      "badgers are considered an endangered species" except where it's been decided to kill lots of them [bbc.co.uk].

      I won't comment except to say that it seems very inconsistent. J

      Just the ones that refuse to purchase a broadband package.

    3. Re:Endangered except... by BitwizeGHC · · Score: 1

      Meet the Australian White Ibis. Their natural habitat has been threatened, but these greedy, stinky, noisy birds have made themselves quite at home in municipal areas rummaging through people's garbage. Accordingly, the Australian Government isn't sure whether to consider them an endangered species or a pest.

      --
      N4st0r, trixx0r h0bb1tz0rz! Th3y st0l3 0ur pr3c10uzz!
    4. Re:Endangered except... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Nature magazine has already poo-pooed the "farmers" complaints, all the evidence is against them, but the UK government gives them the rights to wipe them out. After badgers have been cleared from areas, the cattle still have TB problems. The simple solution is to inoculate, but the farmers are terrified it will effect their misguided prestige of the "British Beef" label. The reality is, the shopper doesn't give a shit, they only want cheep beef.

    5. Re:Endangered except... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The simple solution is to inoculate, but the farmers are terrified it will effect their misguided prestige of the "British Beef" label.

      The problem is the TB test. Vaccinated cattle would test positive too so after vaccination it would become impossible to isolate the actually infected animals.

    6. Re:Endangered except... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Which is not a problem in any way if you simply vaccinate all cattle.

    7. Re:Endangered except... by Hognoxious · · Score: 1

      Or if you know which ones you've vaccinated.

      --
      Confucius say, "Find worm in apple - bad. Find half a worm - worse."
  13. Awesome alliteration, asshole. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Bite big badger balls, buddy.

  14. Badger, badger, badger by stevegee58 · · Score: 2

    Mushroom

    1. Re:Badger, badger, badger by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Oh, it's a snake!

    2. Re:Badger, badger, badger by alexs001 · · Score: 1

      England England http://www.weebls-stuff.com/songs/footy/

  15. We don't need no stinking Badgers by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    We don't need no stinking Badgers. I've lived in an area where Badgers are all over....a mean nasty little animal. Hate to be the boring crew that pissed off one of those animals.

    1. Re:We don't need no stinking Badgers by Optali · · Score: 1

      Well, we don't need no stinking nerds ;) These little stinky critters with fat asses and glasses. Hate them. Unfortunately they use to be rather soft, not good for using them as heavy bag for training. Maybe they would be a nice alternative for vivisection experiments :)

      --
      -- 29A the number of the Beast
  16. Maybe it's just me... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    ...but why would Badgers need broadband?

    1. Re:Maybe it's just me... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      to watch the B(adger) B(roadcasting) C(orporation) of course

  17. UK badger cull about to start!? by Roger+W+Moore · · Score: 2

    Something is wrong somewhere because yesterday in the Guardian there was an article about a UK government badger cull which starts tomorrow to stop the spread of bovine TB due to the large population of badgers. So you can't disturb their setts by digging but it is fine to send out teams of hunters to shoot them?

    1. Re:UK badger cull about to start!? by Stormthirst · · Score: 2

      And yet it has been demonstrated that badger culls don't stop the spread of TB into cattle. If anything, they make it worse.

    2. Re:UK badger cull about to start!? by Sesostris+III · · Score: 1

      Different parts of the country. The badger cull is in the South West (Gloucestershire and Somerset). North Yorkshire is in the North East.

      --
      You never know what is enough unless you know what is more than enough. - Blake
    3. Re:UK badger cull about to start!? by Roger+W+Moore · · Score: 1

      An "endangered" species is one that is in danger of becoming extinct. If there is a healthy population of them living in the south then Badgers are not endangered. You don't get many moose in Yorkshire either (or at least you didn't when I was growing up there) - that does not make them an endangered species. Indeed badgers are not even on the UK list of endangered species.

    4. Re:UK badger cull about to start!? by Xest · · Score: 1

      "Indeed badgers are not even on the UK list of endangered species."

      That's because said list is meaningless, it only lists things where it is, for the most part, already too late.

      Hedgehogs for example had a population of around 40 million in the 50s, but now number under 1 million. If that doesn't fit the definition of "endangered" I don't know what does, if something's population is declining that rapidly I'd say it's pretty fucking endangered.

      Badgers in contrast are at 250,000. The current trial cull is going to kill 2% of the national population (though concentrated in one area), and remember, it's just a tiny trial so if they go for a full cull it will be much bigger. Whether you deem 250,000 spread across the country endangered or not really depends, but certainly they will be if the full cull goes ahead.

    5. Re:UK badger cull about to start!? by Xest · · Score: 1

      Yes, it's called the farming lobby lobbying to shift blame away from anything but themselves.

    6. Re:UK badger cull about to start!? by Roger+W+Moore · · Score: 1

      The current trial cull is going to kill 2% of the national population

      If that is correct then a cull is absolutely insane. There is little to no evidence to support the claims that it will reduce bovine TB and if the number of badgers are that low we should the leaving them alone or - if there is overpopulation in one area - trapping and transplanting them elsewhere (assuming that works for badgers).

    7. Re:UK badger cull about to start!? by Xest · · Score: 1

      What's perhaps most interesting is when you see an overlaid map of bovine TB and UK badger populations. It demonstrates pretty clearly that there's no link between the two, in fact, some of the areas in the UK with low bovine TB have plenty of badgers, and there are many areas with bovine TB that have no badgers.

      When you see a correlation it doesn't necessarily imply causality but it does provide you a starting point to look for causality, but the problem in this case is there's not even a correlation, not even close, so to make the jump to cry causation like the government and farming unions have is just absurd, it makes no sense.

      The problem is I would guess entirely about biosecurity in the South West and West of England, the farmers have done such a poor job of it that TB has become so rife in their cattle that they now can't eradicate it. The government complains that they're paying millions in compensation to farmers so the cull is necessary - that's stupid, what's necessary is to stop paying them any compensation for a problem they've caused themselves so that those who practice poor biosecurity go out of business and the more competent farmers from elsewhere in the UK can take over their land and do it properly.

      Here's the map in question:

      http://www.deadofnightproductions.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/63572079_badgers_bovine_tb_464.gif

      The obvious question is if badgers are responsible for the spread of bovine TB then why have all those TB incidences up in the North and East of England and Scotland not translated into greater spreads? This highlights that it's about biosecurity - when TB is found in these parts of the country the farmers are properly dealing with it.

      But what's particularly interesting is that if you look at the maps of the 2001 foot and mouth outbreak and the map of CJD occurrences in cattle the maps are not too dissimilar though for these two there are greater incidences in the North of England. I'd wager that after these incidents the North of England's farms upped their game, whilst the Western and South Western farms did not. I'd be surprised if it's a coincidence that time and time again this same section of the country sees farm animal disease outbreaks, whilst other parts of the country do not - that is a correlation that you could begin to seek causation from, unlike the badger/TB link where there is not even correlation.

      We do need to end the compensation culture for farmers though, I'd guess that's in part to blame - making it profitable to have disease outbreaks is just stupid.

  18. UGH. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I have always hated that awful flash movie. It is bad.

    1. Re:UGH. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I have always hated that awful flash movie. It is badgers.

  19. Lord No by Impy+the+Impiuos+Imp · · Score: 1

    > "BT has had to hold off putting down the fiber"

    No backup plan? Clearly the dumbasses didn't hedgehog their bets.

    --
    (-1: Post disagrees with my already-settled worldview) is not a valid mod option.
    1. Re:Lord No by Hognoxious · · Score: 1

      Weasel see if you're correct.

      --
      Confucius say, "Find worm in apple - bad. Find half a worm - worse."
  20. Just infect them with Bovine TB by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    simple , then the UK law will insist they are shot immediately, the cull starts today

    I kid you not

  21. in short: by jalvarez13 · · Score: 1

    BBBBB

  22. Q. Why didn't the badger get BT Fiber? by SeaFox · · Score: 1

    A. It already had a good sett up!

  23. Remote Areas by ZombieBraintrust · · Score: 1

    The whole point of living in remote areas is to get away from civilization. If you want infrastructure live in a town. Leave the remote areas alone and enjoy them for what they are.

    1. Re:Remote Areas by J'raxis · · Score: 1

      But no matter how far away from civilization you go, you still have to deal with government bureaucrats telling you what you can and can't do.

      --
      Liberty in your lifetime
  24. Because vector animation has become chopped liver by tepples · · Score: 1

    why would Badgers need broadband?

    Because newer devices don't support Flash, and converting a Flash vector animation to H.264 would bloat it by several times. It's possible to download a Weebl animation such as "Badgers" over dial-up in a minute and a half, but downloading an H.264 conversion would take so long that the viewer would lose interest.

  25. Offer the badgers free broadband, problem solved by MajVariola · · Score: 1

    FIOS for rodentia!

  26. To be specific... by J'raxis · · Score: 1

    The badgets are not blocking the buildout, bureaucrats are.

    I guess the British are unfamiliar with the American landowners' credo: Shoot, shovel, and shut up.

    --
    Liberty in your lifetime
  27. Yorkshire badgers don't care about BT fibre by RevWaldo · · Score: 1

    They're just crazy. They don't give a shit.

    .

    --
    Prisencolinensinainciusol. Ol Rait!
  28. Bloody Badgers Becoming Bothersome by Optali · · Score: 1

    Give them free access, this will solve the issue

    --
    -- 29A the number of the Beast
  29. Badger proof cable by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    My incoming BT broadband cable is 17 feet off the ground. It's remarkably free of badgers, so far.

    But they do like to snuffle around in my 'food waste' bin. Cuuuuute!!!!!

  30. Badgers Block British Broadband Buildout by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Bollocks!

  31. I have a brilliant idea! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Have the badgers lay the fiber!

  32. Route survey by kylegordon · · Score: 1

    Surely this should have been discovered during the route survey, rather than during the engineering works? Typical of BT maybe? What's a route survey??

    1. Re:Route survey by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Surely this should have been discovered during the route survey, rather than during the engineering works?

      I don't think you can conclude that from the article - "engineering work" could mean anything, you can't expect journalists to properly distinguish between the survey and the actual build.

  33. Re: Because vector animation has become chopped li by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Honey badger don't give a fuck. He's all "I'll just start downloading now and come back and watch it later after I eat a snake. Honey badger don't care, he'll use dial up if he has to.

  34. "But they didn't see the badgers coming." by Chris+Mattern · · Score: 1

    Nobody expects the stinkin' badgers!